**tamoxifen the 13th**

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we are- anticipating halloween

pink - radiotherapy isn't worrying I promise - the tattoos are tiny pinpricks of ink and don't hurt.

mas...phew thanks for the reasurance, im sorry to hear about your friends son terrible start at a new school,i hope the school sort out the kids involved and with your friends son having aspergers it doesnt havie a lasting effect on him.

mas - that is terrible ! I am hoping that he feels safe enough to go back to school , and that this won't ruin the rest of his school days for him .

stars - ask any questions you want on here , I always do ! I will pop over to General Health and see what I can help with .

Yet again I wrote a big post , and mumsnet ate it !

DC both left for school . Feel like I have had to do a lot of shouting this morning . Think the novelty is wearing off . Being a horrid rainy day doesn't help !

Think I shall have a lazy day today . Feeling a bit headachey .
Anyone got any cake ?

MAS, that poor boy. What a terrible start. Hopefully the school are onto it and will make a real effort for him to feel safe from now on. They do seem to be better at dealing with things than they were when I was that age.

Stars, don't worry about asking things on here. We all have/ do / and will continue to! I will have a think and post on your other thread, but do come on here and chat if it would help. It did help me lots and still does, even though my chemo finished nearly a year ago.

Pressed post before I'd finished. Meant to say to Pink that the tattoo's are teeny and you don't notice them doing them. Ask anything you want to know about rads, but honestly next to chemo it's a breeze.

Figgy, your school sounds lovely. By the sounds of it, you're with the youngest kids? Is that right? Must be interesting to see them all trying to settle in. Not to mention bloody hard work!

Sparkle, how's your DH today? Still need to scream? Hope not.

• Kurri, have those pills done anything yet? Am intrigued, but they sound a bit scary..!

Excellent planning on Smee's part, but we have some nice builders painting the outside of the house. Scaff front and back, so lots of noise, dust and men peering in through windows, wading in to use the loo, etc. I thought they'd be here for two weeks, so finished by the time I was home from hospital, but apparently they'll be here for a week afterwards, which will be while I'm recovering. Excellent..

ps: apparently some women add to their tattoos after rads have finished - they turn the dot into a flower or something to celebrate finishing treatment. So suggestions please. How about a slice of cake?

MAS, heck re the lad and the affray...what a horrific start to a new school. Hope they've got some sort of action plan to get him re-settled after that and deal with whoever thought that was a good plan.

Smee, not totally sure that a tattoo of a slice of cake would be the right thing Now, one of a cup of tea, that'd be fine!!

Morning all. Hope you're starting to feel ok-ish/having a good day. Here, been whizzing around town whilst DS saw a careers adviser. Now have an urge to clear the garage before next week's operation (since we're away at the weekend). Must be feeling more lively. Good.

MAS - I am appalled. That poor boy. I hope the school sorts those little bastards out pronto

Seeing stars: I'l pop to the other thread.

topsy..take it easy i had a few days during chemo where me and the dog curled up on the settee and i just slept.

stars... feel free to ask anything you want,there will always be someone along to help.

smee... not keen on this tattoo buisness lol but then again i wasnt keen on chemo or having an op. oh dear about the builders and heres me going to suggest to let the air get to you wound as much as possible when you get out of hospital, anyway it might work out to your advantage take your wig off and get them to make you cups of tea.

not a good start this morning overslept my boy just does not do rushing and shouting just makes him come to a full stop and nothing in the world no matter how late will interrupt his soak in the bath first thing in the morning. managed to catch up time and he was ready for when his friends called for him phew.

im swollen and alot of pressure in my chest today and a very obvious boob that shouldnt be there not sure i can hang on to see my surgeon tuesday as that seems along way away.will have to see how i feel tomorrow as its kind of been left open if i go in to get it drained again.

amber..i also had a spring cleaning urge before my op,funny that.

Hi, I namechanged a few months ago when my sister was diagnosed with breast cancer and you were all very supportive. Its now out in the open so can post with my mn name. I am going for my mammogram tomorrow. I asked to be referred and the hospital sent me an appointment a few weeks ago. What sort of questions will they ask.? Other than my sister i know for sure that my mum had two aunts one who whom died from bc and one who recovered. Also there is an aunt on my dads side who had cancer (cant remember where).

