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Original poster

Tax credit

134 replies

Help45 · 12/03/2021 09:28

I’m looking for help I posted on a old thread that was similar to my issue last night as I’m new to all of this.....I’ve got myself in bother and I’m going out of my head with worry..I’m being investigated for tax credit fraud and yes I have done wrong I know that but I’m feeling like my only way out is too end it all and spare my family and partner who all knew nothing the embarrassment that I’ve caused....my stomach is in knots I can’t afford a solicitor and I’m petrified I will go to prison or end up in court where everyone will find out about me I can’t bare that for my kids or family..I honestly feel ending it is the only option...help please

OP posts:
Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 11:11

I’ve got answers for them but I don’t know what they will ask....I wish my mum was here to talk too 😞😞

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youvegottenminuteslynn · 15/03/2021 11:15

@Help45

I’ve got answers for them but I don’t know what they will ask....I wish my mum was here to talk too 😞😞
Have you thought of an manageable amount you could commit to paying back monthly? This will be hugely helpful as it shows you are proactive and cooperative and also allows you to steer the conversation somewhat.
Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 11:23

I can pay back between 100-150 a month I’m on furlough the now and when I can get back to work if I get more hrs I would put it towards this debt.

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youvegottenminuteslynn · 15/03/2021 11:26

@Help45

I can pay back between 100-150 a month I’m on furlough the now and when I can get back to work if I get more hrs I would put it towards this debt.
Offer to pay back either £100 or slightly less per month if it's truly manageable. It's a starting point for negotiation and shows you are willing and able to prioritise what you owe them. Many people will be paying back £10 a month or similar so you are showing that you're willing and able to start making a dent in it as much as you can.
Skyliner001 · 15/03/2021 11:28

Good luck, please let us know what happens, we are all here for you

MondeoFan · 15/03/2021 11:41

Don't offer to pay back a huge amount of you can't afford it. Think they will just be happy you've offered to pay it back. They will ask you what you can afford comfortably I think.

Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 11:49

Thanks everyone I truly mean that I know a lot of people will be thinking well you caused this and I know I did but I’m honestly so so sorry and I will never ever do anything so bloody stupid again....I just hope I get through this I really do ❤️

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youvegottenminuteslynn · 15/03/2021 11:53

If you think you can afford £100 then maybe offer £50/75 so you aren't putting yourself in a cycle you get stuck in again. Perhaps ask to start repayments when you are no longer on furlough. Be sorry but clear, proactive and engaged. They will prefer that to someone crying (as harsh as that sounds as I know it's very tough) because their objective is for you to commit to starting repayments.

Please do come back on and update us if you would like, there's plenty of support here for you!

Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 12:15

I will thank you everyone...I just want to pay it back if my partner stays I won’t be entitled to any help at all and I’m not sure he has fully decided what he is doing he is so angry with me,I don’t know if HMRC expect it to be paid back within a certain time I hope they understand I really hope it’s someone who will listen to me cause I couldn’t deal with someone who is going to make me feel worse than I do cause I feel absolutely terrible I’m at my wits end here I really am,and if my partner does go I do t know if I would be able to claim as I don’t think they would let me now which I understand.

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Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 13:24

I’ve had my phone call the women was so lovely she really was I told her it all and she said my claim would stop straight away which I knew and I will get a letter to tell me that and I will also get a letter in 10-14 days about paying the money back.

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littlepattilou · 15/03/2021 13:27

@Help45 Glad you're OK today, and are on the road to getting it sorted.

Flowers
Movinghouse2015 · 15/03/2021 13:29

Don't panic when you get the letter. They may request it all back at once. Call them and agree a payment plan that you can afford.

LIZS · 15/03/2021 13:31

Glad it went ok. Make an appointment with CAB when you get the letter. They can help you work out a payment plan and with budgetting.

StellaDendrite · 15/03/2021 13:33

That’s a really positive update OP. I’m so relieved for you that you have got it out the way. I think the fact that you’ve been honest and haven’t made excuses to them or to yourself will help you get over it more easily.

What are you going to do this afternoon? You must be feeling exhausted.

