**tamoxifen the 13th**

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we are- anticipating halloween

Hooray for return of jane's water

topsy - I second what Cakes said about the sore arm. its the veins. You might find you get dark tram lines up the back of your wrist where they put the chemo in (Its a good look obviously, but it doesn't last ) also my arm went a bit sort of lumpy looking esp. in the fleshy part.
I was advised to rub ibuprofen gel into the arm to help the pain. But yes definitely mention it because you can get inflammation in the veins (phlebitis???) which they'd want to know about.

Have a lovely lunch with your friends

cakes - I think the main cause of my problem is over use,so a RSI - not sure what I've been doing, - don't think its typing because its my left hand, I thought I might have done something to it at yoga. Basically despite the fancy name, its pretty common and is of the same family as tennis elbow/ golfer elbow etc.

Good that the thuglet is keeping her distance, - hope she doesn't cause problems by chumming up with Miss Rude.

Stars, I just saw your other thread about thermometers, I got myself an old fashioned mercury one, - because my digital one started getting ridiculously inaccurate. But you might have to scout around a bit to get one, - I was told recently that they aren't stocking them any more. - It may be different where you live though

Smee - I bet DS loves the builders if they are teaching him to climb scaffolding

Broke here as well, - and we got a whole lot of expensive things coming up, (not hugely expensive but just a bit extra on the monthly budget), I'm also trying to save for a yoga retreat in Spain next year which my teacher is running, - it sounds great, but is quite costly.

A yoga retreat would be lovely, especially in Spain!

Sorry to have been awol for a few days. I have skimmed myself up to date, but will not even attempt to comment on what has gone before.

Hope everyone ok.

You OK sparkles? How is junior sparkles?

Hope you and DC are OK too Sparkles

Retreat is in a Monastery on Mallorca, Cakes, - pictures look lovely, its only 3 days, but I might stay on for a couple of days afterwards to have a look round.
Assuming I can get the funds together of course

Yep we are ok thank you. I followed my ds' style by dislocated my left shoulder on Saturday, but it is feeling much better now....by golly it hurt though.

My little man is ok although he had a melt down in me yesterday, not helped by me having a poor mothering moment , and sobbed about his literacy, and his inability to write. It is such a shame because academically he is doing so well, it is just this condition, preventing him from recording his toughts ad ideas, then we get negative self talk about it, poor kid. I have asked school to use his computer more, and they have asked me to practice letter formation with him, as his previous school had clearly never taught him!!!!!

Ooo Mallorca, I could do wth some of that...... sighs with dreamy expectation.

owww and aww,hugs for sparkles.
Retreat does sound lovely - I vaguely thought about a Mindfulness meditation retreat in France but I don't think I could,really.

Ow sparkles , that sounds painful .
Do you mind me asking about your son and what his condition is ?
It's just that I have a very good friend who has a son with literacy issues (has sensory issues and difficulties holding pencils etc) and the local education authority can fun a laptop for use in school if his work is suffering . and also when he is older he and reaches exam time he can be assigned a person to act as scribe for him .

Sorry if all this is teaching you to suck eggs , feel free to tell me to bog off

Ouch and oh bless. Poor sparkles family, you are having it a bit tough. I am so glad ds is at a new school now, the other one sound so remiss

A monastery in Mallorca sounds wonderful, I hope you can scrape the cash together KK.

Are you SURE you couldn't do your mindfulness thing, MAS? I do know what you mean, ever since I ended treatment I have hankered to go away by myself for a few days and just regroup, but it is hard to justify. But if we really, really want to, maybe we should do these things...

I think I'd just be so anxious about it that it'd defeat the object of the whole thing ! It always looks so joyful and peaceful (hve seen videos from there) -it's even in a bit of France I know from teenage holidays, but the practicalities floor me.Plus expense too. And going away on my own.
Come on garage- tell me my car's ready so I can pick it up- can't settle to any work or hve lunch and am starving...

Poor you Sparkles, - that must have been really painful , hope you're feeling better now.

And poor DS, is he OK as long as he can use his computer for writing? if so, the school should be letting him use it as much as he needs to IMO.

A mindfulness retreat in France sounds lovely too MAS. cakes is right - I've felt the need to get away on my own since I finished treatment, I've had the chance to go on this retreat before, but couldn't justify the cost - it felt selfish to have that money spent just on me.

But this year (probably provoked by DH prancing off to Canada ) I thought why not do something just for me?

Bless you Topsy....I would never tell you to do any such thing! My ds has Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, he has, in the last year, been given a Neosmart, which is a pc compatible mini computer, which works like a keyboard for him as he can't write at all easily. His recording ability is probably that of a reception child, but he is working intellectually at about a year 6 level, he is 8, so he is able, and aware of his difficulties which he finds so frustrating. I will make them assign a scribe if SATS haven't been abolished by the time he gets there!

I understand how the anxiety of going away to France could undo the good work of the mindfulness for you. Tis a shame though, we when can't do these things for ourselves.

X post Kurri - I am so glad you are going to do this thing for you.

Ds is much better when he can use his computer, it is finding a balance for the need for handwriting practice and need to record his thoughts and work.

topsy..i have been left with sore arms due to veins protruding BC nurse told me its because of the chemo she said to raise one arm at a time and massage with e45. warning it bloody hurts honestly im such a wimp.

sparkle...poor you sounds awful glad your feeling better. my son also has the same problem and has the occasional "why me" wobble he also has a laptop he uses at school in a majority of lessons,when the other kids have tests he does verbal ones with someone scribing for him.but with him he dont care about being clever just doesnt like being treated different to everyone else.

smee...my boy would also love the buiders,i would have to watch him like a hawk or he would be up there trying to help/hinder.

kurri...yoga in spain sounds awsome.

mas..hope you get that call for your car soon.

having a very lazy day here in fact still in my pjs,so quiet with the kids being at school. dd has her painting out and snuggled up with the dog she just said to me"thought you was going to do some cleaning" i should move but just might have one more coffee first.

