TW - He’s been charged - very very old thread update

[Backandforthandnow]

Hi all, sorry username change as I haven’t been on here for about a year, can’t remember which one I posted under.

There may be none of you here now who remember, but in 2018 I was the victim of a brutal rape, under the guise of niche, violent and sick BDSM. Which I had no interest in and did not agree to.

Over the time it happened, and the years after you guys were here for me, after having the case rejected on very spurious grounds, evidence lost, the rough sex and silly woman thrown at me constantly someone on here referred me to the Centre For Women’s Justice and I really wish I could remember the username of the member but I was traumatised at the time.

Anyway if there are any who remember, with their enormous support all the way, and that of my local MP I have fought this for 4 years.

This week, after review by the independent CPS body, I finally have the validation I’m not insane, complying to survive was not my fault, being hospitalised with various injuries and having months of physio is not the normal outcome of a date.

They have chosen to charge this man with 6 counts.

I won’t say anymore because I don’t want to give any details that could jeopardise, but I do want to say thank you.

It’s a long road from here to remove this man from the streets he shouldn’t have been on for 4 years and there are no guarantees. But from your support hopefully a tiny change will be made in the system, maybe some lessons will be learned.

So if any of you remember then thank you, thank you for being there during one of the darkest moments of life.

If any of you are seeking a charity to support to help women who have no where else to turn then please consider the CWJ because I can’t repay them for all they have given me in practical legal fights but also in kindness and understanding.

Another who didn't see your previous threads, but am in awe of what you have achieved.

I salute you.

Well done, brave woman

Well done to you for finding your strength to see this through all the way. I salute you.

Sending you all the love and best wishes that you deserve OP I don't know if congratulations is the right word but I am so pleased for you.

Wow that’s good news. And incredibly frustrating too. Your MP needs to take this further and get this looked at. What failings along the way. What has that man been given permission by the courts to do since.

Oh you amazing woman - you're incredible.

I was around then but don't remember. We'll done for being courageous. Please be careful though because after all that you do not want to be in contempt of court due to a mumsnet post.

It's so shocking that it's taken so long to reach a guilty verdict. I am so sorry you went through all that. I always think that I would love Mumsnet to have a link to a charity like that so that we could just donate the odd bit of money every now and again. I get so much from this website and I know if I was ever in your position then I would be asking for advice here. I'm so glad you got good advice.

Oh my goodness, hope you are ok after all this time.

Wow! What a strong woman you are. Thank you so much and well done. You have been to hell and back but here you are today standing tall. Fantastic news!

What a story! Heroic of you tonstick the course with such determination, it must have been so so hard. I have just made a donation to the centre for women's justice on the strength of your recommendation. 👍👍

Thank you from all of us for being so strong. X

Your strength is incredible. I, and I’m sure the whole MN community, salute you and your bravery and wish you so much love and happiness for the future. Here’s to you, you amazing woman.

Thank you for coming back. Well done. I wish you peace now.

I am so pleased that the correct verdict was reached.

You are in an inspiration.

Just from what I’ve read on this post, you are amazing. @Backandforthandnow

No one should have to go through what you have, from the original attack to the way you were treated at every step.

Im so pleased that he’s finally been found guilty and that you have been validated. I hope he’s locked up for the rest of his miserable life.

You are an amazing woman and I am so sorry and so angry for what you have been put through. Justice at last. I hope you can now find some sort of closure.

you sound amazing.

You're thanking the woman who signposted you to the CWJ saying that the verdict wouldn't have happened if they hadn't done that, but you need to take credit for your part. I can't imagine the guts you must have to gonthrough a trial where the defence barrister tries to destroy you. Twice.

You have refused to give up and, because of your determination, the streets will be safer as this despicable creature will be locked up.

I am so sorry you have had to go through this.

You’re amazing. I thought the worst when you didn’t come back so I am pleased that eventually it went in the right direction.

I'm so glad you finally had a guilty verdict. Please do let us know the sentence.

🩵

Well done, you’ve been incredibly tenacious and finally justice is being done. I’ve donated to CWJ.

That is so good to hear.

Your persistence and courage are an example to all.

I hope this will make a difference to you. Recovery is a long slog and can sometimes feel like two steps forward and one step back, or even three steps back.

Wishing you every good thing.

You are amazing!

I’m so glad they found him guilty and so sorry you have had to go through so much to get that verdict.

Please remember that, while you needed to do this for yourself, you have also helped all other women who could have become his victims without this conviction. Thank you.

This has obviously been a huge part of your life, given the initial incident, the police involvement, battling with CPS, trial and retrial. It is understandable that will carry over into the future. But don’t let it define you. You have handled everything marvellously but there is still so much more to you. Make this a minor event in your life and live bigger and better than ever before.

I'm in awe at your strength and tenacity. I wish you for the coming court case

Oh my goodness, what an ordeal you have had. You are amazing. Guilty. Him, and the system that has put you through this. Thank you for everything you have done.