21st TAMOXIFEN !!

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we are- how did that happen ?

lovely bag envy. I am
Going to hijack one of mini gigs bottle bags for my drain (dh stuck in traffic so waiting on escape).

Sparkles - I hope ds ok. As said before, I love my psycho therapist but there have been sessions where could cheerfully killed her but it has been one of most rewarding things I have done in terms of stress management and quality of life.

One- how is your ds?

Topsy- maybe pig dog could borrow the Henry the octopus costume I have (from the wiggles)- it could go round his middle as a cunning disguise.

Gracie - sending you lots of love and thinking of you . Xxx

Cross posts - Mas so pleased she rang. Hope you are inspired now.

Junior smee currently destroying bouncing on my bed in cape and batman mask, whilst hurling hazelnuts for the cat to retrieve. DS joining forces with PigDog sounds like a lethal combination.

MAS good that your BCN called. Are you going to go in and see her?

Waving to Ned, whilst sneakily trying to steal her bag, as it's lovely.

Wonder how Gracie is. Still thinking of you here too x

@ hazelnut retrieval...
I didn't ask to see her smee - I might if she's around when I go in for my mammogram,which should be in April.
Last piano of term done, quick early supper and off to Concert at school- ds tells me it should be finished by 9 so we can whizz back for Lord SR'Alan
Hope gracie is ok.

Hi All,

Popping on really quickly as I really must feed my children before social services ring my doorbell.

Well generally appointment went well. Hormone receptor tests aren't back yet. He said they can take anything up to 3 weeks. As far as the surgeon is concerned he removed all he needed to and the margins were clear with no spread to the nodes or LVI. He did explain what LVI was and how important a result it was but to be honest it went a bit over my head. The only thing which knocked me for six was the fact the tumour, whilst only small, was Grade 3. I went to the appointment 'hoping' for a Grade 2 at worst so Grade 3 knocked the wind from my sails considerably.

I have to see the oncologist on Friday afternoon but the surgeon's recommendation is for me to have chemo and they will then look at maybe some radiotherapy. From diagnosis I said I would take whatever they threw at me if it gave me a better chance but I think I had myself convinced that the op and radiotherapy would be all that was needed.

The surgeon did say I have been extremely 'lucky' in that if I had of left it until say July the outcome would have been considerably different.

Really must go and feed the troops, feel awful for not catching up on everyone else but I will get a chance after dinner.

Thank you all for sending me good wishes.

MAS I am so glad the bc nurse called, I hope you are feeling a bit better after talking with her.

Smee - at ds as film critic, given that I always seem to disagree with film critics as to what makes a good film and what doesn't, he could have accidentally hit on a very successful career there!

Gig - I am so glad you are round, hope you are not feeling too ropey. Hope you get to go home in a bit.

Ds's appt was a nightmare, he got very upset and angry, repeatedly attempted to self harm...cried and cried and cried some more...twas very sad, and very difficult, but he needs to go through these things, he has got to develop coping strategies, which let him say, right this is me, now I will get on with living my life....not there yet. [exhausted emoticon needed too]

Will join you on the box for a ....unless we have anything stronger.

gracie excellent that there's no node involvement and clear margins- I think the LVI means vascular involvement - so good there's none of that. Small and quick growing it sounds like to me so chemo will give it a good blasting. well done for getting through that. Got to go but see you later xx

Gracie glad you got results. I was grade 3 too as I think Smee was (am I right?). As Mas says its more to do with speed of growth but sounds like they have a plan. And getting out with margins and no spread is a massive plus as I understand it.
Chemo/rads is the bleach now to complete the cleaning if you like.

Am thinking of you as know I was shell shocked for days post dx.

In traffic on way home - looking forward to apprentice tonight

Gracie, clear margins and lymph nodes is good. Chemo not quite so good but
at the standpoint of being halfway through is doable if not pleasant.

Sparkle - sounds like you and your son are going through a lot but at least he is getting some support and I hope it helps him.

My little school refuser did manage to go into school today and seems to have had a better day. dh and I had a long chat with one of the teachers and we raised several ideas as to why we think he is not enjoying school at the moment. I think it may well be lots of little things that have just built up over the last few weeks. He is going to have some one-to-one sessions with one of the teachers so hopefully may open up a bit more.

Gig-hope you've been sent home and have a good night.

Am just being pushed off the computer by other ds so quickly waves to everyone else.

Just quickly popping in to say hi to everyone. There's been loads of posts recently, once I've finished work I should have more time to keep up!

Smee - well done for taking the bull by the horns and booking your NY trip, hope you have a fabulous time.

Gig - glad you're on the way home, make sure you put your feet up and enjoy The Apprentice. I'll be watching too.

Gracie - just want to say hello, I'm very recently diagnosed too so know how shocking it all is.

Too much has happened since I last posted to reply to everyone, but I'm thinking of you all.

Just had my pre op today, surgery in a couple of weeks so still playing the waiting game at the moment.

Have a good evening xx

xpost gracie - I am glad you have had some positives, and no nodes and clear margins is really positive. Chemo must sound so scary, but you are doing so well.

Loving neds new bag

And thinking pig/dog will not want to come home after the raiding party , he will be having too much fun !

Gracie it may not seem it right now , but your diagnosis is actually quite good news . As daunting as it seems , chemo is do-able . And we can all talk you through that once the Onc tells you what you are having .

Making home made burgers in baps with salad right now , line up if you want one .
Trying to get dinner out of the way before Lord S R'Alan comes on .

Has been so beautiful here today , can't get DD to come back in the house . Have had to bribe her with letting her friend come in for tea (don't mind really , her friend is lovely)

Hmm , G&T anyone ?

gracie Yours sounds like mine - mine was smallish but grade 3, and they got it all out and there was no node involvement. Chemo is definitely the clean up job after the surgery. Like eight said, its hard, but do-able. I'm two cycles in with 4 more to go, then 4 weeks radiotherapy after. Don't think about all the way down the line. One step at a time, OK? I was hoping for grade 2, so I know how it feels - scary, right? Sounds like you caught it really early, and they're going to throw everything they can at it to get you sorted. This is A Good Thing. Let us know what oncologist says on Friday and we can do it all together. Big hugs x x

Evening all, - so many posts, I'm still catching up!
But great to see you have clear margins and no node involvement Gracie, and although all the treatment can seem a bit daunting, as you say the more things they can throw at it, the better - I was also grade 3, - I've never quite fathomed how they grade them.

Gig - so glad you've got your op. out of the way, hopefully it will be able to heal up now- which is brilliant as you must be fed up of the damn thing!

Sorry DS had a tough day Sparkle, - counselling and therapy can be very hard, even for adults, so I can appreciate how difficult it must be for him.
But I'm at him standing over you waiting you awoke to scare you in his ninja mask -genius!

I see we have furry light up ears, assorted masks and luminous clothing (I'm picturing seventies 'Kids from Fame' type outfits) pig dog, (and I'd better bring little old lady dog or she'll feel left out, - and she has a purple hoody she can wear), Smee Junior as the get away driver, and topsy providing the eighties soundtrack - how can we possibly fail? You'd better all turn up early so we can go to the pub beforehand

I'm waving and sending love generally, - have had a busy day, - didn't sleep last night as my back was very sore, like someone was jabbing a knife into me, managed to get up and go to yoga this morning, but it was getting worse so went in to see the doctor this afternoon, and I've got a kidney infection - which I guess explains why I've been feeling so grotty for the last few days. Anyway I have some bright yellow horse pills to take - so hopefully will feel better soon!

Hope it kicks in quickish because I've got things on all day tomorrow too. So will send my good thoughts and love to anyone who has an appointment tomorrow (not sure if anyone has).

Ned - I love your bag, just the kind of style I like, I'm

MAS - so pleased BCN phoned and you are feeling a little better.

xx

x posted as usual.

1step - pre op is another thing done now, your surgery will soon come round, - DX is shocking, and it does take time to regain an even keel. Anything you can do to that makes you feel good or relaxed, even if it's just a nice bubble bath or a hot chocolate, - be kind to yourself

topsy - pig dog can stay as long as he likes, and wear his octopus costume (courtesy of Gig) all the time if he wants to, - but Little old lady dog is very bossy, and she doesn't really do sharing so he'll have to bring his own toys

G&T - yes please, the doctor said I should make sure I have plenty to drink.

Kurri - sorry to hear about your kidney infection, good job you got it checked out, hope you're soon feeling better. Good idea re the bubble bath, in fact I'm going to do that before I settle down to watch TV.

Topsy - home made burgers sound great, I'll be first in the queue :)

Waving to 1step. Pre-op's another one to tick off. Must be daunting to have your surgery ahead, but you'll soon be through and it does get easier once you know what's next.

Gracie, phew as yes that does sound good. Lots of women pre-menopause are Grade 3 - I was told to expect it before they'd even done the biopsy. I had lymph node involvement and I think some signs of vascular invasion too, so you're way ahead of me and I'm still here.

Gig, am hoping you're home and comfy curled up with treats all round. Must be breathing yet another huge sigh of relief that today's over. Onwards to a healed wound v.soon now am sure.

OneinEight, that's good about your DS. Sounds like the teachers are doing their best now. Is he feeling a bit better about it all?

Sparkle, about your DS's appointment. Is he alright now? He must be wiped out, and you too. I think you should accept Topsy's G&T. Sounds like you need one.

Kurri, a kidney infection's mighty ouch. Hope the anti-biotics kick in soon. DS will only come to the crisps with the raiding party if he has his own bag of crisps - nobody's allowed to snitch one. He has a mother with form, so he's eagle eyed.

MAS, hope concert's good and you're back in time for Apprentice. I haven't even seen last week's yet. Must get it on iPlayer if it's still there.

