Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Original poster

You can do it!! (Jane Fonda style motivation thread!!)

252 replies

QueenFlounce · 17/06/2005 21:55

Following on from the massive "Going to have a good week" thread...

Sax - Calling your boy a "Stupid child" is NOT an example of a complete failure as a parent! I'm sure many many Mums here will admit to doing that even without a hint of depression! THEY ARE STRESSFUL! Especially with everything else you have to put up with.

I can't comment on the drinking coz I know I drink FAR too much..... I hide behind the "But I'm Scottish!" excuse alllllll the time.

HOWEVER, what I will say is that if drinking makes you feel even more low then its something you need to reconsider as a way to unwind and de-stress..... coz it's not working if you just feel shittier.

Come on, its Friday night... we're all drinking... lets have a bit of escapism from reality for a while and step back.

This is bad moment..... it doesn't mean tomorrow will be awful... or that your children will never forgive you for saying that. It just means that by the end of today you felt really stressed.

As for the work thing. Bringing up 3 young children, one with a condition that makes him even more hard work is you contributing to your family! Debts can be paid off when you feel stronger..... as long as they are not spiralling out of control then a couple of months is not going to make that much difference, is it?

Remember.... UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM I aaaaaaaamm caaaaaaaaaaaaaalm.

OP posts:
Toothache · 26/07/2005 12:19

Hiya Meeely2 - What time is/was your appointment??!?!? Let us know how you got on!

Meeely2 · 26/07/2005 14:48

well I've been and gone now. Feeling more positive I think. Wasn't diagnosed with out and out PND, more stress and slight depression caused by stress. I have been referred to the local psychiatric dept of the mother and baby support group to discuss my feelings of anger at times and my HV has been informed so that she will get in touch to talk about me, my babies and my routine to see if anything can be adjusted to relieve the stress at weekends.

Weird having opened up now, and having someone listen without having a frown on their face thinking, this chick is tapped!

They will be in touch soon, so i'll let you know how that goes....remains to be seen if DH will enquire how things went or if he will just hope that it all goes away quietly with the minimum amount of fuss and disruption to his day.

Anyway, thats my update - toothy how are you?

Sax · 29/07/2005 07:42

Hi folks,

Well heres a change! I thought I'd post on here and tell you all having had a pretty bad bad week I hope to be finally on the up. Well, if you look at the time and all boys and me are washed and dressed, sitting here now with a cup of tea and not dreading the day

So, why the change - errrr well how about an alcohol free night, an earlier night and some quite a bit more sleep (i've been running on 3hrs a night) so hopefully if keep this up i can actually look forward again!

Sorry for being a bit quiet on here, i am thinking of you people but i didn't want to constantly come on and be in the gutter!

So, guys how are we all. Toothache, hows things going with you - is dh and you any less strained and how are you feeling? (i'll check the other thread as well in case you post on there).

Babynovice, I hope to chat with you today, I'm so glad you and Meeeley are now on Msn so we can speak in the day sometimes. I hope the nursery with dd went ok, looking forward to hearing.

Meeeley, hope dt is less sicky and hope you are having an ok day if you are at work.

I hope everyone checks in soon, sending you positive vibes from this end and stick with it all chaps - cos its a good feeling when you finally have a positive day

Take care, hope Goss is having a good break! and that everyone else here are doing alright.

babynovice · 30/07/2005 15:21

bump - is there anyone there?

jabberwocky · 02/08/2005 12:58

Sax, good to hear you're doing well. I have thought of you lately as I've been having my own "wobble". I had hoped it wouldn't happen but here we go getting closer to ds's birthday and I'm falling apart again. (My PND was/is actually PN PTSD but it's just usually to lengthy to go into, so I don't)
Have upped my meds and feel that I should follow your example with alcohol free, earlier nights. Dh agrees btw.
Poor ds, I don't want him to have a mommy who falls apart on his birthday every year! How's that for something to send a child into therapy...

Sax · 02/08/2005 17:56

Ahhh Jabberwocky, i'm so sorry to hear you aren't so good at the moment! My thoughts are very much with you and your continued support of others is amazing , hang in there! hopefully your increased dose will kick in and the emotions won't be as heightened!
take care and thank you for keeping checking up on me, you are kind.

Sax xx

Meeely2 · 03/08/2005 10:24

Hi all

DT1 stopped sicking - gaviscon seemed to work hoorah, new routine working a treat, eating all their food and sleeping solidly from 7.30 - 6am - bargain!

I had a fab weekend with MIL, so chilled out, went shopping, bought the boys new highchairs, bought me some clothes, was great. DT2 had a dose of the runs due to teething, you should have seen the state of him, had to hose him down in the bath which he thought was hilarious!

Me and DH been ok too surprisingly, but I'm still feeling very low. Got the Health Visitor tomorrow, although I have now sussed my daily routine, it will still be nice to talk to someone. Got my referral appointment on the 21st September - seems ages away, hope things don't deteriorate too much before then.

Don't know whats causing my low feelings now though - at least before i kinda had a reason, boys playing up, not sleeping, DH being an arse, but all those things have stopped or are stopping, but still feel like kicking the sh1te out of something the minute I bang me toe, drop something, knock me head...it's weird. Last night I was washing the bottles up and as I was putting them out to drain they kept falling over, I lost it, threw them all over the kitchen. Then as I was going upstairs to check on the boys I banged my foot on the door - I slammed the door as hard as I could and let out a shrill scream (!! are you all scared yet?)....this morning I was getting Edward into the buggy and I banged my head on the car door, flipped out and swore at the door (??). I feel really odd, like I'm only just holding onto reality, sometimes I drive to nursery and don't remember any of the journey, I'm in a complete haze, it's like I have so much to remember on a daily basis that my brain is just shutting down....

