Gone mad?

[Yesterdayschippaper]

I've reached out to crisis , I've lost my mind , can I write here ?

Yes, what’s happening? Xx

It may help to share your worries, or off load here. Bear in mind we will not be qualified to give advice, but may be able to give some pointers.

I'm hearing voices about stuff that happened years ago , the voices are shouting and taunting me ,I feel deranged, my doctor gave me numbers to call ,most didn't work, no one is helping , I've been waiting for days , I've got some tablets for sleep and blood pressure , I can't process all the badness and recently I got in trouble with the police and I can't be a wife or a mother anymore , I'm out of control and I'm not coping, is it okay to write here ?

Of course you can , we are listening if you want to talk about it ?

Yes, you can write here. As someone above said we might not have the answers but we are good at listening.

Is anyone with you, is your husband at home, how old is your child. We can talk with you but would you feel safer and more settled in hospital.

I woke up in a room years ago , locked in , I escaped through a window I managed to get home , my clothes were ripped and torn , I had bruises and cuts , I scrubbed my skin until it bled and washed it down the plug hole, the voices are still with me , I'm fat I'm ugly and no good , not a good human being , they tell me to go to bridge and jump or see a view , I see dirty water , maybe I should jump into it , I have asked for help and seen so many people this week but still no help , the telephone numbers don't even work sometimes

Yes my child is safe in bed I put them there , my husband is here too , I'm safe , I've had some medication I have water and clean clothes , it's just the voices are loud , I even did the school run today which got me out , but I'm not making sense and the voices are so shouty and loud and negative and awful

I didn't think real people were here , thank you people for being here , I appreciate that , someone is here. Can you believe that some of the mental health helpline numbers don't work it's goes to a dead line , I mean how does that happen when someone really needs help , last Friday I dialled six numbers and got passed from one to another and eventually hung up on , without my husband then I'd be gone

We're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Mental Health webguide - it has numbers and contact details that you may find helpful.

Very best wishes from all at MNHQ

Thank you I will look at that , am I allowed to still talk and write here ?

I’m so sorry, mental health services are in a very poor state. You can call 111 option 2, have you tried that?
I hear voices and see people too, it’s very distressing. You can go to A and E and they will make sure you see a MH worker if that’s an option?

Yes I called 111 option 2 a lot last week and they kept referring me to other numbers but nothing worked at the weekend ,a doctor came to my house yesterday but said I want right for their team to refer me back to someone else who might contact me in a few weeks ?

@ninjahamster are your voices cruel to you?do they make you do bad things ? I obey them as I'm scared of them , the doctor says it's my voice but I know it isn't

Yes. They tell me to do bad things. I’m under the MH team and they’re trying to figure out what to do.

@ninjahamster have they been there for years , mine have and lately they've gotten louder and louder and I'm terrified , if I don't do what they tell me I don't know what will happen. Have the mental health team helped you yet , how long did it take , what can they do ? I'm scared of being locked up

What doctor? You need to see a qualified psychiatrist not just a gp. It sounds like you're having a psychosis, are you currently on any antipsychotics? If yes, have you taken your medication? If no, can somebody bring you to a and e so you can get seen to promptly? I know it's scary when reality seems unreal but there are treatments for this. You urgently need psychiatric help. If you can't go tonight then take one of your sleeping pills and go tomorrow. ❤️

I’ve had them for a few years. They were much quieter when I was on antipsychotic medication but my psychiatrist has taken me off them. He says I can’t go back on them. Mine tell me to hurt people. I have to do a forfeit of if I don’t do what they say.
I have been sectioned a few times. I’m so sorry you are going through this. It’s awful and getting help is so difficult.

@arcticpandas I'm not on any medication , a mental health doctor came to my home yesterday , she didn't give me medication she said I want right for her team and she reffered me to the people I saw thr day before , single point access. I have tablets for sleep a d blood pressure from my GP. I know I'm in a lot of trouble from my past

Hi 👋
sorry to hear you are experiencing horrible voices.
the voices can’t hurt you, it’s a trauma response but she shouldn’t be left to suffer with the voices
can you get husband to ring NHS 111 again for you - he should tell them you are really struggling and things have got worse
then can you gently have a little bit of something to drink / a snack if it’s been a while since you’ve had something to eat
where in the house do you feel safest ? In bed ? On the sofa with a blanket ?
try and get as cosy and safe as you can -
not because the voices can hurt you, just because you need comfort and support and to feel safe
sometimes a gentle movie,like an old favourite Disney or something can help to soothe, just having something like that in the background, snuggle a cushion, put headphones on whatever helps

you do need proper support and medication as soon as possible and the voices and the distress will get better with time and the right treatment

and it’s really important to try and get some sleep x

You are suffering from psychosis symptoms. It must be terrifying and horrible to experience. When you have called 111, what have you told them? A psychosis is considered a mental health emergency and you should be seen to in the same way you would be if you had broken your legs. Where abouts in the UK do you live? Can your husband call 111 and explain things for you? The mental health hotlines are awful for answering, I've been there myself – breathing space, samaratins etc. Had a hard time getting anyone to answer.

@Bumdrops thank you , I had dinner earlier , I'm in bed , it's safe , 111 option 2 don't do anything , they ended the call last week anyway , best not to bother them. My husband is here , I'm safe , I have clean clothes and bedding and I'm warm. I have to face the police again in a few weeks so the voices are shouting about that too , telling me how bad I am. They say the rape years ago was my fault , shouldn't wear short dresses. I think my drink was spiked I would never go off with any men , even so long ago , I don't really drink alcohol ever either

Have you ever seen a psychiatrist and been diagnosed with a mental illness, it sounds very distressing for you at the moment and think you should go to hospital for an assessment and hopefully treatment.

Thank you everyone , I've done loads of assessments this week and answered million questions , I think you just have to wait for help and it's gonna take ages and I'm in so much trouble and the voices are so loud. And I told the police I don't have mental health problems but I know that I do secretly but didn't want anyone to know , the voices said to keep quiet and not say

Samaritans answered the phone , I spoke with John , he was kind , he said he may call me in 7 days which will be tomorrow , I hope he does