Anxiety support, Hand hold or chit chat come say hi #2

[Fairydust26]

Hi everyone this is part 2 as the original thread is full up! But as the title says this thread is support for all that are struggling and could do with a handhold and a chit chat so come and say hello😊.

Well done EmbracetheChaos!
The weather helps, today I sat in the sunshine for a few minutes and felt lovely 😀

That’s great and glad to hear your still doing well Embracethechaos.

I too enjoyed a few hours out in the sun a nice dose of vitamin D😊.

Glad to hear you're all doing good.

Just feeling bad about my nct WhatsApp group, the oldest mum is struggling and I didn't know the right thing to say, so posted some selfish sounding waffle. It's nice actually going to the meetings, I thought I said something really stupid once but on a later group I realised noone remembered. WhatsApp is recorded so I can look back and cringe. I just left my work group in strop after a meeting with my manager, muting notifications wasn't good enough. I think I'll be OK just not posting on the group.

Hope you are all doing well.
I am surprisingly in the up, this time last week I was seriously struggling.
Aside from propanalol I had an acupuncture session and also saw a homeopathic doctor.
I think both helped me, the acupuncture focused on my stomach as they say that is the Centre and emotions are controlled from there according to eastern medicine, I think there is something about that.
Homeopathic doctor gave me a remedy again I think it helps.
Looking forward to my therapy starting next week tough, I think that will help more.

Longlunch glad to hear your doing well!😊I totally agree with anxiety being in the stomach sometimes it’s my stomach that picks up on anxiety before my brain does.

They used to think the same in the west before scientific research. The sympathetic nervous system which creates the stress response is controlled by a very primative part of our brain that is instinctive and we have little control over. The opposite of 'fight and flight' response is the 'rest and digest' response. So yes, they've found that when you're constantly on edge and not relaxed your body doesn't digest as that's not important for immediate survival (running away from a lion). Most of us don't have to run away from predators so we just get anxiety instead. That's why excersise is so good for your mental health as it uses all the stress hormones, releases endorfins. I've never tried acupuncture, never appealed to me but if it helps you, that's great. An anethatist I know does steroid injections on the NHS and acupuncture privately. He's well educated and believes it works so I changed my mind a bit. He's also disabled so tried lots of alternative therapies himself, makes him a good doctor when he's had the treatments his patients are going through I think.

Yep same here. Before i went to GPI'd some times feel sick but there was nothing physcailly wrong. I'd just feel like there was a block or something in my stomach.
Glad to hear you're doing well.
I'm being to think I didn't get the job I wanted. The 2nd rounds of interviews ended last Friday and I've heard nothing back. I need Garda(,police) clearance for it so unless they are waiting for that to clear.
The other job are still interviewing so don't know when I'll here about that.
I never had to fill out the Garda Clearance link before I got a job before so I had taken that as a good sign.
Ah well it clearly wasn't meant to be.

Okay so I was a little premature in my thinking. Got a phone call this evening and I have been offered my first choice job.

Well done larla!!!!

Congratulations!!

larla wow that’s great news congrats!!.

Thanks everyone. I have to go in at 11 on the 26th to talk more about it. I don't know what I'm going to say to my current boss.

This is ridiculous. Been awake most of the night worrying about asking my boss for the morning off on the 26th. I feel I've had a lot of half days and days off recently although I haven't taken time off before this really.
Also what can she do really. I'll be leaving soon enough. I just hate to feel like I'm letting people down even though my boss doesn't really care about other people's feeling too much. That's part of the reason why with my departure she'll have lost 5 staff members since May 2017. 4 since November.

larla if your not comfortable telling your boss it’s for your new job could you say it’s for a medical appointment or something similar?.

Yeah that's what I'm to say. I am not lying if I say I have an appointment. I do have one. One of girls who's been here a long time told me to say that I need the morning off. No explain.