Evening everyone, Just caught up with all the posts before settling down to Lord S'rAlan.

Sorry to hear about the kidney infection KK. Hoping those antibees kick in soon.

Good to hear the BCN got back to you MAS, it's good to talk things through with someone you trust and whose opinion you respect. Enjoy the concert.

Gig, hope you're home now and taking it easy. Thank goodness that's over with and also thank goodness nany turned up today. Hope having a word does the trick.

Super duper bag, Ned. I'd wear it across my body as I find that most comfy and it leaves my arms free.

Gracie, great news there's no node involvement. Chemo certainly isn't a walk in the park but it is definitely doable and will be over with before you know it. A lot of us have had chemo so we'll hold your hand and answer any questions you've got.

Waves to everyone I've missed out - brain's like a sieve and I've forgotten a lot of what I've read.

Went to work this morning but wish I hadn't as had a tough morning while still feeling wibbly but was home at 12.15 so had a lovely rest this afternoon and feel energised enough to walk the dog. I've also brushed him through and he's looking very smart - I hope the sparrows appreciate all the fur I've left them in the garden.

DH is enjoying the Lakes and feels much better today following a massive 8 hour trek through the mountains with his pals. I'm so relieved for him. House to myself again this evening - DS1 at his gf and DS2 at his youth club.

Kk - hope you are resting as kidney infections are the pits.

Gracie- thinking of you.

In the style of hannibal from the a team, "I love it when a plan comes together" as raid is on track .

Figgy- hope easier afternoon improved it.

Gracie- how you doing? Thinking of you.

Home and watching apprentice... Not sure about girls product as not practical. As for the boys, you can pretty much get that for free from our council .

Hi 1st step - glad pre op done, roll on surgery.

Mas how was concert?

I HATE MY INTERNET - it keeps disconnecting, driving me mad.

Think I may send my furry boy along on the raid. He is an absolute star at commando moves and quick snatch, especially if a bonio or dentistix are involved. No cape unfortunately but I could knock one together with two teatowels and some sticky backed plastic. Very good at demolishing things therefore if a quick get away is required, the fence is a goner!

Kurri Hope the horse tablets work quickly. Kidney infections are the pits.

gig Glad your op went well. Hope you are home and tucked up watching The Apprentice.

Topsy That made me laugh about the NI weather. I was amazed it was actually registering 21 in the car which by all accounts is an absolute scorcer by NI standards. We have been known to have all seasons in one day - usually when DH is playing golf :) How did your friend get on with her appointment?

sometimes Thank you again for the candle, really appreciated.

Sparkle :( your son. Thinking of you both.

Big waves to everyone else. Have to do some shopping now before this stupid internet disconnects again.

waving to 1step
figgy glad you had a rest and that dh is having a good time
kk poor love- kidney infection doesn't sound good to me- hope the medicine kicks in fast.
Back in time to watch 3/4 of the Apprentice and You're Fired afterwards.
Concert was really very good- the brass ensemble were fab especially and the New York choir were brilliant- hugely improved from the last concert- the choreography lessons have paid off- bless ds,he is very uncoordinated and out of sync but his voice comes over really well among all those girls.
Aieee though- the nurse that I know,who did my disastrous smear test was sitting a yard away from us- I shall never be able to face her.

Morning all .

Are you from over here gracie ?

Not quite such a sunny start here today , but weather man says it will brighten up a little later .

How are you feeling today kk ? Anti bs kicked in any yet ?

MS friend got the news we thought she would get yesterday , which isn't great . Means she will have to keep a much closer eye on her condition as she is at a greater risk of some weird kind of brain disease

Gotta get DS out for school , be back later .

topsy horrible disease - very sorry to hear that.

Morning all - hope sun shining for you all again today? I have cinnamon bagels and if anyone wants one?

MAS Hope you are OK today? Did chat with BCN help you sleep better? I do hope so. You always have such great words of comfort for us on here, I feel to think of you struggling. Big hugs x

Sparkle Poor DS must be such a draining experience for all of you. Sending you strength and virtual sweeties for the boy x

eight sounds more positive for DS? Hope he feels better - am sure he feels well supported. What have the school put in place to support him? If you don't get the answers you want, drum your heels on the floor very noisily. . .

1step pre op done - tick that one off, well done. When is the surgery? Waiting is the worst bit, I found, so am feeling for you lots. Hope you are keeping busy? hugs x

kurri hope topsy's g&t helped? Kidney infections are so draining, so hope those horse pills have kicked in for you this morning. Restful day for you, I hope? Not too much dashing about.

Figgy, you did that "I'll go to work, even though I am not quite better" thing, didn't you? Hope you can take it easy today, although I suspect that you are at WORK again, aren't you?

topsy sorry to hear about your MS friend. It is such a cruel disease.

Will we need a refreshments for our raid? I don't think we can carry out such a complex design (and size DOES matter when it comes to the Cerne Abbas giant ) without some fbs. Shall I start preparing a list?

Waves to anyone else I have missed x x x x