I need to vacuum, but seem to be stuck on here........... anyone!

over here, Sparkles + ouch, how did you dislocate your shoulder?? +poor DS - he does have a tough time. Hope the school can work with you more than the last one did.

Topsy, I got the black vein thing too. It's the drugs burning them as they go in or something. Mine managed to whimper through to the end of chemo, and are fine again now. Hope lunch was decadent.

MAS, what's GBBO?? I am obviously v. far from with it.

Kurri, you've spoilt it by saying wrist thing is common. Yoga retreat sounds lovely. Definitely go for more than the 3 days if you can.

Pink, pyjamas sound like the perfect attire. I quite fancy putting mine back on, but I'm guessing the Polish builders might well think me louche.

Cakes, glad DD's coping with her thuglet. DS is okay with his too, though we did have a whole conspiracy theory going on when he lost his school sweatshirt last week and reckoned thuglet had taken it. His class have gone to The Bank of England today. DS has some idea that they will all be given some money.

Hope Amber, Earth and Stars all good today and that Figgy managed a day at work again x

I was making ds's bed, shook out his duvet and it just popped out! Ds made me smile by telling me his bed was jinxed somehow.....as ever time it has happened recently, he has been in his bed! School are being supportive so far, just haven't been using his neo enough, but hopefully I have fixed that now!

at idea of bank of england giving away money.....if only eh! I hope he has a good trip.

Funny how thugs and thugglets seems to tick together Both mine seem to be oblivious to the presence of any in the school so far.

I am going to vacuum now, it is getting embarrasing.

Ooh, Sparkle. That must have really hurt. I have a dislocating thumb and it's agony when it goes. I have to click it back in. Is that what you did?

Just back from hospital with good news and not so good. Apparently my results show 9 areas of cancer in my breast and 2 in my lymph nodes which were obviously removed.

The not so good? I need both chemo and radium treatment. I'll hear from oncology in the next week or so about this.

He is sure the chest wall is clear though so thats good too. He also says I don't have an infection and can stop the AB's which were making me feel sick.

Thats whats worrying me about chemo, I cannot stand being sick. Honestly though I don't know enough about either treatment so I'll have to look into them.

I asked about the night I had to go back to theater and that I wanted to see my notes. He became a little defensive at this saying "you wouldn't understand whats written down" but he went through his interpretation of that night and confirmed his housemen/women had been at the end of a rocket for how long they waited to summon a consultant.

He told me to write in to the hospital for my notes which I will do.

Nice cup of coffee now, I'm shattered

Earth, am sending you huge hugs. Not surprised you're shattered. Good news about the chest wall though and it sounds as though they think they got it all, which is brilliant news.

hth, but sounds like I was quite similar to you, as had two areas of cancer, lots of signs of change, plus 4/22 nodes. I am now a year past chemo and honestly it feels like it happened to someone else in lots of ways. Chemo's hard work, but it's not forever. Mine took 18 weeks (6 cycles). Hits everyone in different ways, but even if you are sick, there's lots they can do to stop it. Stick with us and let us distract you and ask any and all questions. One of us will probably have a view! x

earth - I can take any amount of blood and gore , but being sick makes me feel awful . My Onc team set me up with a syringe driver at every chemo session . It's a little pump thingy (technical term !) that pumps anti sickness meds into your body over a 24 hour period . I keep it running for 5 days post chemo , the district nurses come out to my house every day and restock it for me .
And honestly , it makes such a difference . I don't even feel slightly queesy . I do feel tired , but thats a small price to pay .
So if I were you I would definitely ask for one of those . The unfortunate thing is they will probably want to let you have the first chemo dose and see how you cope before putting up the syringe driver .
But my team were very on the ball and as soon as I phoned them (24 hours after first dose) and told them I was being sick , they brought me straight in and gave me the driver .

Just back from lunch with my friend . Coconut and lemon grass soup , followed by chicken pad thai . Yum .
Then a little drive round the countryside in the sunshine whilst she dropped some paperwork off .
Then school pick up for DD .

DD doing her homework now . I actually had to google how to spell the word rhombus for her

Any dinner suggestions for me that involve some chicken breasts and a bag of mixed cauliflower and brocolli please ?

sparkle - my friend also says another useful thing for her DS was the school got him a special desk which was more or less completely upright . This gave him core balance which aided his pencil grip .

quickly popping in after collecting car - hooray, but £450 lighter.
Earth it does sound like v good news about chest wall and that they have it all removed- chemo not so good,but it'll get rid of anything nasty and that must be reassuring- loads of support for you on here to see you through it all.

tonight's supper is tuna,anchovy and cannellini bean salad and pitta bread - a standard in our house-I also have some nice baby watercress leaves.
GBBO smee- is The Great British Bake Off !

love to all...think amber may have tried to go to work but had to come home with her cough (MAS snitches)

AMBER (am shouting). I have one stern word for you. SOFA!!

£450 - blimey, that's a lot. Thanks for enlightening me, re: GBBO. Missed all of that. Must try it, or is it all over already?

it's the quarter finals tonight I think, worth a looksee though...