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Mental health

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Original poster

A new thread for stressedmummy

562 replies

soapbox · 11/05/2005 22:05

...

OP posts:
Ulysees · 13/05/2005 22:07

veg a roma with pineapple but it's goin fast!!!

stressedmummy · 13/05/2005 22:09

I had a dodgy frozen pasta meal!

puska · 13/05/2005 22:09

oops forgot to say hi to rickman

i agree you were very brave did you any family/friends to support you?

Original poster
soapbox · 13/05/2005 22:09

Rickman lives in Maidstone.

OP posts:
Ulysees · 13/05/2005 22:10

only 2 pieces left but it was only a medium

off to fridge now for vino

stressedmummy · 13/05/2005 22:11

Just over an hour or so from me!
Was it tough rickman? Did he hassle you a lot after the seperation?
How are things now?

puska · 13/05/2005 22:12

ooooh pineapple - my favourite is cheese & tom with pineapple and sweetcorn....

c'mon sm its friday night - has to be take out! i went to the chinese and splashed out on a bag of chips with curry sauce - classy bird me!!

Original poster
soapbox · 13/05/2005 22:12

SM where are you in Kent????

OP posts:
stressedmummy · 13/05/2005 22:13

Ilove a nice king prawn curry with chips from the chinese!

stressedmummy · 13/05/2005 22:13

Cannot say exactually, but near Dover.

rickman · 13/05/2005 22:13

Message withdrawn

Original poster
soapbox · 13/05/2005 22:14

Oh! Even further from me than Rickman then!

OP posts:
rickman · 13/05/2005 22:16

Message withdrawn

puska · 13/05/2005 22:17

i can remember constantly being told i was a 'looney' by my ds father - clearly i am not - although you'll have to take my word for it!

rickman · 13/05/2005 22:18

Message withdrawn

Original poster
soapbox · 13/05/2005 22:18

Maybe we should have a mini meet up to discuss sh*te husbands

OP posts:
Ulysees · 13/05/2005 22:19

I'm oop north and never been to Kent. Will do one day though. A close mate used to live in Canterbury so may go there with her eventually for a visit. They charge a mint to go in the Cathedral apparently?

puska · 13/05/2005 22:22

ooooh - wine really kicki8ng in now!

can we go to Leeds castle - can we, can we... pleeeease............

stressedmummy · 13/05/2005 22:22

The thing with me is that ds1 seems to love his Daddy so much, despite everything.
I do not talk a lot to friends about things, but one friend admitted to being scared of my H & she does not see much of him.
I am kind of plodding along & have been for a while now.
I go to most parties or functions without him, because he does not want to be included in such things & it is easier for me.
I try & make out to people that I have a nomalish life, because that is what I want to have.
I think TBH, that even my parents tip-toe around my H, because they can see a lot of what he is like for themselves, but they never say much to me.

stressedmummy · 13/05/2005 22:24

I love to go shopping in Canterbury!
A meet up would be great!

Original poster
soapbox · 13/05/2005 22:25

Oh SM! If your experience is anything like mine - wait until you finally split up and you will be astonished to find out what your parents have been thinking all this time

Of course you want to be a happy family and you will be - it just won't be with this saddo!

You will find a peaceful and happy place for you and the boys - and all of this will be worthwhile in the long run!

It is also worth remembering that your DH (sadly in my eyes) will always be a part of your DS's lives. Only he can screw that one up!

OP posts:
puska · 13/05/2005 22:25

sm - it sounds like to me that you have already done the hard work - you are already going everywhere alone - i am guessing that no-one would be surprised by your news.

i know you are worried about the financial side but you will get help with WFTC etc..

Ulysees · 13/05/2005 22:26

My mate from canterbury is the one I mentioned earlier. You'd like her.

What is it about H that scares everyone?

rickman · 13/05/2005 22:28

Message withdrawn

Original poster
soapbox · 13/05/2005 22:28

ALso SM - you can't use your DS's almost preconditioned 'love' for his father as an excuse not to do something!

Love is twisted and tortured at times - most of us in abusive relationships know that. It isn't fair that your DS thinks that what he feels for your DH is love! It isn't - it isn't at all!

Please give him the chance to know what real love for a father figure is - to have someone cherish and mentor him into adult hood. Your DS is a victim of child abuse - and it is not fair of you to allow that to continue!

I know that sounds harsh but it isn't any less true for all that!

OP posts: