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I don’t want to be here anymore

109 replies

SoLostInMyLife · 23/09/2023 15:53

I feel so lost. I hate my life. I don’t know what to do anymore. Nothing is helping

OP posts:
Dawn1331 · 23/09/2023 16:06

Please talk to someone you are valued and needed. Pm anyone you will get support x

Iguessyourestuckwithme · 23/09/2023 16:08

I was where you were 5 weeks ago. In fact I'm probably not too far away from it.

But I got help and I'm so glad did. Have you called 101 2 they were amazing for me

hellohelp · 23/09/2023 16:09

I didn't want to read and run - I'm here

Suckingalemon · 23/09/2023 16:11

Don't give up, reach out, call for help. Things can get better x

Summer2424 · 23/09/2023 16:17

Hi @SoLostInMyLife
Here to listen hun xx

Tilllly · 23/09/2023 16:23

Hey
I'm sorry you feel this way
We're all here to listen to you
I want to help

Willowtree6 · 23/09/2023 16:28

I know it's hard to believe when you are in the midst of it, but you won't feel this low forever. Have you spoke to anyone in the real world about how you are feeling? Family? GP?

We are here to listen, you're not on your own.

SoLostInMyLife · 23/09/2023 16:32

I have tried everything, talking, medication. Nothing worked. There is nothing else for me. I am a burden. My head is tormented and I just want it to stop

OP posts:
SoLostInMyLife · 23/09/2023 16:42

@Iguessyourestuckwithme who is 101?

OP posts:
MagratsDanglyCharms21 · 23/09/2023 16:44

Text 'Shout' to 85258. It is a mental health crisis line. Sometimes we are so locked inside our thoughts that the words can't be said out loud. This is a text based (initially) service. Also, if you are really feeling like self harm is imminent then you should phone 999 for support. It is a free service and does not appear on your phone bill. Xx

MagratsDanglyCharms21 · 23/09/2023 16:45

^^ assuming you're in the UK OP

Whichsideoftherock · 23/09/2023 16:48

Sorry things are looking so bleak op.

A quick question:

  • how is your diet?
  • your quality of sleep?
  • your level of exercise?

Surprising though it may seem, your mood can be significantly impacted by one of these things being out of whack.

DietStartsM0NDAY · 23/09/2023 17:13

You aren't a burden, please feel free to offload and let us listen and support you at this time. There are always people who value you and care. Flowers

TreeHuggerMum1 · 23/09/2023 17:50

You are absolutely not a burden. You’re going to get through this. Reach out. Even if you have done it before. Reach out again, help is there. I promise.

Willowtree6 · 23/09/2023 17:50

I have tried everything, talking, medication. Nothing worked. There is nothing else for me. I am a burden. My head is tormented and I just want it to stop

You are viewing everything through the lense of depression - feeling like you're a burden, that nothing can possibly help, that you will feel this way forever. Your thoughts and reality are not necessarily the same thing, and depression distorts the way you feel and think about everything.

Has there ever been a time where you came out the other side of feeling really low? If so, use that as a reminder that this will pass, even if that feels impossible right now.

Are you on your own today or with other people? Can you try and be kind to yourself and look after yourself the way you would if a dear friend of yours was suffering in the same way? Try and distract yourself if even for a moment with a hot bubble bath, or maybe getting outside and going for a walk even if it's just round a couple of streets.

Are you suffering with anxiety too? Or is it mainly just low.mood?

SoLostInMyLife · 23/09/2023 19:02

There is no one else to reach out to. I’ve exceeded all services within the Gp. Nothing else they can do for me, that’s in their own words. They referred me again for therapy. Could take 18months. They don’t care. No one does. I can’t stand my head buzzing. I just want it to stop and be over

OP posts:
Dawn1331 · 23/09/2023 19:06

This is a very temporary feeling. You just need to get the right help and people to support you. There's only one of you and you're needed x

JoantheVampireSlayer · 23/09/2023 19:06

I'm so sorry, I know how you feel, I'm in the same position 😔

Dawn1331 · 23/09/2023 19:10

You're not alone - there's a lot of us in or have been where you are you both have us to talk to x

Willowtree6 · 23/09/2023 20:29

Obviously different things help different people at different times, but some of the things (or perhaps a mixture of all of them plus time) that helped me are as follows -

f you're feeling very anxious and panicky try some of the calm breathing apps, the ones where it tells you to inhale and exhale for specific amounts of time.

Medication. Just because you've tried antidepressants and they have t worker, don't write them off - there are so many different ones and sometimes it's trial and error.

Talking therapies, although I know you said there are long waiting times. If this for the primary care depression and anxiety type NHS or more specific services? What are do you live in?

Even without talking therapies there are some really good self help books out there (or no doubt podcasts of you are struggling to concentrate enough to read)

Talking to someone who has been there and experienced it themselves and would listen just listen and be non judgemental. Realising that feeling this way is actually quite common can be quite powerful and remind you that you are not alone.

Taking it hour by hour and lowering the expectations you have of yourself. Celebrate the so called small things, which are absolutely not small when you are in the grips of depression, such as getting out of bed to have a shower.

Moving - for me walking and yoga helped.

ASMR - this is a bit of a personal one, but I find it hugely soothing.

You won't feel like this forever, keep going.

Willowtree6 · 23/09/2023 20:30

Sorry just read that back and a lot of typos x

Willowtree6 · 23/09/2023 20:36

.... also distraction - anything that allows you time away from your own head for a bit, it might be a TV programme you enjoy, seeing a friend, going for a massage - it really doesn't matter what just anything to break the cycle of constant rumination for a short while

SoLostInMyLife · 24/09/2023 10:02

I have tried self help books. I can’t concentrate. I could read a page over and over and it doesn’t sink in. I barely slept last night. My head won’t stop. There is nothing positive in my life. This will never stop. Everyone getting on with their lives except me. I’m stuck with no other way out. I’m irrelevant

OP posts:
Dawn1331 · 24/09/2023 10:22

@SoLostInMyLife you are not irrelevant! You matter. Where do you live? Is there any family support? Please don't give up x

SoLostInMyLife · 24/09/2023 10:29

Not much. Think I have not only exceeded gp help but unfortunately their help too. I live in Belfast.

OP posts: