Would anyone like to join me on a self-help thread to get out of a rut and feel happier?

[Janni]

I am not happy. I know there are lots of things I could/should do to feel happier eg eat better, do more exercise, make an effort with friends, get out of the house more...but I'm in a rut and feel a bit defeated.

I had the idea of using this thread to post each day a few things we could each do to make ourselves feel better then report back,
encourage each other etc.

Any takers?

[whispywhisp]

U tried putting them in when she's fast asleep? ... ie a deep sleep? Just pull the bottom lid out and shove some in. xxx

[Janni]

well I would, but it says on the bottle they're only to be put in when the patient is awake - it's chloramphenicol, so I don't know if I should!

[scattyspice]

Can you phone NHS direct and ask them. Its impossible to put eye drops in an unc operative child!

Pinky, thats a shame. I hope you can find an alternative.

I've been shattered today as DD didn't sleep well. Lost my temper again with DCs after school, they were constantly asking for things and complaining about every thing. I feel bad because they are both still young (4 and 3) and both at the age of constant chatter, neither can wait for things. When they both go on it gets on top of me (but individually they are no problem so its not their fault). Must try harder.

[Janni]

Scatty - there's a good 'offloading' thread called 'Do your children drive you insane' (sorry I can't do links). It might make you feel better - I just posted on it.

[scattyspice]

Morning Janni (and all). I need that thread, thank you.

Today is Friday so I'm going to slow down and enjoy the sun .

[muttonbird]

Morning ladies. Sorry to hear about glum days yesterday - Janni I hope your dd's eyes are on the mend and you are able to go out for lunch with your dh sometime soon.

PinkyP - hope you are able to sort out alternative arrangements without too much hassle, and as you've said, it may well work out better in the long run.

Scatty I hope your dd had a better night last night - if I don't get enough sleep I am just awful!

As for me, yesterday was OK; got loads to do today so really need to crack on and do it. This thread has helped me to focus on one thing at a time and not feel overwhelmed by everything at once. Main aim for the day: to be more patient with ds after school and not get cross over things that don't actually matter.

All the best

[Janni]

Hi Muttonbird, glad things are going OK and good luck for after school! At least with the nice weather it's easier to be in the park with them!

[readytoswiggin]

morning all

Not read through but I hope everyone's days are going ok. Have been stuck in the familiar black hole, so have not done much the last couple of days.

muttonbird, good luck with being patient, it's trying to ignore the not so good bits.

janni, I know from experiance that eye drops in a sleepng child are better than none at all good luck!

Ok, my aims for today:
-put nappies on line when machine finishes
-adjust dd1's highchair
-e-mail friend to say thank you for dd2's pressie
-try to give ds lots of ds & mummy time
-be more patient with dd1 when she whinges and grizzles

I have the hv coming next tues to do dd1's 2yr check, house is a blardy tip, and I have that untidy house = bad mother mentality so must blitz downstairs

ok, must now go and deal with the earth shaking explosion in dd2's nappy....

later!

[whispywhisp]

Hi all. I've got the dreaded task of talking to DD1's teacher today. She got threatened yesterday by another girl in her class. ie...'you say anything and I'll punch you in the face'..DD1 turned round and sure enough there was a fist coming towards her.

[readytoswiggin]

Oh no! so for you and your dd. Is she ok? Hope the teacher is able to help you both.

[whispywhisp]

Yea she's ok, thanks. She's been the subject of threatening kids three times in as many weeks. I don't want to be seen going in each time something goes wrong to talk to the teacher but unless he is aware of whats going on how can it be stopped? Basically this other girl told my DD to 'piss off' so DD started to walk away and the girl grabbed her by her t-shirt, twisted her arm back and said 'if you tell I'm gonna punch you in the face' to which DD turned around and saw her fist coming towards her so she ran off and told a teacher who told the other girl to apologise, which she did.....I spoke to the other girl's Mother last night who wouldn't have it her daughter would behave in such a way which is why I want to talk to their teacher in the hope he'll talk to the class about bullying.

[readytoswiggin]

that is horrific!

def talk to the teacher, that kind of behaviour is just not acceptabe, in school or out.

