TW - He’s been charged - very very old thread update

[Backandforthandnow]

Hi all, sorry username change as I haven’t been on here for about a year, can’t remember which one I posted under.

There may be none of you here now who remember, but in 2018 I was the victim of a brutal rape, under the guise of niche, violent and sick BDSM. Which I had no interest in and did not agree to.

Over the time it happened, and the years after you guys were here for me, after having the case rejected on very spurious grounds, evidence lost, the rough sex and silly woman thrown at me constantly someone on here referred me to the Centre For Women’s Justice and I really wish I could remember the username of the member but I was traumatised at the time.

Anyway if there are any who remember, with their enormous support all the way, and that of my local MP I have fought this for 4 years.

This week, after review by the independent CPS body, I finally have the validation I’m not insane, complying to survive was not my fault, being hospitalised with various injuries and having months of physio is not the normal outcome of a date.

They have chosen to charge this man with 6 counts.

I won’t say anymore because I don’t want to give any details that could jeopardise, but I do want to say thank you.

It’s a long road from here to remove this man from the streets he shouldn’t have been on for 4 years and there are no guarantees. But from your support hopefully a tiny change will be made in the system, maybe some lessons will be learned.

So if any of you remember then thank you, thank you for being there during one of the darkest moments of life.

If any of you are seeking a charity to support to help women who have no where else to turn then please consider the CWJ because I can’t repay them for all they have given me in practical legal fights but also in kindness and understanding.

You are an amazing and inspirational woman. I'm so sorry the system failed you for so long but you are in my thoughts to day and I am praying for the best possible outcome 💐

Thank you, I’m just edgy and feel sick. Need something brainless to do. I’m not in court, can’t stand it so trying to work and making a piss poor job of it.

Thank you. I hope the verdict is the right one.

I remember your original thread, I think. You are amazing for having the strength to pursue this. I hope you get the verdict you deserve.

Oh I wish you ALL the best

I remember your original thread too. What an incredibly brave woman you are. I hope that the jury comes to the right decision.

You are incredibly brave. Keeping everything crossed for the right verdict today. 💐

You are amazing, whatever the outcome. I have everything crossed for you

Oh goodness I’m keeping everything crossed for you. Thank you again for your bravery and determination. I hope the verdict comes soon as I can’t imagine what it feels like waiting. Love and strength to you.

Best wishes for the outcome you deserve OP. Will keep my fingers crossed for you.

I also think I remember your original posts.

I hope the jury deliver the right verdict, but regardless you have been absolutely amazing. I was, at the time and still am, in awe of the strength you had to keep on fighting for justice.

You are an incredible woman and I thank you on behalf of all of us now and all of us to come for fighting so hard and so tirelessly.

Can you tackle a really big job that's all consuming and you've been putting off??

I recently got everything out of my wardrobe and dumped it on the bed for a huge Vinted / charity clear out. Once you've committed to that you've got to keep going and it might take your mind off it.

I can only begin to imagine how you must feel at the moment. I hope that knowing the love and good wishes that are flooding your way from MN (and no doubt elsewhere) give you some comfort, as you wait.

Prayers for the tough sentence this animal deserves.

Thank you so much for following this through. It is dreadful that the authorities made it so hard for you.

Having been there, I know how hard it is to try to distract yourself while you wait for the verdict; the waiting is horrible. I'm really hoping you get the right outcome.

Wow you're a brave lady.
Thinking of you 💐

Thinking of you and keeping fingers crossed for the right verdict.

It makes me furious that even in this day and age women are belittled and not believed in rape cases. With amazing women like you, hopefully lessons are learned within the system and more animals like these men are behind bars where they belong. Thoughts and prayers with you. Thankyou from me a woman and for my daughter. Im failing to find the words to express how in awe I am of your strength and tenacity for 4 years. 💐

Thank you all, jury won’t be back in today now, it’s too late, so not looking forward to the night ahead at all.

its awful just waiting for a text or call, knowing that there will be a delay of god knows how long before I know, even after the jury is in as I’m not there.

I could go, you are allowed but there is no protection, I’d be hanging around the concourse with the bloody man. I don’t think people realise this. You can be protected for your testimony, but then unless you are willing to just be a part of the public gallery and entrance in and out, with the perpetrator if they aren’t on remand (he isn’t) you cannot watch the rest of your own trial, you know nothing. It’s just wrong, so so wrong.

anyway sorry rambling. It’ll be tomorrow at some point, good idea of @FusionChefGeoff I’m going to find a project!!!

The other thing people don’t realise is that defence barristers are allowed to lie and make things up.

ACTUALLY LIE, with no evidence whatsoever, on the vague hope that some of the lie will stick in a jurors head to create just that tiny doubt that they need. It blows my mind. I’m not talking undercut your testimony with nuances they can pick at, I’m talking actual lies.

@Octomore I hope yours went the right way x

It did. The process was horrific (understatement), but at least he ended up serving time.

Fingers crossed for you.

Backandforthandnow: you’ve been so BRAVE - thank you! Do you have to leave court alone, is anyone with you?

I think most people would be shocked by what the defence are allowed to say and imply in court.

If this man is convicted though, the fact that his defence tried every possible avenue in court will mean he won't be able to find grounds for appeal.

OP just to say I am in awe of your bravery and thinking of you. Whichever way this goes, you have made a difference. You have made the system think and act where there was inertia. You are an amazing woman.