Hi Lottie, when I've had my mammograms it's been as part of the fast-track diagnosis clinics/follow-ups so there weren't really any questions. Not sure what they ask as standard in the other ones, but possibly others here will know. How it's been going with your sister? Hope all goes ok for you tomorrow...let us know??

they might go through your medical family history including cancer.hope your sister is doing ok,good luck for tomorrow.

Hi Lotte - I too have not had a standard mammo, just part of the fast track dx, but they didn't ask me any questions. I had to have an ultrasound as well, as depending on age the mammo is not always clear, just because of the nature of normal breast tissue. Are you having an ultrasound as well?

Iamseeingstars I have not had chemo, so I am of limited help, but I can say that this thread is for everything....questions about chemo, rads, mammos etc, what to take to hospital, what to expect, and requests for company, calming, and cake....and even the occasional . I will pop over to your thread to get up to speed.

Smee - Eeek builders/painters wanting tea whilst you have your wound out for an airing.....that will scare them. I had plasterers in when ds was 2 weeks old and I was constantly breastfeeding, didn't seem to scare them into getting their own tea at all

MAS I am so shocked about your friends little boy. Tell me it wasn;t an adult tooth?! I hope his parents have contacted the school and asked them to deal with the bullies appropriately! It is dreadful.
Hope ds finally finds out and tell you his RE result, you have been very patient!

Pink and amber I had a desire to cry lots before my op......and I did

Still slightly Arghhhh at husbands, but feel generally better as he has gone to work, and is not here to drive me potty! Ds woke this morning in shed loads of pain in his shoulder again.....I lay awake for hours last nmight fretting about him, and getting more and more frustrated with the rheumatologist. His rheumie is an arrogant twofaced git, but to be honest I am being unreasonable by being frustrated withhim, because even if he was nicer there is nothing more that can be done....other than he could have actually helped with the dla claim.

I have made a fresh and little chocolate sponge cakes, in theory for the dc, but help yourself. I haven't iced them yet, so limited calories!

MAS - poor little lad, how awful, that's very sad. I hope the school make a big effort to settle him in, and make sure nothing like that ever happen again.

Lottie, - welcome back, I don't remember having many questions asked at mammogram, but if they do ask anything it will be about other incidents of cancer in your family, breast and gynae cancers esp. relevant. If and how long you breast fed for, age you had children, regularity of periods (or when they stopped if you're past menopause) any operations/major illnesses you've had. (I was actually asked all this stuff at the breast clinic, but since your mammo is because of your history, they may ask questions - I had to fill in a form with the info)

How is your sister getting on with her treatment?

Iamseeingstars, - it's a while since I had chemo, but if I think of anything I'll post on your other thread - it'll be easier for you to see it all there. Will you be in hospital all the time during your chemo, since it is very intense?

No obvious effects from the tablets Smee, but I slept until noon today, and I feel really tired. That's probably incidental though tablets aren't suppose to have any effect for 2 or 3 weeks.

Sparkle, little buns sound excellent, but I am trying to diet, I will have a though.

Pink the tattoos are tiny little dots so they can line everything up accurately. Not huge anchors with "mother" interweaved In my experience radiotherapists are very nice people, very friendly and reassuring

waves hello to everyone else - I'm trying not to make this post too mammoth.

My mum is having problems with a tree and a horrid neighbour, I'll link to a thread I started about it, in case anyone's interested or has any ideas on what to do.

tree thread I didn't get many replies so if anyone knows about tree laws, I'd be grateful

KK - have added my bit to tree dilemma thread. Eucalyptus trees take a lot of water and aren't good near houses I believe.
Lottie- hope your sister is doing well and good luck with your mammo. I wasn't asked any questions at all - except maybe family history of cancer. I forgot to mention a cousin of my dad's and my brother who died of cancer,but it was all a bit of a blur.
Am feeling a bit as the boy only got a C in his RS module (so part of his gcse,next bit being done in the summer) Actually am disappointed as he usually gets really excellent marks and likes the subject - suspect he is not really putting huge effort into his work at the moment and will have to be a bit firmer. I suppose I have quite high expectations -I don't want to put him off,but I did have to tell him I was a bit disappointed as I know he is capable of much more. Maybe it's a bit of a wake up call for him ? Perhaps that's why he wasn't in such a hurry to collect his results I am curious as to whether he completed it all- he often doesn't get things finished in time. Oh well.

as for yr 7 boy- it's my editor's son-she will have it all in hand I feel sure-.