[whispywhisp]

Thanks...I'm just gearing myself up to talk to him - I guess he'll ring during the lunchbreak. I have to try really hard not to get upset when it comes to DD1 - I get very protective when she does get picked on and it doesn't help her or me. She has been so ill over the last 6mths - rushed to hospital at one point plus she is hard of hearing (grommets) so I do worry about her. I wish she would be horrible back but she won't. I wish she'd harden up but she won't. Hey ho. Wish me luck! x

[readytoswiggin]

I don't blame you for worrying. I am always anxious that ds might encounter bullying as he's covered in severe eczema.

(((((((((((hugs for you both))))))))))))))

[readytoswiggin]

on a slightly lighter note, dd1's new nappy wraps arrived today, what do you reckon? {pic on profile}

[whispywhisp]

Eczema - that's awful for both of you isn't it. How old is your DS?

I think DD1 is simply 'too nice' which is why she gets picked on. She's also bright and in the top groups etc plus she's a slim pretty girl (sorry...I know I sound big-headed but I'm trying to find a reason why she's always a target) and likes to be friends with everyone. Perhaps these other kids don't like her for what she is...but she's not going to change.

I'm going to ask her teacher what his opinion is on bullying and hear what he has to say and then tell him what happened yeterday and ask that he address the subject to the whole of his class.

I used to help out with reading in her class...especially those in the lower groups - this girl is one of those I listen to....no more I won't...why should I help a child who threatens my own daughter? I'm so angry and upset.

[readytoswiggin]

Ds has just turned 4. He started nursery last sept and although I try to supress the pfb feelings, I do worry, co at that age they just come out with stuff like what's that.

Def quite likely that your dd is too nice, or cos she's bright. or poss cos she's been ill... If you asked the culprits they prob wouldn't know why, just because....

Makes me see cos I was picked on at school cos I was an easy target who like your dd was bright, but didn't fight back. Next week/month another poor child will be the target instead. cowards.

[whispywhisp]

I have spoken to her teacher. He is aware of what happened yesterday and is going to talk to the class next week about it - I've agreed to leave it until then so not to make it look so obvious he is talking to them because of yesterday, iyswim.

I say he was made aware...he said he was made aware of the swearing but didn't know about the threat that followed. He refuses to call it 'bullying'...so we agreed on the term 'threatening behaviour'.

I was picked on as a child too - I won't allow DD to be picked on either. There is absolutely no need for it. The interesting thing to note is that the three girls that have picked on her in the last few weeks are all in the lower groups. I wonder if it is envy?

[scattyspice]

Oh Wispy, poor DD. It is so common at that age isn't it. I'll bet it is envy. Has this girl bothered any of the others? I think its easier to cope with if she doesn't feel its just her.

[readytoswiggin]

I think it is for the best if the class chat is delayed, you don't want her having extra grief because he knows iyswim. threatening behaviour def sums it up...

[whispywhisp]

The teacher said he would address the subject on Tuesday which I agreed with and added that if he did it today it would be too obvious. I only hope he does because he does tend to forget but I will remind him if he fails to. Yes this girl has bothered other kids before and has even been involved in an actual physical fight with a boy. She's a bit of an odd girl. Doesn't have a lot to say but what does come out of her mouth isn't very nice. She calls her mum a tart and I've heard her swear at her Mum too. The teacher was very careful with his words to me on the phone today...often using the word 'allegedly'.....

[readytoswiggin]

sounds like her home life doesn't amount to much...

[readytoswiggin]

unless there are witnesses, I guess he has to be careful in how he describes it, ie using allegedly.

[whispywhisp]

It doesn't. Thats part of the problem I think. I have her for reading 1 to 1 and I asked her only this week if she reads at home. She replied 'no'...because her Mum doesn't want to listen and her Dad shouts at her. She can't read at all. She is 9yrs old. What a worry. My DD has been around her place before now and it is filthy dirty, they live off junk and the language is intolerable. So why does she threaten my daughter then? I told her teacher it seems to us that DD is targetted. He disagreed but she is....she is a quiet happy girl - she's smart, clever and funny - why can't other kids just accept she is the way she is? She's MY daughter too and her teacher knows I'm not one to sit and be quiet (unlike DD!) so he knows I will be on to him again if this keeps cropping up and if I get nowhere with him I will go to the Head.

[whispywhisp]

There were no adult witnesses....they have about 2 Dinner Ladies to 350 kids. There were other witnesses in the form of about 6 girls...3 of which told me the exact same story last night. What more evidence does he need? You can put money on it should it ever happen that DD swore or threatened a child he wouldn't request witnesses etc...it'd just be our luck that she'd get suspended for a day.