**TAMOXIFEN 17 **

[MaryAnnSingleton]

blimey- we're almost up to our limit...so brand new shiny,sparkling thread.

Are we all set for Doc Martin in the Bahamas ?
Fbs at the ready ?

How does your DH win all those competitions kk ? Let us know how to enter them , pleeeeeease ?

NK I showered the morning after my biopsy , can't remember if they said I could or not to be honest ! It all sounds really positive for you anyway . How long do you have to wait for the results ?

Smee budge over on the sofa , I have a snuggly blanky and 4 some matchmakers left .

all set for Doc Martin in the Bahamas here

DH is on a competitions website or forum sort of thing (I'll try to find out the details and post them, in case anyone wants to have a go) he enters loads and loads - so it's partly just sheer volume of entries means he's bound to win sometimes, he also enters obscure ones in scientific mags/websites at work - and he quite often wins them as no one else enters!

matchmakers sound good - I'm willing to swap you a slightly fluffy sherbet fruit I found in the glove compartment of the car earlier

Mum tucked up in bed, freezer turned off to defrost and dr martin in the bahamas on the tv. Blown todays calories already so no fbs for me :( unless I go out for some exercise later...

I have a confession to make .
After rads appointment today I called into M&S .
I might have slipped and fell and knocked a bag of large white chocolate cookies into my trolley .
And a creme caramel .
And a 4 pack of chocolate mousse .
And a bag of doughnuts .
And 2 bags of parsnip crisps ...

My name is topsy and I have a problem

at Topsy's fbs! You deserve treats while you are doing rads :) and parsnips are one of your 5 a day so the crisps are really healthy.

mmmm,creme caramel -yum !

MAS snaffled the creme caramel. I'll have a chocolate mousse.

Phew. Enough ice out of Mum's freezer to build a snowman but it's done, turned back on and everything stuffed back in with a couple of loaves of bread for good measure. Quick snack, tamox and bed. Oh and the police helicopter was up over Mum's garden again, earlier, woke her up and she thought it was morning :(

Hmmmm , what is this ?
Pick on people with cancer week ?
Now the BBC news is running an item telling me that it's my fault I have cancer because I'm over weight !
Gah , time to turn off the tv ...

topsy gah,woke up to that too

poor mum jane

at Topsy's FBSs. Bet there's none left now, as well.

NK - I am very glad it sounds like you may have an infection. Not a line i thought I'd ever type, but it is so much better than cancer.

I know what you all mean about the BBC story, but it has given me a kick up the bum just at the point when I was beginning to let my diet slip again. I have gone right off the biscuits that have been calling me from the kitchen.

Bleary eyed here. DH is very over worked and stressed and is having (thankfully) minor anxiety attacks. He can't sleep, he is a bit teary and keeps lurching bolt upright in bed. It has happened before (he was quite bad when i was having chemo, bless him). Tried to stop him going to London today but he said everyone was depending on him and he'd have to go . He's off to New York at the weekend as well I am going out in a bit to get him some Kalms - they take a while to kick in but they are quite good, we have found. I am genuinely worried about him, he'll have a coronary if he goes on like this for long, we aren't as young as we were

Morning all. I'm not going to put the tv on, thanks for the warning!

Oh dear mrcakes. Hope he manages to get some rest time during his travels.

Got Mum up and showered her before the carers came. It's a bit of a performance as I can't use the hoist and Mum can't stand. Have a commode on wheels and somehow I got Mum onto there and wheeled her in. Hair washed for first time in weeks! Bundled her up in towels and back to bedroom for porridge and carers came and dressed her just at the right time. Just had our coffee and toast.

On the bus on the way home from rads .

Jane you are so good doing all this for your mum . Don't forget to look sfter yourself too .

Cakes poor hubby , and poor you ! Hope the Kalms have the required effect . Is the New York trip work or pleasure ? Hope he gets time to relax if it is a work trip .

TV this morning has convinced me to thin out the fbs a bit . Not that yesterdays haul has been eaten ! I had 1 cookie and 1 doughnut . Its so hard though . Damnthem for making food taste so good

Got rained on , sleeted on and snowed on in my 15 minute walk from rads to the bus stop . Let's see what delights wait for me at the other end !
How the Hell did a non driver like me manage to buy a house 15 minutes walk away from the nearest bus stop ???

Glad the rads is over for another day, Topsy. Bad planning on the travel arrangements though.

