can't motivate myself to do anything - please give me a nudge

[monkeyonthetable]

I wake up every morning and have zero motivation for anything. There are loads of things I'd like to do or could do but I seem to have an invisible block stopping me from actually doing any of them. I found it hard enough this morning to just have a bath and get dressed. Weirdly, the stuff I most want to do is even harder to get motivated about.

I am managing a walk most days, a bit of cooking, shared with DH and the bare minimum housework. But even the house seems so perpetually grubby from having everyone home all the time, and I don't have energy to clean, only to see it undone within 24 hours.

I feel like I need someone to tell me: do this now. I just can't find the ignition myself.

Anyone feel the same? Or have advice? or fancying telling me what to get started on? I know it seems silly but it is really dragging me down and making me feel deeply self-critical. Slippery slope.

Mascotte good news you are feeling ok today

monkeyonthetable Hope you're having an ok day

@wildthingsinthenight - hi, how did today go? We're trying to do three things every day that we wouldn't otherwise get done - can be tiny, like posting a letter, having a shower, or bigger things if you are already on top of the small stuff. Glad you are joining.

Doing the bare minimum round the house at minute. Started off well at beginning of lockdown.

@chunkyrun - me too. I really need to do more hoovering (pet hate job). I've started to find dust balls drifting around on the floor. Bit gross.

Maybe that should be on tomorrow's list.

It was a good day thanks monkey
Didn't do much more than I put in my first post but it felt positive. Oh I made a chilli too

Re housework I am just doing the bare minimum too

I've just had a shower & cleaned my teeth so I feel good

That's great Terralee
I didn't get out of bed til very late. I'm washed and dressed but feel exhausted again. Hoping I can motivate myself to have a tidy up later and we really should go for a walk. Fingers crossed it happens.
Oh I did empty the dishwasher

I'm shattered. DS2 had a crisis last night and I was up until the early hours helping him out. Meanwhile DS1 was doing a sleepout for Shelter and I was fretting about him so woke early. Had about four hours sleep which makes me a zombie. So I went for a walk with DS1, did another mum-psychotherapist session with DS2, went for a walk with DS2, did 2 hours work. Now so tired I can barely stand up. Glass of wine and early night. DH cooking. I think I'd burn the house down if I tried.

Oh no monkey that sounds a stressful day!
Hope your DS is feeling better today and that you had a good nights sleep.

I have 3 things on my list today.
Go for an hours walk
Change the beds
Iron

Done the walk ( so hard to get out of the door)
DH has changed beds while I was out and I am about to iron.

Wishing you all a good day xx

I actually did some ironing last night as I needed my denim shorts!

I've been for an hour walk now I'm about to have a nice shower.

Then I hope to change my bedding.

Please can I join in? I have been feeling so unmotivated and disorganised. My kids just seem to spend the whole day on screens. I just barely have the energy to feed us all.

My three tasks are:

• finish the survey I've been working on and send the web link to our administrator to share
• try to get my kids dressed and teeth brushed
• do some washing up

@ejecoms of course you can join in!

I didn't change my bedding yesterday but I washed my cat's litter tray & renewed all her litter. I think she appreciated the effort.

I've been to the supermarket.

Now I'm waiting for the CPN to bring my lorazepam prescription.

Hi everyone, and welcome @ejecoms.

Good work on getting the ironing done @Terralee - I stared at some clothes that needed ironing then shrugged and put them on anyway. Still creased but some of the creases have come out with the heat of the sun. Also the cat litter - that's a big-effort job when you're feeling demotivated.

Yesterday: managed a walk and read half a short novel, did a laundry load and contacted a friend to set up a zoom chat. Also played Bananagrams with DC which they love and it beats been glued to screens all day - even DC are sick of this now.

I have only contacted one friend for a chat since lockdown began and only two have contacted me . I really do need to put more effort into my social life. I'm looking at all the people in the neighbours' gardens and in the parks all picnicking together now and don't really have anyone to do that with.

Today - finally sorted out DC student finance. Big palaver as they had one DC registered incorrectly. Took hours on the phone and having to do forms by hand as online accounts kept rejecting his registration number. Finally done.
Been for a walk.
Finished the novella (Stephen King - Shawshank Redemption - it's good and short and eventually uplifting if anyone needs a recommendation.)
Made fresh guacamole for lunch - bit more effort than usual.

Well done @Terralee - ironing is a major achievement!