Is it possible to talk this through with someone in real life?

Might your partner be up for some couples counselling? He’s obviously every right to feel angry and disappointed but it might help you both deal with it even if it ends up that he wants to end the relationship.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 15/03/2021 13:34

Well done OP. Now breathe!

When the letter comes, don't panic.

Remember how anxious you were before today's call and we said it would be ok and it was.

That's the case for the letter too. Everything is fixable and you're taking responsibility and want to pay it back.

Now eat something!!!

NurseP · 15/03/2021 13:38

Help45, good news that they were nice on the phone.
I hope your partner will be supportive. I know he must feel let down but you are not the first person to make a mistake, panic and bury their heads while it escalates.
All you can do is apologise, own the mistake, learn from it and move on. Your partner should not punish you for this, toh have done that enough to yourself.
When the letter / bill comes,call and arrange a payment plan that you cam manage.
You should be so proud that you got through this and are working towards rectifying g your mistake.
Please breathe, eat and forgive yourself. Flowers

Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 13:38

Thank you to everyone I mean it you have all kept my from doing anything silly this weekend she said as soon as I get the letter to co tact them about a repayment schedule either weekly or monthly but to definitely call them not too ignore it and I won’t I want this over with I want to live my life and not worry about things I just need to hope my partner forgives me as he had the embarrassment of explaining to his boss why he was taking a half day at work today but ultimately I understand if he can’t as I have broke his trust and that’s hard to regain it really is.xx

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Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 13:44

@NurseP, Thank you for your kind words I mean that I’ve tortured myself since Thursday and I still find it hard to forgive myself I need to get help with talking about things cause I’m so bad at it.I hope he can forgive me but I understand if it’s to much for him he is so honest but I will work on gaining his trust even if it means he has to move out for us to restart things I can work with that.xx

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Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 13:55

@littlepattilou @StellaDendrite @Movinghouse2015 @youvegottenminuteslynn,thank you all... going to take a walk up and visit my mums grave and have a chat with her I feel she was watching over me today then I need to try to eat and sleep I’m exhausted I really am.
I will suggest couples counselling to him as I will do what it takes to repair what I have done.We both come from very honest families and I never ever going to break anyone’s trust I’ve learnt my lesson I really have I will also speak to CAB about help with debt management.xxx

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PotNoodles234 · 15/03/2021 14:09

So pleased to hear your update @Help45

Remember, everything can be sorted out but totally understand how you were feeling Thanks

Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 14:19

@PotNoodles234..Thank you I mean that I want to sort it all out and I will never ever make silly mistakes again cause it was a stupid mistake,I hate myself for what I’ve done to my family and for what I’ve done to myself why would I be so bloody stupid.xx

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Gazelda · 15/03/2021 14:29

You've faced up to your mistake and are now dealing with it.
I think it's time to stop beating yourself up over this. Focus on sorting it, with professional help if possible.
Of course you are sorry for what's happened, and I'm sure your DP understands that too.
Show him how determined you are to put things right - I admire anyone who tries to rectify a mistake instead of not taking action.
You've done bloody well today. I imagine you're exhausted. Be kind to yourself.
Have a think about who you can speak with for help - CAB, debt management company, mental health counsellor etc. The. Look up their contact details.
Make that call your next priority, tomorrow if possible.

Tinygem · 15/03/2021 14:33

Only just seen this thread, so glad it went well for you. I know it's easily said but it's only money and everyone makes mistakes.You will get to the other side of this, there are far more important things in life. Your family would be devastated if you weren't around anymore, so glad you've updated. Take care.Flowers

Original poster
Help45 · 15/03/2021 14:51

@Gazelda @Tinygem..thank you both I’m definitely going to be dealing with the things I need to deal with...I need to stop hating myself I have for a very long time I have no self esteem at all and again something I need to sort.you are all very kind.xx

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MondeoFan · 15/03/2021 14:57

This is the first step to things getting better hopefully. You must feel so relieved it's over.
You've done the right thing it's horrible to live life keep looking over your shoulder. I think your partner will come round in time. I think he'll be ok. Probably still shocked by what you told him.
Look at it as a fresh start....