Just wondered if anyone with PTSD/Complex PTSD fancied a chat?

[pepsiandshirley]

I've accepted I'min this for the longish haul, have a great therapist, get out and do plenty of exercise, spend time in green spaces, stay positive etc etc.

But I'd just love to speak to someone/anyone else who understands what a bitch trauma is (any kind, whatever the cause - trauma is trauma!)

Thanks dream, not heard of insighttimer, whats that. Had hiccups this evening which has been a wonderful distraction. DH is beating himself up as he feels its his fault because his illness caused my PTSD which isn't helpful for either of us. I'm knitting, which I find thereputic, and distracting.

Hi all,

Just a quick one before I go to bed - nolonger I keep meaning to ask if your DH is ok now? I know you've mentioned that your PTSD came as a result of incident with him being unwell. Just wondered how he was and if that's more for you to cope with, or if you are able to focus on yourself?

Glad you are enjoying your knitting, I am terrible at knitting, would love to be able to do it properly!

Also quick update on me - we were away on holiday last week and I was really hypervigilant but feeling so much better now I'm home in my usual surroundings.

Also, huge therapy breakthrough today - I went through memories of a traumatic childhood attack today and the difference between how I felt today compared to how I felt going through a similar one three months ago was immense...When we did it in January I went for a run strsight afterwards and seriously considered drowning myself in the lake I was running round it was so awful. Today, it was bad, but nowhere near that bad - maneagable. I feel like I can really feel the progress I'm making. Yeay!

Nolonger I can kind of see this from your DH's point of you (don't want to out myself), just wondering if he has ever had counselling or if it's something he would consider just to talk through the guilt factor. It may help him to feel more at ease (peace?) with what he is feeling as blame.
What are you knitting?

Pepsi That's HUGE progress! Well done you - I am a big fan of running, particularly when things get tough. My therapist tells me this is my "running away" instinct coming out to play - I tell her she really doesn't get running. She's not a runner, my GP on the other hand, totally gets the awesomeness of running and that it doesn't equate to wanting to run away!

I also suck at knitting, would love to learn. And to sew, that's another thing I wish I could do!

Thank you creating I don't feel 100% today, but nowhere near as anxious/broken as I did about this 3 months ago. Maybe I am getting somewhere. I don't know, I spend so much time thinking about the past in therapy I feel like I'm stuck there sometimes.

My therapist is very pro me running as well, I totally agree on the headspace thing. Do you run much? I try to run 3 x a week and I'm in a club...don't do many races, though, furthest I've done is a couple of HMs. What about you?

Hey - sorry you're not having good days today

But Pepsi it does sound like definite improvement.

I don't think running necessarily equates to running away either, running is amazing. Just to clear your head, it releases all those necessary happy chemicals in your brain.
I used to run all the time!

pepsi DH is well at the moment and has a great team supporting him, but could have a relapse, so just knowing that it could all happen again is tough. He does generally need more support than the average DH too to keep him well. Its been a bit of a role reversal whilst I've been ill, he's found it really tough. Really glad that you've had a breakthrough in your therapy.

Dream we are waiting to start family therapy to look at how DHs condition affects both of us and our relationship, so I'm hoping it will be adressed as part of that. He also has a CPN he sees weekly who he can discuss any issues with. I'm knitting toys for a charity at the moment.

kansas I would take the points in your post as a starting point for what to discuss with your GP. I think that its part of our protective mechanism with trauma to minimise how bad it was to ourselves. Your GP may be able to help you acess other services, you won't know what until you see them. The flashbacks are typical of trauma, I also found anxiety, pannic attacks and dissociation as well as problems with my concentration and memory.

kansas some of the other stuff like the difficulty with food, sensory overload sounds more ASD like.

kansas I would print off your post and take that, minus the bits where you are asking us questions.

Flashbacks for me can go to bad times, or good times just before/after the bad times (as I a dissociative disorder), or they can go to times where I was retraumatised or in a flashback situation.

