Due to start citroplam today - positive stories needed x

[Painintheass22]

Hi everyone

Due to start citroplam today and I’m nervous. Been prescribed different AD’s over the years, take for a couple of weeks then stop. Due to googling and scaring myself. But I literally can’t go on the way I’m going on. I need help.

please tell me ur positive citroplam stories please.

big hugs to you all x

They are safe to take together just know it might make you extra drows.

Honestly I know how bad it is to begin with but it might make all the difference. It did for next

*drowsy and me

Yes, it has genuinely changed my life. I used to get really horrible feelings of impending doom for no apparent reason, or I'd be in Waitrose and suddenly feel assailed by the idea that everybody was out to get me. Utterly bonkers stuff, you know at the time it can't possibly be right, but it feels so bloody real! Anyway, I won't say I never get those feelings, but I will say they are less intense, also fewer and further between. And I'll settle for that.

Has changing the time you take them helped? I take mine first thing, as I also have to take levothyroxine for an underactive thyroid, which has to be taken half an hr before I eat or drink anything, so I just take the citalopram at the same time and it seems to work for me. Why not take yours before bed as it seems to make you sleepy?

And - keep going, you absolute star. What you are doing is scary, but you've got this. xx

@FetchezLaVache sleep is non existent tonight 🙈 anxiety not as bad as last couple of nights though. But my anger was so bad tonight. Doesn’t help that I’m scrolling the internet at 1am reading all the negative stories about Citropalm now 🙄

i am hoping this AD saves my relationship(though I think my partner has truely had enough this time) and I’m reading stories how it made their relationship worse as they basically were emotionless on it and it wreaked there relationship/marriage as a result

It’s helped me - no magic solution but it’s kept my moods more stable.

it does take some time to settle and you might feel worse before you feel better. I had a panic attack a couple of days after starting. Also lost a lot of weight as my appetite vanished. But it all settled after around a week, and it was worth sticking it out.

@crummyusername hi. Glad it helped you. What mg were u on? My moods are so up and down. I just want to be normal

My sleep is ok now, I wake at 5 but I often did anyway and I don't really mind as overall I feel less tired - I used to be hysterically desperate for bed at 9 and I'm normal tired now and don't need to go up quite as early (much better with teenage dd as I used to turn into a monster). I was worried about sleep as I am prone to insomnia but read a few forums and people said it settled for them - if it carries on maybe try taking it first thing, but try not to mess around too much with the timings.

Don't let yourself google, it's the path to madness! MN is much better to read for this type of thing.

I felt the same as you OP and got into a desperate state before I finally decided to give escitalopram a go. I’ve been on it several months and it has definitely helped. There is a lot of stress in my life but it has taken the edge off the anxiety, made me calmer and more able to think and implement strategies to manage my DC who both have some struggles. It has also made me be able to engage better in therapy. I’m really glad now I’ve gone on it and wish I had sooner. And if you’re quite sensitive yes the tiredness and spacey feeling can def kick in very quickly and for me took a few weeks to settle down.

At first it made me sleep a lot, now I’ve adjusted to the dose my sleeping is starting to get bad again so I’m considering asking to go up to a higher dose as I’m on 10mg. But overall it’s been positive for me. Hang in there.

20mg. I’m wondering now about increasing it though.

@crummyusername when did u start on it? This is my day 4. Feel like a the last few days have been a blur.

@stillherenow took my first 2 tablets at 2.30pm, yesterday it was 6.30pm. Wondering should I take it at 9am this morning to see or is that too big of a jump?

Been on it for years. First two weeks I felt odd and then it settled. No side effects. I am.happy. 20mg.then 30mg. It is not a fix but helps with keeping mood stable. I exercise and had therapy too.

In absolute bits today 😔

Desperately need these tablets to kick in. I’ve pushed my loving partner definitely away beyond return. My 5 year old took me he hated me this morning. It’s all a mess.

*told

I can’t stop crying. I don’t know what to do

It's OK, we've got you, OP.

Kids do that all the time, they just want to hear "I love you". I recommend the stock replies "That doesn't matter, because I love you enough for both of us" or "That's a shame, because I love you very much" every time. Please don't take it personally.

You talk a lot about pushing your partner away - would you like to tell us more about the kind of things you do?

@FetchezLaVache feel like I’m having a complete breakdown.

I love my children so much and these tablets are for them. I don’t want to be like this anymore. Them constantly walking on egg shells.

oh where do I start about my partner. I love him so unbelievably much but I’m a bitch and I don’t mean to be. I honestly don’t.

Keep going, OP. The first two weeks were awful for me. I didn’t notice a difference until the second month, when I realised I hadn’t been feeling the sense of dread and hopelessness that used to randomly creep up on me. It’s such a relief. Sometimes I can still feel that feeling start to materialise but it’s like it’s separate from me or there’s a delay of sort before it properly hits and in that delay I have the time to recognise it as a temporary emotion rather than an all consuming state of being, and once I’ve done that it usually just ebbs away and I can get on with my day.

@LazyJayne how did u feel after the 2nd week? I don’t think I could last into the 2nd month. I don’t. I feel empty and that I can’t go on any longer. I feel I am beyond help.

and I’m reading stories how it made their relationship worse as they basically were emotionless on it and it wreaked there relationship/marriage as a result

Stop reading stories!

For what it's worth, that hasn't been my experience. I love my DP, DS and DCat so much, they're probably all sick of hearing about it/being kissed all the time!

You clearly love your family very, very much and I can't see how you'd suddenly become either indifferent to them or unable to communicate your feelings for them.

@Painintheass22 for me it was:

first two weeks - increased anxiety, feeling upset, bouts of nausea. thought about stopping.

second two weeks - back to normal, not better, not worse.

fifth week - started to notice decline in anxiety and less feelings of hopelessness.

sixth week - noticeable change. calmer, less emotional.

@FetchezLaVache i’m always reading stories. Even there now. All the bloody time! Dementing myself even more(if that’s possible) I’ve so so so much more going on too beyond what I’ve already said in my life. Always paranoid to give me detail on this incase someone knows its me lol. But my life is messy. Very messy at the minute. But I HAD the best DP who loved me dearly. My DC, I feel for them all.

Do u think the way I’m feeling is the tablets working in a roundabout way?

I am a mess.

Thank you @LazyJayne for that insight. I need to ride out this storm don’t i? I’ve no choice only to try it!

It sounds as if certain things you’re doing today might be making the anxiety worse? I’d put down your phone so you can’t look up any more stories and try to come up with a few things to focus on, to distract your mind from the anxiety.

If you’re at home, is there some paperwork that needs sorting out, laundry to be done, a cupboard to tidy? Anything that forces your mind to stop focusing on what you’re struggling with, even if it’s only for a short time. I’d also advise keeping off SM…perhaps just a quick update on Mumsnet later if you feel like it. 😀