Anxiety support, Hand hold or chit chat come say hi #2

[Fairydust26]

Hi everyone this is part 2 as the original thread is full up! But as the title says this thread is support for all that are struggling and could do with a handhold and a chit chat so come and say hello😊.

[Fairydust26]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feeling_depressed/3396889-Anxiety-support-Hand-hold-or-chit-chat-come-say-hi-3?watched=1

[Fairydust26]

Okay ladies new thread is done see you over there!

[BippityBoppity87]

Okie dokie Fairydust26 I'm feeling a lot better today. Just been reading through my posts over the last month and I've realised just how up and down I've really been. It's kind of like my online mood diary! It's been insightful and helpful, although I haven't been able to pin point what's going on just yet.

[Fairydust26]

The threads almost full up but fear not I shall make a new one in a little while...unless I fall asleep in that case I will make it on the morning. Had terrible anxiety these past few days I know it’s bad when I have no appetite and I could cry at anything, have such a horrible heavy feeling in my chest and feel so drained with it.

Sorry to see some of you are struggling hugs to you all

[BippityBoppity87]

Thank you Stilllivinginazoo vikingwoman

I actually had a really good day at work today. I know they're going to be a bit angsty. What makes me feel even worse, as my DP kindly pointed out, that my session could have gone to someone else not helpful to say to someone's who already has anxiety issues I suppose it's true.

I was very lucky that I didn't have to wait long to start the sessions as I've heard it can be quite a long waiting list. And the fact I saw a psychiatrist pretty much the next day when I was in crisis, which I know can take months as well. Luckily I haven't had to see him recently, only the two talks I had with him, although my CBT sessions are in the same building.

I've only had two, so maybe it's early days, but being brutally honest, right now, no I'm not finding it particularly helpful.

[vikingwoman]

I'm sorry, Bippity - I hope tomorrow's a better day. You managed another workday which is terrific. Good for you!

Zoo - I know those feelings...you're not alone. I still used to resent DP assuming my kids' issues were his family genes (glaringly obvious). I'm waking up to the fact that their anxiety issues are me to a T, and I feel so guilty. I sometimes enable younger DS as I can't always manage him. Then I feel more guilty. I do it to maintain some calm in the house, or because he can wear me down with his negotiations. We try our best, and that's all we can do. Your children know how much you love them.

[Stilllivinginazoo]

The only thing they can be bit antsy over is not letting the know.you had a bad leg so you have a good reason lovely
Are you finding CBT very stressful or helpful?

I'm not having a great day.feel very agitated and anxious tonight.my D's not good at mo with anxiety and it's been a stressful time try manage him,feeling guilty I may have caused it or passed on in genes and try manage rest my family

[BippityBoppity87]

How is everyone this evening? I had a bit of a wobble last night, almost didn't go into work and wanted to take all my pills. Thankfully my DP stopped me and hid them. I don't know what made me want to do that.

And I'm getting increasingly anxious with my upcoming appointment with CBT. I know I'm going to get told off for not going last week.

[vikingwoman]

Ooh, thanks for the suggestion Zoo. Will follow him!

[Stilllivinginazoo]

Oooh,do you follow the boy wanders on Instagram?some amazing scenery there to soak upViking
love a good view to escape into myself

[vikingwoman]

Zoo - I don't smoke either and no longer drink. I used to have the odd glass of wine but stopped when I increased my AD's. Coffee helps get me through the day . I also have a terrible sweet tooth and used to use that as comfort food. Still do on occasions but not as often. Now that I'm over 50 and at the weight I want to be - I know I'll sabotage my efforts with the previous chocolate habits I used to have!
Best thing that currently works for me is actually creative visualization - basically imagine I'm somewhere else! I do this when I'm walking sometimes, or I have an instagram account where I only follow accounts of serene/magical/beautiful places around the world. I don't follow friends, just lovely places. This is probably why I sometimes like asking people (like you) about their surroundings.
At night when DS2 falls asleep I like to watch something light on Netflix while putting on skincare.

[Stilllivinginazoo]

Viking pre D's issues I occasionally spent an afternoon with dd2 watching girlie film and pampering ourselves(paint toenails,hair and face pack,manicure )
These days I don't get more than 20mins of D's in bed at night whilst I eat tea with her,so it's sneaked moments to paint toes,read 10mins,hot shower or cook comforting dinners as my self cares rubbish tbh and I wouldn't do any of these things without mental reminders .I try to be mindful in at least one of school runs for lil zoo as we cross a protected area for wildlife and a few minutes appreciating the landscape at least clears my mind.haeder now D's is in tow but I tend to say out loud what I see and he's finding that a bit grounding
I don't drink or smoke but have a shockingly bad sweet tooth and chocolate/sweets hold me up when nothing else can
What do you like to do?

[vikingwoman]

Bippity - wonderful you managed to go to work today! Hopefully you'll get some well-deserved rest tonight and who knows...perhaps do even better tomorrow.

Zoo - loved your last paragraph . Hey, making it by the skin of our teeth is still a win! What sort of self care do you like to do when you have the time?

[BippityBoppity87]

I managed to go to work today, even being a bit wobbly with my knee. I thought I was ok, if maybe just a bit tired as I only managed to get about 2 hours sleep last night.

Then a customer asked me if I was ok, I said fine? Why do I not look ok? No you don't look ok. I don't know what vibes I give off, but I felt fine to me. Unless I'm acting like Ross from Friends 'I'M FINE!' 😂

This is the third stranger in the past 3 months who has asked me this question with a really concerned look on their face, which is now making me feel really self conscious!

[Stilllivinginazoo]

Tired tonight as I check in.ds anxiety been very bad but I pushed him very hard and he hung in there both for choir practise and at church today.poor bean was trembling and panicking.i am SUPER PROUD of him dont think I'm that brave
Need to up my self care this week as I start feel meh and dark mornings won't help improve this(in summer I'm up at silly o'clock with the birds doing stuff)

Hope everyone had either a productive,calm or I held it together by the skin of my teeth weekend and are ready for the week ahead!

[Fairydust26]

Thanks vikingwoman still feel abit meh but Im sure it will soon pass. BippityBoppity87 glad to hear your feeling abit better how’s everyone’s weekend been hope your all doing well?.

[BippityBoppity87]

I am doing a lot better, I still drink way too much, which I'm aware of. I've drank the best part of 2 bottles of gin over the past two days. But tonight I'm not having the hallucinations, or want to end it all. Which is a win for me.

[vikingwoman]

Fairy - glad to hear you are feeling better. I can get stuck overanalyzing things too.

Bippity - hope you continue to feel stronger too.

[BippityBoppity87]

How is everyone feeling this evening? I'm feeling a lot better but now.

[BippityBoppity87]

Not really Iblinkedandiamold I've just wanted to stay in bed all day. I don't think the sertraline is working. It's making my mood's swing very up and down. More downs than ups though. And I just feel an absolute mess.

[Iblinkedandiamold]

Glad to hear it. Sometimes a good cry is cleansing.

[Fairydust26]

Thank you Iblinkedandiamold feeling abit better now that’s good that your son is in contact again little by little you’ll get there hopefully your relationship will be back to how it was soon.

[Iblinkedandiamold]

Sorry to hear that fairy.
I'm Doing okay. DS answered my texts last night. Okay his replies were short and he usually says "I love you" when he signs off and he didnt this time but it's a start. Had a terrible night though because I had a small bit of chocolate cake at work. Time to face facts, Me and Dairy do not mix.
Just back from the park run. Got changed into my Pjs.

[Fairydust26]

Feeling really down in the dumps today overthinking and overanalysing life even had a little sob but I’m blaiming it partly on hormones! how’s everyone else doing today?.

[Iblinkedandiamold]

I am not a physcolgist but from reading up on depressing you do sound like you could have bi-polar. I don't know though.
Are you any better today? It must be such an anxious and confusing time for you.
Thinking of you.