I think it's best to talk it through with a professional before you start putting labels to anything, so explain the symptoms rather than naming them as these illnesses are quite complex and symptoms can overlap but be caused by entirely different things.

I would definitely make sure you stick with a regular GP you are comfortable with once you say something though - it's difficult to form that relationship but it's really important to (my GP surgery insist all patients with mh difficulties have a relationship with one GP and are reviewed as necessary by that GP).

Good luck xx

I think flashbacks can take different forms for different people. Mine tend to be emotional. Other people have visual or auditory. The flooding in of information sounds familiar. For me its like sudenly without warning having all the emotions of the trauma slammed into my body with force. It can then last for hours.

Are the appointments two separate ones, or is it a double appointment?

Do you know if the GP has a special interest in mental health?

creating yes my employer should give me time off for appointments but my long term illness last year as a result of my PTSD meant I lost my previous job so I've had to take temporary work which pays less. If I don't go to work I don't get paid.
The distance I'm currently travelling to my work in one direction and the distance to my appointments in the other mean that I would have to take a day off a week and I simply can't afford to.

kaff my mental health team have made me a referral for psychology intervention but the appointments are only available until 4 on weekdays so for the reasons above I can't make the appointments.

WeAreNot my 'flashbacks' can be real flashbacks or they can be a mixture of experiences, over different decades. Sometimes they are a series of images spliced together from different decades like old celluloid editing. Sometimes they are like nightmares ie previous events happening in different times, places or to other people I know, like a dream. That's why I use the terms 'nightmares' and 'daymares' because they are often like nightmares but I can have them in the day or the night. Even in the day they are very odd and all encompassing.

My PTSD is not a result of childbirth, I do have children but mine are older and mine started much later. A lot of the books discussed on this thread seem geared towards traumatic childbirth, does anyone know of any good books about PTSD which is not birth related? Preferably books which offer ways to help, rather than just a discussion of PTSD believe me I could write a book on it myself

I've just found and read most of this thread and I am completely stunned. For years I have been considered to have depression and anxiety stemming from a pretty brutal childhood including long term sexual abuse and periods of rape in my teenage years. I identify with so many experiences here and I feel like my understanding of my problems has been completely shook. I am pregnant and have been back to talking therapy to try and work through some issues and fears relating to labour and birth and I just feel like I've had to relive the trauma of abuse over and over, my flashbacks and disassociation are so much worse, hypervigilance has me absolutely exhausted and I break out in to a huge anxiety attack every time I think about the birth of this (much wanted) baby, I'm so sure I am going to go through all this trauma again if I have to go through a natural birth where I feel violated and vulnerable. I hope it's okay to piggyback here when I don't have a PTSD diagnosis, I'm going to go back and finish reading the thread now. I felt compelled to join you.

Thumbs:

This book might help; I read the overcoming anxiety one.

www.overcoming.co.uk/single.htm?ipg=4839

Another free resource:

www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/posttrauma.asp

I don't find the last link hugely helpful though.

I had Cognitive analytical therapy which was useful but helped me work out I had a form of trauma. There's a big book you can get to work through.

Marbelous, I found the body keeps the score hugely helpful to read. It's not childbirth related. I think there are a few of us with complex ptsd from childhood who then also had traumatic birth experiences and some who had standalone childbirth issues..

Thumbs - welcome, you certainly s

Sound as though you belong here and I'm sorry to hear of your experiences.

I had an ELCS with my second baby on mental health grounds - if you want to explore that I'm happy to discuss the process I went through to get mine..

Been for my IEMT appointment and feeling miles better. Been advised to avoid talking about the details of the trauma in the future, so will be more cautious. To be honest though the memories I dealt with today are ones that have returned since my last session, so I dont think had been fully dealt with iyswim. It was a harder session today and took more work to unpick, but I do think this was the worst bit of the trauma. So hopefully now thats dealt with I can move forward.

I still highly recommend IEMT/ Eye Movement Integration to anyone for PTSD.