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Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Mental health

Would anyone like to join me on a self-help thread to get out of a rut and feel happier?

146 replies

Janni · 29/04/2008 14:21

I am not happy. I know there are lots of things I could/should do to feel happier eg eat better, do more exercise, make an effort with friends, get out of the house more...but I'm in a rut and feel a bit defeated.

I had the idea of using this thread to post each day a few things we could each do to make ourselves feel better then report back,
encourage each other etc.

Any takers?

OP posts:

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whispywhisp · 09/05/2008 13:12

I only hope she has had a better day today otherwise she'll be ill over the weekend - the condition she has is triggered by stress and worry.

readytoswiggin · 09/05/2008 13:20

Sounds more and more like envy at your dd because your dd has a nice homelife and parents that care, and all the thuggery is a cry for attention.

Easier said than done but if you continued doing 1-2-1 reading with this child perhaps you could manipulate the reading round to anti-bullying talk?

feel for the other girl as well as your dd. Hope she has a good day too, sending you good vibes.

scattyspice · 09/05/2008 18:51

Life is so tough for some kids .

Can your DD get by by avoiding her?

scattyspice · 09/05/2008 18:52

We have started a new star chart (another one). This time its no shouting, and I'm on it too! If we get 7 stars we all get a comic! Wish me luck!

whispywhisp · 10/05/2008 09:06

Yea DD could avoid this other girl - only problem is DD is very good friends with another girl who feels sorry for the girl who threatened DD so its a case of '2 is company, 3 is a crowd'.

muttonbird · 10/05/2008 10:22

Hi all.

Good luck with the star chart Scatty, hope you've decided which comic you want!

I failed dismally at my "not getting cross" aim yesterday, and had ds telling all who would listen that I was a stinky mummy and he wanted to go and live somewhere else.... Will try harder today!

Whispy I hope the teacher's talk next week puts a stop to the bullying; must admit I'm dreading having to deal with that sort of stuff esp. as I too suffered from it when I was about 10.

All the best for the weekend everyone.

readytoswiggin · 10/05/2008 20:26

lol at scatty gettinig a comic!!! and at muttonbird being a stinky mummy...how old is ds?

I half succeeded, but didn't give ds the time he deserved. there were several times he asked me to come out into the garden and see what he's been doiong, and I was giving him the classic in a minute, when I've peeled these spuds etc. Must try harder.

On the plus side I got my mammoth heap of ironing done, and am really pleased with myself for that. I shall igmore the beginnings of a new heap that is due to come in off the line.

Tis just my luck, I finally decide to bite the bullet and get dd1 new nappy wraps and she then decides she doesn't want to wear them anymore, but likes the idea of weeing on the lawn

Hope everyone else's weekends are going ok.

whispywhisp · 11/05/2008 11:42

Oh dear...not a good day today. DD told me this morning she's scared about going to school tomorrow. I'm worrying about her. I'm down myself which doesn't help. Fed up with being stuck at home so much. Can't wait until DD2 starts school this Sept but she won't go full-time until November. I've had a moan at DH this morning because I want to go back to work and miss having a good well paid job but with no help/support from family the chances of me being able to hold down a good job are years ahead of me. I miss working. I gave up such a brilliant job which I loved and paid well to have DD1 9yrs ago. With DD2 only being 4yrs old I can't see myself going back to work for another ten years other than working the odd few hours here and there and having to have an understanding employer who will allow half-terms, teacher trg days, sickness days etc etc off.

Oh well. Never mind.

VaginaShmergina · 11/05/2008 22:27

Whispy, sorry to hear DD1 afraid of going to school tomorrow.

Will be interesting to see if her tummy flares up again wont it ? This needs to be stopped now otherwise your gonna have a little girl who is not gonna get thru those school gates.

Do you think she could be involved on some level with any meeting with the Head or her teacher so she can express hersle (I know she is shy, but maybe, just maybe she would open up)

Come on you, you were doing so well this past week or so, doing your walking and shifting some weight. Keep those endorphines speeding round your body then you can lay the Head, Teacher and maybe DH out flat !!!

Off to bed, but try and catch you in the morning.