It is no bad thing to see at this stage what you get out of study for exams depends on what you put in.....maybe he will be inspired to do more, maybe the teaching hasn't been inspirational in itself. A C is still a pass though, so well done junior MAS for that!

Thank you all for the contributions to the tree thread.

I guess it is good to find out more work might be needed before the main group of GCSE's come along, and he's quite young too isn't he for GCSE's? - (I know is changed since mine were at school, they did all theirs at 16)

My DS didn't get brilliant GCSE results (there were a couple of D's in there), but he did get an A for RE, as he said at the time 'That practically makes me a vicar'

thanks sparkle - I just worry- he's a clever boy but does the minimum if he can get away with it (though spends hours doing stuff he absolutely loves !)
My parents put no pressure on me at all- but I was very studious and absolutely loved my best subjects (oddly I did averagely in art) And I got an A in RE

thanks too KK @ your ds (and he has done stunningly well !)

Hi everyone. I have leukemia so will be having intense chemo that kills off everything, and damages all my organs, so will be in isolation for a while. Whilst I accept what is going to happen, the more I read the more scared I am becoming. I hate taking drugs of any kind and it seems your diet is just drugs rather than food. Having recently experienced hospital food it isnt very good for your body.

I feel isolated because I havent personally met anyone else who has experienced this so I cant talk to anyone. I do talk to my friends but I am sure they are getting bored with it all, and they openly admit they dont understand what I am going through. Everyone knows someone who knows someone with cancer, but not within our circle of community. Problem is I look extremely healthy, but top ups of blood, platelets and other fluids is what is keeping me alive. I have withdrawn all my support and participation for lots of different events because I dont know how I feel on the day, and get lots of negativity, because I think they dont really believe I am ill.

Watching this thread has made me realise that life must go on, but I feel that I wont make it through the transplant and this is really worrying me.

Iamseeingstars, - I'm so sorry you are going through this, it is so scary, and there's no great comfort in people saying 'you will get through it all' because when you are going through it you don't necessarily feel that way.

Do you have a partner, or family close by who can support you? - cancer of any sort can be very isolating because as you say no one really understands unless they have been through it themselves.

Are there any cancer support centres near you, or attached to your hospital? I found the one near me very supportive, I also got help from Macmillan - just talking to a Macmillan nurse really helped, she was great.

I am guessing the transplant you mention is a bone marrow transplant? Is the process that the intensive chemo kills off the cells and then you have the transplant? (sorry if I am totally off track). It must be frightening for you, I felt similarly about the drugs, - chemo drugs are so powerful, but I think you just have to try to get through it bit by bit.

Do the people who don't believe you are ill know you have leukemia? - they don't sound very supportive, but I wouldn't worry too much about what they think, you don't need any negativity when you are dealing with all this. Stick with those people who make you feel good, anyone else is just baggage.

There's nothing wrong with feeling pretty pissed off with life when it throws you a curve ball like cancer. People who insist on a constant positive attitude, have probably never had it! I had a good cry or swear plenty of times, - I found it helped to just get that out of my system every so often.

just before I sign off, I would recommend telling your consultant or GP about your worries and fears, they always want to know about these things, and helping you cope psychologically with your illness is just as important as getting through the physical stuff.

take care, much love xx

stars - I have no experience of Leukemia , but I hope I can be of some help .

Firstly , ignore the negative people (easier said than done I know) . Surround yourself with the people who know you best . What is your support system like ?
As kk has said MacMillan are brilliant . They have helped me a lot . They can help with all aspects , from discussing your treatment to financial advice .

If you are going to be in hospital for some length of time you will need things to amuse you . Are you a reader ? I can send you huge quantities of books if thats any help ?

Will you be allowed visitors ? Is there any restrictions on that ? If not , then arrange a rota . Worst thing is having everyone turn up at once , and then nobody the next day !

Don't worry about not being upbeat or chirpy . Sometimes a bloody good rant about how unfair life is , is the only thing you can do .
Cancer is a complete bastard . It isn't fair . It ruins lives . It will change your life completely .

But (a bloody big but) there will come a time when all this will be behind you
The best advice I have been given is to take every stage at a time . Don't keep looking too far ahead . Fight the battles you have now , and don't sweat what might happen .

Make sure you get internet connection in hospital , and keep talking to us . I am a relative newbie on this forum . Only diagnosed mid May . But the women on here welcome everyone . There's no cliques .
Anything we can help with , we will

x