Need an outlet and people who understand

[Strugglingalone]

Mumsnet keep deleting my threads and the last one had no reason whatsoever but the only way I am getting through at the moment is with random chat with people on here

Been struggling the last few days without a thread

Yes, that was my next question too - what's your GP like? I can't comment on medication ... did you manage to eat any of your ready meal, @Strugglingalone ?

@bangheadhere40 I have been on many too, sertraline, venlafaxine and mirtzapine were the most effective. Nurse has seen no difference in me and we are querying my disgnosis so potentially isn’t what I need anyway

Propanol only seems to work if I take it even when I don’t need it so it’s in my system 🤷‍♀️ Diazepam I’m on 5mg and that does work but I have to fight for it every time, it’s ususlly a+e or out of hours give it to me

Body is not coping with my anxiety today, I have expelled everything from my digestive system (sorry for tmi) and displaying really extreme shaking, itching etc

See I've had this. I told my doctor that it's not great but diazepam was the only thing that actually helped. They won't give it out though.. I know it's addictive, but if it helps in times like this then I think they should.

No prob about tmi....😂

Gp surgery won’t discuss my mental health, they have a contract with mh team that they just pass me back to them - since it’s been put in place I haven’t spoken to gp surgery at all, it’s made my anxiety so bad that I don’t even have a sick note for work

I had the most amazing gp who left in October, she would never have done that, I’ve lost all trust in anyone

I have a meeting with the male practice manager about it tomorrow but I’m so worked up about that I don’t even see how I can go

I had about half but now it’s all back out again (sorry tmi)

Waiting for 111 gp to call, getting a referral to the crisis team is the only option tonight

You do know that the whole setup is rubbish. I'm not sure if it's a postcode thing but it's not like that where I am ( in middle of nowhere though 😂). It's not you...it's the whole awful setup, how can you not he allowed at the doctors🤷‍♀️

I hope the call goes okay...

I might talk to you tomorrow if that's okay? I don't do much at my job but that's an awfully long story.

Glad that you have a call tonight. I hope you don't mind my saying that I really admire your perseverance, especially today, even though you shouldn't have to battle like this.

Do you want to chat generally .... think about positive things .... or anything else?

Still can't post a photograph of Cordelia.

@bangheadhere40 thanks for being there today! It’s unfortunately definitely a postcode thing and individual amazing staff can’t make up for the awful trust!

@Lobsterquadrille2 yes please, anything just to keep me occupied. Oh no!

Who is Cordelia? Is this a cat?

And no problem, I completely get it, been there in every way you describe. It's such a shame the help in place is so rubbish but you will be okay.

Haha, yes. Cordelia is nearly 15, kittenish, scared of pigeons, black and white, very long haired. Had her from an abandoned kitten.

I'm half watching something on ITV called Flesh and Blood. I'm not really a television fan, so am one of those irritating people who says "who's that?" halfway through.

Can you post a pic of the house rabbits? I have been thinking of getting some for my kids, but we had gerbils once and they wouldn't even clean them out. Are they much work to look after?

Sorry I’m wobbling, thoughts are creeping in

It's alright, no need to apologise!

I have been looking at cbt etc, I think it's basically trying to put your thoughts as just that ' thoughts'....things that are there but you can't override sometimes. They aren't fact though.

Will you get your call back soon do you think?

Had an automated call back that said they are too busy so doubt I’ll even get one

@bangheadhere40 is it better to swim along with negative thoughts, knowing that they will pass - or to try to kind of override them with kore positive thoughts?

Hello again everyone x
I fell asleep on the sofa whoops! Would blame my meds but more likely I'm just a lazy so and so ;)

I agree with Lobster, you are being so strong and brave to engage repeatedly with your team (when you're not getting what you need) and other sources of help.

Do you feel like you could disclose your diagnosis? I'm totally perplexed by your GP protocol! That sounds discrimination at best :(

That is rubbish! I am astounded how bad the whole setup is, like you say the odd good person can't help the whole messed up system, which just makes people feel worse......when they get an automated message back.

You are doing your best to try and get help, it really isn't anything to do with you the whole system is so messed up. You obviously have a lot if determination which is great....you should be proud of yourself for going to the apt, calling tonight, I'm just so sad the whole system is such a let down for people. It's nothing personal about you...you are doing great by persevering x

Just depression and anxiety

I’m querying ptsd, bipolar (think this is most suitable) or autism but not getting anywhere fast

@lobster I am in a similar situation so I don't know the answer from a professional viewpoint. From what I find helps with me though is not to suppress the thoughts as you feel worse....but try and acknowledge and accept it for what it is, you have to feel what you feel.

I think viewing it as 'thoughts ' helps, before I read that I was so consumed by it I thought it was me and that's who I am, but if you can separate the 'thoughts' as just thoughts I think that helps. I don't believe trying to force yourself to be positive helps necessarily, but trying to look at things rationally ( easier said than done).

This is just my opinion....x

@struggling you seem very self aware which is great. If people were more competent you shouldn't have to self diagnose....I think you have every right to feel let down by the whole system.

I think depression and anxiety are too loosely phrased....and it's not one diagnosis fits all....

@bangheadhere40 thank you, that makes a lot of sense. I have a friend in a very similar situation - negative thoughts consuming her at times - and it's always helpful to understand what can be of assistance.

I'm going to say good night to you all, but am around tomorrow for any kind of chat that will help @Strugglingalone .

I am and I’m not, I can’t name any emotions, I can’t say how I am feeling, I only hear thoughts or possibly my voice - I’m not entirely sure!

Really struggling again but don’t know what to do

Don't worry OP, no one is trying to minimise what you are going through or your symptoms.

Sorry to keep banging on about this but you have any coping strategies that work for you? Tv, baths, mumsnet, relaxing apps, YouTube etc. Even self damaging actions are ok if you are in a crisis and it's keeping your life safe. Do you understand what I'm getting at?

Yes, I have a box of tactile distractions to keep my hands busy, I watch catch up and I’ve been self harming daily in the last few days although not the most traditional sense

Nobody believes I can’t understand my emotions, I get so confused the more they are talked about