Please tell me one of you feels like this sometimes? Am I mad?

jabberwocky · 03/08/2005 15:12

Oh, yes absolutely I do that sometimes. I'm lucky that dh has learned to stay calm or else I don't know what would happen since I'm such a mess during those times. It happens most often when I am overly tired. (with twins do you ever not feel tired - just curious)

Hope things get better. Can you nap when they do?

Meeely2 · 04/08/2005 15:42

I work full time, so no napping for me! They sleep through now, so I just need to learn to go to bed earlier and make the most. They only nap for 20 mins/half hour each time anyway, think I'd feel worse if I slept then, not good at cat naps, I need my 8 hours a night.

Things are improving, i've been working from home today and boys at nursery, so got some peace and quiet and got a few chores done, but I'm sooo tired, feel like dropping off.

I better do some more work, got just over an hour before I go fetch boys.

jabberwocky · 04/08/2005 21:12

Maybe add in a good hour or so nap on days like today? I've learned that nothing else can take precedent! Laundry, dishes, etc. can all take a backseat to sleep.

Meeely2 · 05/08/2005 09:55

I'm at work though jabbywocky, not sure my boss would take too kindly to me snoozing on me desk!

Boys are sleeping fabulously at night though, so I just need to go to bed earlier! Tis my own fault for mis management of sleep and feeling Big Brother is more important!

babynovice · 08/08/2005 21:34

Sax, just wondering how you are? You're a bit quiet these days I hope all is OK? Let me know how you are doing and it would be great to hear from you if you would like to chat

Sax · 10/08/2005 01:38

Hi all, Meeeley and basketcase its lovely to be speaking to you intermittenely in the day. I'm doing alright as you both know and hoping you guys continue to do so too.

TOOTHACHE how are you hun, not heard from you on here for a bit so sending hugs and hoping all is alright and keep in touch please.

Miss you

Sax xxx

Sax · 10/08/2005 01:39

Sorry error, meant babynovice, reading wrong thread sorry BN !!!!

HappyHuggy · 10/08/2005 01:50

hey missy - why arnt u in bed?????

love and light - catch you soon

((((((((sax))))))))))

Sax · 10/08/2005 03:31

STill here huggy wish i could sleep mate! Anyway take care you

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sax

Sax · 20/08/2005 13:26

Hi all,

I just would like babynovice to check in and tell me how you are doing cos i'm worried since we spoke the other day and you were having such a dreadful day.
I fully appreciate how those days are and they are so hard to accept aren't they.
I hope things are a little easier for you and that you may find time to tell me how you are today.

Sending you big hugs and thoughts and catch up with you soon.

Sax xxxx

jabberwocky · 23/08/2005 06:47

Hey, Sax, have been looking around for you lately. how are things? Feel free to CAT me anytime.

Sax · 05/09/2005 14:10

Just wondered if babynovice is still around on MN and if so are you ok also toothache/QF hows u at the moment too??????? (smile)

I miss u guys so just trying to catch up with everyone if you are around!

Sax xxxxxxxxxxxx

babynovice · 06/09/2005 21:15

Hiya Sax, I haven't really been on MN much recently so I'm just checking in. I tried to get you on MSN for a wee chat but you're not around so I'll say a quick 'hi' and I hope you're doing OK.......maybe we can catch up soon?
I'm still on the PND rollercoaster I'm afraid but on the whole things are OK

Toothache · 07/09/2005 08:50

Sax - I've been away since last Thursday (visiting the Inlaws). But I'm back now! How are you?

I'm not too great. DH and I still not getting along. I have no patience and neither does he. We just rub each other up the wrong way all the time and we both seem to be lying in wait to take offence at the slightest thing.

I'm actually starting to think the Mirena coil is affecting my moods and panic attacks. I was fine up until about 2 or 3 months after I had it fitted then I just seemed to stop coping as well..... have become really irritable, angry, tired and feel generally run down. I'm going to speak to my GP about it anyway. Hopefully things will improve soon.

Hope things are better for you. And for everyone else on here!

northerndad · 07/09/2005 09:46

Hi
just glanced at this thread as liked the title. I maybe shouldnt comment on here, being a bloke and all, but my ex wife had problems after being on a contracepive injection every six months. She ended up on AD's, something to do with estrogen?
I was working away at the time and knew nothing of it. she only told me about 2 years after divorce.
oops...this was supposed to be motivational...erm...yeah, sort it out now and speak to him, anything, safe but not boring.
Sax, good to see youre around, and as a ten year lone parent I am stiil happy, hopeful and will never give in. Ex and I get on better than ever now.

Toothache · 07/09/2005 10:15

Thanks NorthernDad! Its really good to have a male perspective on things.

northerndad · 07/09/2005 12:03

Dont hear that very often.
I should have added that we both admitted long after that we had still loved each other but were too stubborn to be bothered. You can get through to each other I'm sure, be ready to get your head bit off, give space but dont give in.
You can do it!!

Meeely2 · 07/09/2005 13:45

Hello people - Got my HV apt next week and pnd assessment the week after. Things have been OK ish I'd say, ticking along, boys have more good days than bad, hubby trying his best to understand me and i'm sleeping, so all in all, not such a bad deal.

I still have panic stricken days where I don't see how I can possibly get everything done, then DH steps in and takes 1 or 2 chores off me, so he's not all bad!

Been very quiet on here - I chat to sax on MSN occasionally and she sounds upbeat - hope we all start on the road to recovery soon.....long live mummies, we are the best!