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Am addicted to spending - please help

64 replies

theworstaddiction · 11/08/2007 19:53

Am regular, changed name for this

Am typing quickly as dh upstairs.

Pls help as really am struggling to find a source of help. I know am stupid sad awful cow. But am addicted to spending on credit cards. Have racked up thousands and dh has coped with it but have done it again and will throw me out. 3 kids pleas.e Can anyone tell me where to go/ I know it is my fault but feel like I am an alocholic or drug addict.

OP posts:
domesticgrumpess · 31/08/2007 13:20

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theworstaddiction · 31/08/2007 13:27

Thanks for that Domestic - I've really always fancied making stuff but have no real skills.....once the kids are back at school I may have a bit more time, and I have an old Singer.

I am really trying to take a day at a time. Today I was so tempted as had about 2 hours to myself (3 kids farmed out whilst at docs) and all I could think to do was shop, otherwise it was going home to housework again and again and aganin.

Am also trying to get p/t job and keep myself busy with my OU degree which kicks off again soon. Its when I have a window of space to myself.......

OP posts:
MellowMa · 31/08/2007 13:31

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theworstaddiction · 31/08/2007 13:35

Really Mellow, I seriously thought I would be alone. Wanna crack it this time, its ruining my life.

OP posts:
MellowMa · 31/08/2007 13:41

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MellowMa · 31/08/2007 13:42

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theworstaddiction · 31/08/2007 13:43

He seemed more concerned this time to lift my mood. I could hardly talk - so silly. He wants to see me in two weeks. He said when my mood lifts we can talk about tackling the spending. He did say that once this sort of thing is out in the open it is 'relatively easy' to sort, which I was surprised at.

He said there would be some issues as to why I did it and talked about CBT.

OP posts:
theworstaddiction · 31/08/2007 13:45

Do you think there is a reason you do it? I have some ideas about me, but they all sound pathetic, and well, like excuses. My dh thinks they are defo excuses.

OP posts:
MellowMa · 31/08/2007 13:53

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theworstaddiction · 31/08/2007 13:55

I think if the spending is on credit cards it doesn't feel like real money - part of the problem for me.

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expatinscotland · 31/08/2007 13:55

Get addicted to selling!

theworstaddiction · 31/08/2007 14:01

Am ebaying lots of stuff at the mo, lots more to go.......hoping to throw it all against the credit cards.

OP posts:
xyzabc · 31/08/2007 15:11

contact lenders and tell them your posistion. arrange smaller payments that you can keep to & dont spend anymore. if you get fed up (as we all do) go for a fcuking walk! youll get fit at the same time ! dont tell dh unless you really have to. but stop spending 2day, its all a poxy load of crap anyway. just buy what u need, you know, food and regular household bills. and buy kids cloths from primark, all the well funky mums do these days. good luck.x x

tyaca · 07/09/2007 20:41

hey me too. but clothes not the main problem, they come second to online gambling ... 4 months preg with first. no idea how we will cope without my income. 7k on credit cards and 5k on loand plus am self employed and behind on tax.

keep holding off the chat with husband, but know it will have to happen. he knows and is ok -ish but we still haven't had the big chat. we will go thru my finances and he's basically agreed to take all my cards (inc for my current account) and give me small amounts of cash weekly.

really grateful for him for taking the responsibility off me. i am 30 going 12 ... but we still haven't had chat and when he tried to bring it up other day himself, he did it in an angry way, not like him at all and i went thru roof. screamed and cried and took couple of days to get ok again. so hard to face up to it all

don't blame yourself, not a sign of moral weakness. i notice real patterns, like montly ones etc and (bull sh t) alert, full moon seems to really set me off . and it's strange 'cause sometimes its so controllable and no urge at all, other times i just blow hundreds and know it won't stop.

i think its like drugs, because other people presumably most of the time feel like i do that five percent of the time when i really don't have urge to gamble/spend.

it really really is ok. know i'm not onw to talk, but will be ok. what i most regret now is that if i'd stopped earlier, by now i could at least be spending a bit of cash. does that make sense? like the main reason i'm so broke now is cause i've been spending like i don't have large amounts of debts already to pay off

good luck

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