I'm going to ditch a few more of my indulgences too. Blast. On the plus side, I was worried about alcohol (I do like a glass), and it seems that is less of an issue than I had feared. DH and I drink much, much less than we used to, and are moderate(ish)_now, but I wouldn't like to have to stop altogether, I like meeting up with mates for wine and a chat.

Jane, your poor Mum, it must be so horrid being so dependent and frail. Topsy's right, don't forget yourself in all this.

New York trip is for work, unfortunately. He's planning a trip to Macys though to get him in the Christmas mood, and he may also get to see his brother who lives in the US and will probably be able to make the trip up for a catch-up. DH is a silly old sod, he's like that poor horse in 1984 that keeps going "I must work harder'. I am just hoping he doesn't get carted off for glue any time soon

Topsy, can I join your confessions of fbs circle? I seem to have developed a crunchie bar in anticipation of rads. S*d the articles claiming that we have it because we're not pencil-thin. I know plenty of thin fit people who have cancer and plenty of more cuddly people who don't. If I believed every article about what causes cancer, I'd give up breathing, eating, and drinking anything but pure water straight from a glass bottle.

Hear, hear

yes, everything in moderation is my motto too - balance is all.
Oh poor Mr Cakes - anxiety is so horrible -am sending him calming vibes - do you think mindful breathing might help ?
jane you are amazing - it is a very hard thing to look after elderly old ones and when it's your mum it's very sad and upsetting.
Off to post office to post latest picture-I may be some time

I made the mistake of listening to the news before I logged on this morning. Cancer research UK strikes again - they've got it in for us at the moment haven't they? I suspect government influence - if they can get everyone to say it's you fault if you have cancer, they don't have to put any money into treatment. ,sees conspiracies everywhere, quietly goes mad>

Sorry to hear MrCakes is stressed, - poor chap, I hope he manages to meet up with his brother in New York, - and have a bit of relaxation time.

Jane - so hard for you to cope with your mum, take care of yourself too.

Good luck for rads today amber, well done for yours topsy, - I may reduce the FBS - perhaps I can diet whilst I'm in isolation

I second MAS's suggestion about breathing/relaxation techniques - they definitely help me. Yoga Nidra is good too for a total body relaxation - you can get CD's which talk you through it.

Cakes, your poor DH. My brother is going through similar and SIL is rather less sympathetic than you are. He had a breakdown last year and she told him he was being selfish. Kalms good then? Might recommend.

Jane you're allowed fbs - think of all those calories you used helping your mum.

Amber and Topsy, another day done? Or are you still go to, Amber? Wish you hadn't mentioned crunchies. I want one now. Might have to stumble to the shop..

All maddening and daft. I'm thin and I still got it. Excellent news that alcohol isn't such a big factor though. That's cheering at least. The ones that get me are those Macmillan Ads saying 'Having a bad day?' Always seem to see them when I'm having a fine ol' day and they crash me back to remembering. I do like Macmillan and know they're fab, but still..

Smee at your SIL. My MIL told dh the same thing when he had a bout when I was on chemo. As if they can help it. I am so sorry your brother had a breakdown, that's on a different scale altogether. Terrible.

Kalms do work, but they take a while. They just gently take the edge off it. Worth a go.

Thanks for the suggestions about breathing and yoga nidra, I am going to get him to try. We had a brief go in the wee small hours but he couldn't lie still, kept erupting into a sitting position to try to stave off the panic. I guess we need to go at it more scientifically, I'll look into the CD option. He'll never find the time to go for counselling.

I think it should be written into the cancer treatment plan that FBSs are a must. Most life affirming.

Amber - positive vibes for today's zapping - and hoping your dh is recovering well.

Sorry to hear about your brother Smee - I would imagine a breakdown is a very scary thing to go through.

Cakes -feel free to ignore this as I know its not for everyone, but would he consider AD's? - I was put on a fairly low dose when I had my DX, - it helped me deal with my hospital phobia and general anxiety, - a low dose is sometimes just enough to help you deal with things more calmly.

Oh and can anyone tell me why my dog is sitting beside me making whimpery noises with the odd bark thrown in? She's had a walk, she's been toileted, she's had her breakfast, - what else does a dog need?

I don't think he would, sadly, KK. TBH I think what he needs is to do less work. We are going to see what we can do about that, at least in the short term. He works regular 12 hour days and often quite a chunk of the weekend as well. It's too much.

On the dog front - a cuddle?