@monkeyonthetable - sounds like you got a lot done. I too have realised that I make very little effort with my social life and want to put some effort in. Once half term is over, I’m thinking of inviting a friend for a distant meet up in a park.

Once I got going yesterday, I managed to do the washing up and even gave the dishwasher a good clean out (it is not working properly and I’ve ordered a new part). I even managed to tidy up a room that hasn’t really been touched since we moved house. But now I am back feeling unmotivated. My goals for today are: do the washing up; run or cycle to work; do my email and to do list and work. I’ll do the washing up now and then watch a video I want to watch.

I've been reading this lovely thread and wondered if I could join?

I've been really struggling with motivation and spend most days feeling like I'm in a 'slump'. I get to the end of each day and wonder what on earth I have done with all the hours. It's so confusing and frustrating.

Today I would like to:
Hoover downstairs.
Plant some veg plants that are about to 'go over'
Clean and tidy my bedroom

I've managed to get up earlier than DH and DS and it feels nice to be sitting on my own with a cup of tea.

Wishing everyone a good day.

Welcome @peoplepleaser1. It is so difficult at the moment. I feel like I’m so slow and unmotivated. Hopefully we can keep each other accountable and get a bit more done x

@ejecoms thank you.

Sounds like you had a really good day yesterday. That's something to feel good about.

I've got to have a shower this morning so that's my main task to achieve!

Hi @peoplepleaser1 - welcome.

@ejecoms I realised my demotivation was because most of the things on my to do list were duties so I added some fun stuff too which motivated me a bit more. I love reading but can't focus on novels for long so have ordered some novellas and am looking forward to them.

Hi I had a shower before lunchtime then my mum visited.
I did one load of washing & watered the garden.
I really need to change the bedding.

@monkeyonthetable hope your books arrive soon. It's a lovely idea to add in some things for you that you enjoy. I'm not very good at that- I think maybe because I never get near the end of my 'to do' list so I don't feel I deserve a treat......

@Terralee great work on the shower. Washing and garden. That's three things done, maybe the bed can wait?

I've managed to clean my bedroom, and hoover downstairs, I haven't planted my plants yet but cleaned the bathroom instead so I feel pleased. I think this thread helped me today- I wanted to be able to pop back and to have done my list. It's been quite a difficult day with a tricky teenager but I've got through it.

@peoplepleaser1 - I'm really trying to consciously do things for myself becauseI don't want to end up one of those bitter martyr types who longs for other people to notice and appreciate all their hard work and support. (Been in that position before and really didn't like how I felt.) Can you add something for yourself on today's list and let us know what it is? Then we can nudge you to do or get it. (Nicely)
Good work on the house cleaning. I need to hoover and mop downstairs. But tomorrow. Today's already busy.

We need to be nice to ourselves and we need FUN in our lives. Fun is undervalued. Maybe one of the three things on the daily list should be something we find fun. What do you all think?

@Terralee - sounds like you are turning regular showers into a habit - that is such a healthy step. Shower, washing, garden is three things so no problem if the bed doesn't get done. But maybe strip it when you get up this morning, so you have to make it by bedtime.

Today:
got to measure and order a new shower seal
going for a long walk (about 7 miles) with DH and DC which will take most of the day but DH really wants to now we're allowed to drive to somewhere pretty to walk.
Done a wash load already and will cook chorizo, roast pepper and tomato pasta when we get in from the walk. Got to make the picnic too. I think that's enough for one day. It always takes me forever to make sandwiches. I know people who put them together in 5 mins but it takes me a good half hour.

@monkeyonthetable - sounds like you have a lovely day planned! The weather is beautiful too. And you are absolutely right that something on the list has to be something enjoyable. I tend to discount myself and just think I should do endless cleaning and cooking. What are the books you have ordered? I usually buy books from the charity shops nearby and so I've really missed going there to browse during lockdown. We have a small row of shops but it has 3 charity shops and a lovely coffee shop which I often go to with a friend after we've dropped the children at school. I really miss it!

@peoplepleaser1 - well done for getting your jobs done! I agree, it is good to be able to report back. What are you planning for today?

@Terralee - sounds like you are doing well. Hope you have a good day today.

I'm just having a coffee and thinking about what my three tasks for today are. I'd really like to go to the beach, even just for a short time... but I have a work meeting at 11 (I'm not actually at work and think I might just email everyone to cancel it!)