Tomorrow is the beginning of a new week, set yourselves a small goal (Mine is to not eat everything in sight !)

whispywhisp · 12/05/2008 07:39

Hiya Vag. DD is too shy to talk to her teacher/the Head...and tbh they don't seem too bothered about the problems she is experiencing. I'm going to try and let DH take her to school a couple of times this week, providing he can because he quite often leaves before they've even got out of bed, or I might ask a couple of mates to take her so she'll go thru the gates easier rather than having 'Mum' stood there.

I will talk to her this morning whilst I walk her to school...but again not easy with DD2 dragging her feet a mile behind us.

I don't think it'll be long before DH will want to go in and speak to someone (teacher/Head) because he's had enough of hearing about all the incidences and feels DD1 is being targetted because she's a bright spark, a nice girl, a slim pretty girl ... and the only common factor in all this is the girls who have been nasty to her/threatened her are NOT. Envy?

scattyspice · 12/05/2008 08:14

Morning Girls!

Sorry DDs been dreading schoolwispy . Good idea to get DH to take her (DS goes in much better with DH than me). Hope she gets through today ok. Try not to worryt about her. She'll find a way to deal with it.

Well we did quite well with the no shouting over the weekend, but we were out and about the whole time which really helps. I did warn DH that I wasn't going to shout at the kids any more so I'd be shouting at him more (LOL)!

Trouble brewing here.Catch up later!

VaginaShmergina · 12/05/2008 16:04

Whispy, how was DD1 day ? How was your day, did you have DD2 with you or have you had a break ?

whispywhisp · 12/05/2008 16:52

Hiya Vag. DD1 ok today. She had a day of SATS including two heavy going maths ones so she's quite tired. Although having said that she's already had her tea and is now busy practising her handstands on the trampoline in the garden! I've had an ok-day today. Had DD2 with me all day - she doesn't do nursery on a Monday. Normally we have a nice quiet day on a Monday but she's been in a grotty mood all day - partly due to her not going to sleep until midnight last night. So my aim for the rest of the day is get the two of them in the bath and early night....wishful thinking?! xxx

VaginaShmergina · 12/05/2008 17:00

Get locks put on the outside of the doors Whispy !!!

Sounds like she had a normal day and no "altercations" today !!

Last thing she needs with her SATS too.

whispywhisp · 12/05/2008 17:18

Yea it was partly our fault tho...DD2 fell asleep during the afternoon yesterday after spending the morning with a friend and I must admit it was nice to have some peace whilst she was asleep but as a result she wouldn't go to sleep last night! I can't have it both ways!

From what I can tell DD1 is 'ok' with this girl, at the moment...but I think its more a case that DD is tolerating her but I do wish she wouldn't use the foul language that she does at school, and I mean FOUL. God only knows what life is like for her at home.

VaginaShmergina · 12/05/2008 17:22

How funny DS did the same he fell asleep on the way to DD dance exam and was asleep thru the whole thing, I just sat in the shade next to the while he slept, it was 10.30 b4 he crashed last night.

You do pay the price later, its a shame they dont have an off switch eh ?

Sounds like a horrid horrid child that DD! is having to put up with, how awful.

whispywhisp · 12/05/2008 18:15

...given half the chance I'd sleep during the afternoon too! How did your DD get on with dance exam yest Vag? xx

VaginaShmergina · 12/05/2008 18:22

Normally they pass, teachers dont put them forwards at this age unless its a given they are ready.

She has a normal lesson tomorrow after school and they normally say then that the girls all passed. She will get a certificate and a rosette.

muttonbird · 13/05/2008 09:55

Morning all.

Hope your mornings have started out ok. I had a bit of a crappy day yesterday, sometimes just the silliest little things (trivial argument with dh, rubbishy day at work etc) knock me so flat I find it hard to drag myself back up. Just need to get a bit of perspective I think, but sometimes it's easier said than done.

Anyway, will try and get into a more positive frame of mind..... Hope everyone else is ok

muttonbird · 15/05/2008 12:15

Have all the rut-dwellers now managed to escape (except for me )? Or have they climbed out of this one and fallen into another one?

Janni · 15/05/2008 19:32

Hi
Feel a bit guilty because I started this thread and have neglected it a bit. I've actually decided I needed to cut down on my MN use, as it was interfering with my time with DD and it was keeping me from tackling things in the house. So now I'm only coming on in the evenings.

I am, generally, feeling brighter and hope others are making progress.

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