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Original poster

What mental health condition is this?

32 replies

Bumblebray · 09/03/2022 15:45

Any help on this would be highly appreciated…

I started dating a guy 4 months ago. Everything is perfect, except for a few things…

At night, and sometimes during the night, he talks to himself, claiming to be talking to ‘the angels, spirits, the police, the government, aliens’ I asked him if he had scitzaphrenia, because he clearly hears things that are not there. He believes in aliens, and that he has an alien family. He said that one day he looked down and he was an alien for a few seconds. It sounds so crazy, and it is such a shame, because he is such a lovely person who I care for so much, but I don't know how to help him. Sometimes he is very moody, and when I ask him what is wrong, he tells me he has tried to help people (meaning the spirits) and he hasn’t been able to do so. Sometimes he goes weeks without doing this, and then sometimes he can’t go hours without. What can I do for him, to help him get better?

We are in a long distance relationship and he speaks a different language, so when he is talking to himself I don’t know what he is saying.

He sometimes smokes cannabis, but not enough to be like this. He smokes CBD sometimes, and I notice he talks more when he is having a cigarette. I know he was abused as a child and I’m wondering if this is something to do with it too

OP posts:
drspouse · 09/03/2022 15:48

We can't diagnose your friend...

Original poster
Bumblebray · 09/03/2022 15:49

I don’t want you to diagnose. I wanted to know if anyone had heard of anything similar and what they did to help that person.

OP posts:
BlanketsBanned · 09/03/2022 15:50

Could be anything, drug induced psychosis, schizophrenia. He needs to see a doctor and get the mental health help he needs. He is clearly very unwell.

lemongreentea · 09/03/2022 15:54

run, dont walk

LizDoingTheCanCan · 09/03/2022 16:00

How would he respond if you suggested he ditch the cannabis?

IstayedForTheFeminism · 09/03/2022 16:03

Could be anything tbh. From drug induced paranoia to Bipolar disorder or schizophrenia.

It sounds far too much work for a 4 month LDR tbh. I'd be recommending he contacts his GP and then ending things with him.

UnbeatenMum · 09/03/2022 16:07

The symptoms are psychosis. It could be one of several MH conditions or could be drug induced (some people react very badly to cannabis). You should help him by encouraging him to seek professional help, this isn't something you can 'fix' yourself.

SilverMakeUpBag · 09/03/2022 17:16

Please encourage him to seek help OP. That’s the only piece of advice I can give you.

Wolfiefan · 09/03/2022 17:17

He’s not in a position to be in a relationship.

StringFellow · 09/03/2022 17:26

All of the above, and he’s not in a place to be starting on a new relationship clearly so you absolutely shouldn’t be looking at all the ways you can support him, that’s not your job. Does he acknowledge he has a problem, even? Has he been to the GP?

Supersimkin2 · 09/03/2022 17:29

Psychosis, which is a feature of drug use and/or schizophrenia among other problems.

SommerTen · 09/03/2022 20:17

He has psychosis and needs medication probably!!

LuluBlakey1 · 09/03/2022 20:19

Where is he?

Needs medical help but you need to head off in the opposite direction and never look back.

De88 · 09/03/2022 20:20

It is not your job to help him - leave that to the professionals.

Vallmo47 · 09/03/2022 20:25

As someone who suffered with psychosis and was on medication for 3 years, this sounds similar. I’ve never taken drugs in my life but I know they play a prominent role in many psychotic episodes.
I used to talk to God and heard voices as clear as day. There was no talking to me at the time, it was entirely rational to me and no one could have told me otherwise. If he’s unwilling to seek help, could you reach out to a family member of his with your concerns? God and spirits often play a part in psychosis. He will believe in it 100% and needs medication to eventually realise he was ill. I kept repeating “Psychosis, is what they say I have”. I still didn’t understand it. A few months later it hit me like a sledgehammer and I truly understood and was utterly, utterly appalled with myself and my behaviour at the time.
If this is what your boyfriend suffers from, he needs help from someone who isn’t long distance.
You’re so lovely for caring.

Help can be had. My husband tricked me into going to GP claiming they’d spoken to God too. It sounds insane to me now but at the time I fell for it. GL!

Notsandwiches · 09/03/2022 20:27

I think it's probably schizophrenia and cannabis use can be the catalyst. (My brother suffered from this and it gets worse if not treated). It is very difficult to get someone to seek treatment because to them it is all real. Has he ever sought help?

TabithaTittlemouse · 09/03/2022 20:28

Are you worried about his ability to look after himself? Do you think he’s a risk to himself or others?

Littleguggi · 09/03/2022 21:06

He sounds really unwell and needs help urgently. What are these spirits commanding him to do? What is his daily functioning like? Like others have said it could be a number of things, drug induced psychosis, dissociation, trauma, a neurodevelopmental disorder..

OakRowan · 09/03/2022 21:13

You need to help yourself here, not him, 4 months in you are in an unsafe relationship, with lots of things happening that aren't appropriate,or healthy for you or for him, this isn't safe for you, do you understand that? It isn't for you to solve, to support him, or to live with day to day, so soon into meeting someone. Yes it could be drug induced psychosis, or have other causes/reasons, but he isn't in treatment, doesn't have any support and isn't taking care of himself, so that isn't ok for you to be around. Its not about what help he needs from you, thats focusing on the wrong thing, its about keeping yourself out of harm's way.

Original poster
Bumblebray · 09/03/2022 21:37

Thank you so much this was really helpful. I do have a contact number for his niece so maybe I can contact her and chat with her for help. Thank you!

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 09/03/2022 21:39

If he’s psychotic he needs actual medical help. Poss to be sectioned.

Original poster
Bumblebray · 09/03/2022 21:42

He has told me that he doesn’t need help. It’s so difficult because he has fallen out with a lot of friends now because they have told him he is sick and that he needs to see a doctor. I don’t know what I can do to convince him he needs help…

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 09/03/2022 21:45

You can’t. If he won’t engage and kick the weed habit he will need to be sectioned. A welfare check?

Littleguggi · 09/03/2022 21:55

He's falling out with friends and clearly lacking insight into his mental health which suggests that it may be more serious.

Random789 · 09/03/2022 22:00

He definitely needs to see a doctor, and there isn't anything you can do to make him better. You mustn't make it your responsibility. It is too difficult. And you are so early in your relationship.

But if you still want to be in the relationship, and he does too, then just ordinary calmness, consistency, gentleness and affection will help to some extent, just as they would with any illness. It probably won't be helpful to try and challenge his delusions.

Psychosis doesn't make someone unsafe to be with by the way, as has been suggested upthread. It's just that coping with the demands of your friend's illness may be more than is reasonable to expect of yourself.