Would any one like to join in an anxiety support thread?

[Heatherandmoss]

I’ve seen lots of posts recently about people having a bad time with their anxiety and I thought an on going thread might be good do people can bob on and offer and receive support, share tips and just generally empathise with some one going through the same thing.

I’ve had anxiety since I was about ten ( I realised after my psychiatrist was able to help me pin point my earliest memory of it)

I think there is a bit of misconception of anxiety as some people think it’s just general worry - but it’s not.

When my anxiety rears her head it’s so physical. I sweat, my face can go numb, pains in my chest. I have a feeling like some one is kicking my front door in and I’m scared for my life and I could just be hoovering. Anxiety jolts me awake when I’m asleep and it rolls down my body like thunder. It makes me catastrophize at 3am and my feet start rubbing against each other ( weird) My anxiety makes me walk in to the kitchen with my kids empty dinner plates and suddenly feel so so over whelmed I struggle for breath and tears leak out in a gasp of raw emotion - all done silently so my kids can’t hear me.

I’ve had to give up drinking alcohol because Jesus the anxiety the next day was shocking and lasted days until I suddenly stepped out the anxiety room.

My anxiety has been bad since November as I’ve got some things going and I’m worried my heart is going to pack in because of the extra ‘thud thud thud’ overtime it’s being doing!

Exercise does help me take the edge of sometimes. I nearly went to the GP the other day as it was rotten but at this moment of time I need to be switched on.

Today has not been to bad. I’m considering it a win.

So I’ve you’d like to join in or have some where to say ‘holy fuck it’s bad today’ hopefully more people will be here and you will know some one knows how bad your feeling.

SingToTheSky- well done for getting some cleaning and tidying done. For me the hardest part is getting started. I know what you mean about self care.

What are you studying?

I've woken up with a headache. Just trying to drink plenty of water. Hoping that will help.

I’ve been reading through the posts but haven’t read anyone having similar anxiety to me? I’m ok in the day when working etc but anytime I try to sleep I keep thinking that the minor health niggles I have are going to turn into something sinister, I’ll die in my sleep, also my grandad died in mid forties ( everyone below him has made it to old age) but that I’ll have his genes and die.
It’s like I’m ok about my life ( usual covid worries like everyone , will my teen be ok home schooling, I’m out working will I be ok, dh be ok etc etc) but then it catches me in small hours.
Is there anyone getting that ?

I think it can be easier for the worries to set in at night. Fewer distractions to keep our minds away from the negative :(

Loki I’m studying a cache level 2 course called “understanding children and young people’s mental health”. I already did another one called “counselling skills” last year as the local adult education people have been offering them free. It gave me a taste for studying again so I’m hoping to start OU in September - still can’t decide between Psychology and Psychology with Counselling. Next time I see my therapist (she’s a psychologist) I’ll ask her opinions!

But right now of course I have been catastrophising due to feeling so panicky on these meds - everything feels so hopeless when I’m like this, like I could never manage anything.

I haven’t done the form for the volunteer role yet either, and DD1 has loads of work to catch up on which is really hanging over us (she has some learning difficulties which mean she can’t just be left to get on with it).

Right. Must have breakfast and then I’ll get on with a bit of my course before I overthink it!

Sing - that sounds really interesting. Hope you have a productive day. I'm trying to talk myself into starting the housework! Then make soup for lunch, hopefully 🤞

@Lokikitty, I've got a 2.5 year old DD and a 5 month old DS. I'm as well supported as one can be during lockdown, I think. We're also in the process of buying a new house, so that's not helpful. I am barely scraping by keeping on top of the housework and the kids and just feeling endlessly guilty for not doing enough with them, so time for creativity isn't very available (not that I've any creative talent at all anyway!) Sorry you're off sick with it, it's a rubbish illness.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow That sounds awful. With me it's more whenever I feel I should be content, I start feeling really anxious- nauseated, butterflies etc- and I can feel my brain searching for a reason behind it. Then, when it finds a reason, I fixate on it and feel even worse. I suffer with intrusive thoughts. This morning it was an off the cuff comment I made to DH (we had a rough night with the kids. I said that the youngest looked so pleased to be alive while the adults just wish we were dead (badly phrased, I should've said we felt like zombies or something) and then sat and worried for ages that I'd issued a challenge of some sort to the universe that'd end in my untimely demise.)

@SingToTheSky The procrastination is awful, isn't it? I hated that about studying. I used to break it down into tiny tasks that aren't scary and just ignore the rest. So if find myself literally saying, 'Just turn on the laptop, that's not scary... Now open the document...' and I'd have a treat of some description for every time I completed one of the tiny steps on particularly bad days. Well done for being productive.

@DobbleDobble, I've had that before. Usually when I'm busy during the day. I feel fine at the time when things happen but then obsess about them overnight when I'm supposed to be asleep. Right now on mat leave, my brain has too much free time so I'm getting it constantly.

Also worrying if I’ll cope when lockdown has gone , my job role has changed enormously since covid and will not return in original format til it’s gone or minimal , it’s not at all enjoyable what I’m doing and who knows how long for ..... these worries too

@DobbleDobble

Also worrying if I’ll cope when lockdown has gone , my job role has changed enormously since covid and will not return in original format til it’s gone or minimal , it’s not at all enjoyable what I’m doing and who knows how long for ..... these worries too

I can appreciate that this is very stressful. Hopefully, with the vaccines, COVID restrictions will ease considerably soon and you'll be able to get back to your normal working conditions.

Wineinthewillows- I'm not surprised that you're struggling. You have got a lot going on. Good luck with the new house. I'm guessing the process has taken a lot longer due to the pandemic.

DobbleDobble - I understand how you feel 💐
I work in a school. The one way system, constant handwashing, constant cleaning, bubbles and having to self isolate for 10 days with very little notice, getting used to taking videos of yourself for remote learning makes an already hard job unbearable.

I managed to do the washing up and take rubbish out. Thought I'd go for a walk while it is bright and mild. But just felt really out of it. Sat on a bench crying, feel so sad and alone 😭

It must be so hard having big job role changes. I was lucky in that I wasn’t working anyway and DS has been home educated for years so in some ways there haven’t been as many changes.

I got some of my assignment done and my tutor has offered me a month extension on the course as a whole which feels plenty. Anxiety is definitely still there today - but it’s like a pressure on my chest rather than a vice on the tightest setting, if that makes sense. I have managed a bit more laundry and to make my lunch (although late as I was sitting there overwhelmed for a good hour first) so I’m really hoping I’m through the worst now.

Lokikitty, I’m a teacher too also off sick with anxiety.

It’s such a bloody brutal job where everything is held up to the microscope. It’s awful. I became a teacher to teach children, not to be inspected every second.

I can’t deal with it anymore, and then Covid. Bloody nightmare.

I’ve read this before but I needed to see this today.

Love that message SingToTheSky. It's very true. Sometimes people can get too caught up in perfection and all or nothing. Your best is always good enough 🙂

Lovely message @SingToTheSky. Don't let perfect be the enemy of good.

I'm a teacher too, weirdly enough, and thanking my lucky stars I started maternity leave last summer.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

Sounds like a bad school. I've worked in one of those and only lasted half a term before handing in my notice. The one I work at is better. Still very very stressful, but less micro-management. I remember the head at the other school standing there with a clipboard and a stopwatch at the start of the day to critique how efficient we were at bringing classes in. We got individual written feedback on it. The level of scrutiny in some places is unreal.

I do think the idea of doing something half arsed rather than not at all is pretty helpful. Unfortunately today I’m just totally stuck. I feel like the physical anxiety symptoms have worn off a bit now but I’m finding it really hard to get up in the mornings. Not that I’ve ever been a morning person but now I just sit scrolling and not able to drag myself up.

Today we had a phone call from the paediatrician about my eldest, and I just feel sad and overwhelmed and guilty and so many things, ended up sobbing afterwards on DH. So I haven’t been back downstairs at all, not eaten anything, asked DH to do my ready meal as I can’t even face doing that.

SingToTheSky - hope you have eaten and you are feeling a bit better 💐
I had a bad morning too. I couldn't stop crying. Everything just feels so hopeless. I'm so bored and isolated at home.
I want to return to work but I know that the issues that were causing my stress will still be there. I've even considered a career change today.
Phoned Samaritans and woman I spoke to was lovely. Still feel low but have stopped crying and have eaten.

This morning I woke up with a wave of crushing anxiety again so decided I would send a message in to the GP for some help. Years ago I used Amitriptyline for a short period of work stress. Anyway, before I’d completed the form I told myself I haven’t been trying hard enough to improve things naturally (e.g sleep hygiene, reducing mindless internet browsing, eating better). So I didn’t send it. Now I’m overwhelmed again, have got a whole new set of ‘worries’ that my brain has decided to add to yesterday’s... argh.

Could anyone give me a rough idea of what will happen if I tell the GP I’m struggling? How do they decide on a medication or route of therapy etc? I don’t want to talk to anyone about it, I just want to feel better Does anything like this affect your work health record and employment opportunities?

Sending thanks to all who are sharing their experiences on here, I’m grateful for this thread.

Thebearandthemare - just wanted to say that your gp will discuss different options to see what you are comfortable with. Do you want meds or counselling or both. Would meditation help. That kind of thing. They will ask you what you feel that you need . I won't tell you not to worry, cos I know that it's only natural to be worried.
Reach out for help. You can do this 💐

I hope we all feel better soon. Sometimes I think that there is way too much focus on healthy eating and exercise. I know in the past I have had times when I've obsessively eaten healthy food only, believing that I would be better. My anxiety is a part of me. There is no diet, exercise or meds that will take it away completely. People that haven't experienced mental health don't get that. They think that are doing things right and we must be doing things wrong. So sorry for rambling 🤣

Can I join? just done my own post. I'm struggling from not sleeping. Will the doc give me sleeping pills for a few days? I'm transitioning off a horrible migraine drug that has knocked me for six and so need some anxiety relief as it's affecting my sleeping, eating and anxiety. I need a crux for a few days to level out as I've been turning to alcohol which makes me so ashamed to say

Hi, Imagineit, that sounds awful. Have you been given something for the anxiety? I take propranolol and it is really good for the physical symptoms of anxiety.
Sorry you're struggling 💐
Hope you've got someone to support you.

How is everyone today? I've got really bad period ppain.I'm sitting at home, wishing the day away, trying not to cry from the pain 😭

Hi imagine I have been given zopiclone before for short term.

loki sorry about the period pain that sucks :(

I have tried to be proactive today at least on the MH stuff. So much other stuff I should have been doing but I find it impossible to focus on anything else while waiting for a phone call!

The doctor is a bit reluctant to prescribe anything new so she’s speaking to her superior and I’m going to leave a message with the psychiatrist as if the doctor can’t then hopefully she can sort something and I need to discuss the other medication anyway before my next prescription.

There’s so much else I should be doing but I just feel too “stuck”