Me and my dh had a cry together last night, well I cried first. I felt better after but woke up with a headache all over this morning which went slowly with lots of water, a bit of paracetamol and coffee. Dh had 3 expressos b4 work... I asked if he was going to crash in an hour as I always notice the crash more than the boost with coffee. At least its Friday. Lol. Childbirth is just very iminant. Just had a mh appointment, discussed possibly increasing meds or doing talking therapy. I said I didn't want the increase, until at least after my hormones have settled after birth. She asked if I'd want to now or after birth...the other option would be talking therapy with dh which I'd like. I have tried to persuade my oh to do couples councilling counselling but he's refused. I'm feeling pretty stressed about having more meetings now, needing to have a plan and having daily visits postnatals. My dh is a very private person, like my key worker said today... He'll have to step up. During my pregnancy it's all been on me, he's been supporting at the sidelines. At our nct classes the men are all stressed about becoming dads, it started for the women 8 months ago. I'm currently enjoying a mcflurrey on town, feeling a lot better now my headake has gone. Has anyone else had talking therapy with their partner? How did you find it, I'm thinking it would be really awkward, or patronising, my me helpful if the councoler is helpful. Social services are always at the back of my mind... I know that they are there for support but my dh has deep rooted anxieties about them so I want to avoid if possible. Just feeling overwelmed, wanting to escape.

EmbracetheChaos, I have not had talking therapy with DH but had it for myself and found it very helpful.
I would say give it a try, if the therapist is good it will not be patronising or anything, they are trained to deal with these situations.
Sending you love, childbirth is quite stressful
Is this your first DC? Sorry cannot remember if you mentioned it already.

Yes, it is longlunch. Its was a bit of a confusing meeting tbh. I didn't take any notes and it was with a care coordinator, passing on messages. My dh agrees with not increasing meds right now... Its a new anti-psychotics medication, I like it better than any other psychoactive medication but... There's not much research on pregnant women. I was on no medication until half way through my pregnancy and in the risk assessment in my notes my only risk is lack of accepting treatment...I didn't take my prescription citalopram from the obstiatrician as it was too similar to setraline. I get paranoid about health professionals sometimes, I'm too much of a control freak and don't like that they discussions about me without me, even though I know it's good for my care. I'll try not to overthink it and enjoy my maternity leave. I'm seeing my care coordinator again next Friday. We mostly have good weekly conversations but other people in the team I didn't gell with so feel anxious around them which doesn't show what I'm normally like... I think I'm just trying to live up to expectations too much.

Sleep is the main issue for me, care coordinator said I need my night sleeps even with a newborn, dh is keen to do night feeds and works in a school so we have a lovely summer to look forward to. It seems hard to explain that I have a lot of social support.

My DC are not babies any more, but I can agree that sleep is a main issue. A few weeks ago my DC had a few nights of waking up with nightmares and the lack of sleep combined with very busy week sent me into mental chaos. So I sympathise.
Yes you will need not only nights, but any opportunity you can take to nap.
At least your DH will have the summer off work.
Try to go with the flow and not have many expectations, other than enjoy every moment you can with the new family.
Is good that you have support
But do not beat yourself if with all the support you still feel down sometimes, is hard isn’t it?

Embracethechaos even without MH issues becoming a parent for the first is scary. 18 almost 19 years on I still cry at everything. Christmas ads are the worst. I wasn't like that before I had DS.
The best bit of advice I got was to sleep when baby sleeps. Don't worry about the house work or anything.
It's not easy but that's what I did.
It's great that you'll have your DP there and that he is willing to do night feeds.

Thanks both, nct classes have been very helpful as all first time parents are stressed and anxious, whether or not they have diagnosed mental health issues, made me feel more normal, allthough I've had psychosis before, but never been sectioned, when I went on setraline around the time I did my pregnancy test (planned pregnancy but was not in the best headspace) when I couldn't sleep I was very anxious about being sectioned during pregnancy. Well, I've nearly made it to the end of pregnancy, then the midwife mentioned the posibility of be being sectioned post nataly and those fears are back. I know it's best to think about these things before the baby arrives.

I’m glad I found this thread. I have anxiety and it got so bad a couple of years back that I went to my GP and was referred for some CBT sessions. I had them throughout most of last year and they ended in January. I think I’ve got some good techniques now for dealing with it but I’m not always successful at implementing them. I’ve also recently become pregnant again and my hormones have been all over the place which doesn’t help. Generally, I go through phases where I’m completely overwhelmed by anxiety but I’ll really try to look after myself and be kind, then the next day I’m totally frustrated with the whole thing and have no time for it and the voice in my head just shouts “pull yourself together, you pathetic idiot” incessantly.

Hi Notevenmyrealname. I started do8ng some breathing excersise. Found out by accident while doing it at work that it helps. Although sometimes it makes me a little dizzy.