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Winter in the village - support for all kinds of MH issues - depression, anxiety, OCD, psychosis, bipolar...

916 replies

creamhearts · 18/12/2014 21:17

I know the thread is a bit dead but I thought I would start a new one and see if we can keep it going xx

OP posts:
ColouringInQueen · 18/12/2014 22:33

Well done cream I wasn't ready to leave the village. P.S I am confused - am I right in thinking you used to be silvery?

Well another fantastically tumultuous day here. Good day painting Smile then came home to find out DH's frail 80 year old dad is seriously ill in hosp. Can't begin to tell you how much I need him to stay alive.

Pyrrhagena · 19/12/2014 05:16

Thanks cream.

Always get to get up so early snowy 'tis when the children get up. Yawn. I'm permanently knackered!

Great about the painting ciq, sorry to hear about your FIL, hope he recovers soon. Cream was fluffy.

TheSilveryPussycat · 19/12/2014 11:10

Hi, I think some went to another long thread that was running.

Still trying to finish getting Christmas sorted - and to find a balance that will keep my sleep good, and still get me up in the morning. But generally all well with me.

Sorry to hear about your FIL, CIQ.

Shannaratiger · 19/12/2014 12:55

Hi everyone can I please join your village - if I can stop crying enough to type.

Feeling really emotionaly drained and need to clear the tears and tension before picking the kids up. A medicinal giant chocolate cake is currently in the oven!

CIQ sorry to hear about your FIL, bad time of year to lose a loved one.

My basic problems are that I suffer with dyspraxia and epilepsy, which is under control with medication but does come back abit if i get really tired or stressed. Dd suffers with dyspraxia, dyslexia, dyscalcula and ASD. Dp has bad dyslexia and is really depressed, largely due to an abusive childhood that he can't / won't deal with. he just wants to shut himself away and we're all walking on egg shells so as not to upset him. Finally Ds I think is suffering with ODD although he just about keeps control in school and around Dh.
The more tired I get the more i forget things and muddle everything up. e.g. wrote friends christmas card and forgot to write our names; booked Dh's holiday from Monday to Sunday rather than Saturday to friday meaning he's working both christmas sundays, and so we can't go to my family's (not that he wants to go anyway)! Always saying I'll do things with Ds and immediately forgetting. Dd understands but ds doesn't and loses it, usually resulting in beating me up and being inconsolubly upset.

I just feel like I'm by the edge of a deep black well and sliding closer all the time. i really need to keep it together for Dh and the kids because they can't cope at all without me there. The kids won't let Dh do anything as our roles are really strictly defined in both their heads - including making them a drink, bowl of cereal. They can just about cope with him washing up if we do it together.

Sorry for the big boring post but it does feel abit better just saying it! Confused

SnowyMouse · 19/12/2014 13:23

Hi all, everyone's welcome. Smile

TheSilveryPussycat · 19/12/2014 14:10

Welsome, tiger - from your description, no wonder you have got overwhelmed. Forgetting things when under pressure is normal, though a sign that something needs to change. How old are your DC?

Shannaratiger · 19/12/2014 14:13

Dd is 10 and Ds is 8. Ds is the one who wants me to do everything and won't even try and gets really angry if i even ask him to carry his own school bag!! Dd tries evn if she can't manage some things.

TheSilveryPussycat · 19/12/2014 14:47

It sounds like your DC are ruling the roost, somewhat. I know they have difficulties, but this is doing them no favours in the long run. Have you posted on the relevant boards here about these problems, where you can get support from others facing similar child rearing issues?

Is your DH receiving treatment for his depression? What happens if any of you accidentally tread on one of those eggshells? How does his "upset" manifest itself?

Sorry for all the questions...

MySpideySenseTickles · 19/12/2014 19:28

I'm here, not feeling up to posting so just marking place for now.
I thought everyone had left the village, I was sad. Sad

ColouringInQueen · 19/12/2014 19:57

Hi Shanna Welcome. That sounds like a really tough situation. It's sooo busy at this time, everyone forgets stuff. I have multiple lists on the go, but even driving home from sains I remembered several things I'd forgotten. I am planning to have a chat with DH and my DCs about helping over the holidays as I am already completely exhausted. Seriously though, if you got the flu (proper flu) they would have to help wouldn't they?

Hi spidey thinking of you.

Hi *silvery, snowy, pyrrh, cream (that's right) nice to hear from you all. Thanks for messages re: FIL. DH is visiting him now. Me and DCs have just had a fish and chip picnic. DD is running a temperature. I need to get them to bed - I hate doing bedtime.

TheSilveryPussycat · 19/12/2014 22:35

tiger reading my last post back, it seems to have a harsh undertone, which was not my intention. From your original post, I was wondering if your DH's depression was sort of the vortex at the centre of your family, kind of distorting how it should function.

so I am sending warm wishes, my only advice atm: eat, keep hydrated, and sleep...

Collardove · 19/12/2014 23:41

I found you all! :) xx

Pulledapart · 20/12/2014 12:40

Yay I found u all Smile

Hope everyone is doing ok today will try catch up later xxx

ColouringInQueen · 20/12/2014 14:24

hi collar, pulled how are things with you?
I think I must have some sort of lurgy on top of the general exhaustion - feel really rough today. dh gone to visit fil. I have to drive kids to a friends for an hour then go pick up dh and help kids decorate mil tree. highlight of day so far has been sitting at table for lunch Hmm

SnowyMouse · 20/12/2014 15:04

How is everyone? I hope that you make it through your busy day, CiQ, and the lurgy disappears.

creamhearts · 20/12/2014 16:02

Hi everyone, I have been busy this week which has been nice. I have not SIed in over a week now which is really good I think.

Hope you feel better soon CIQ

Thinking of you spidey xx

OP posts:
NanaNina · 20/12/2014 16:20

Hello villagers - it's definitely time for a new thread. Nice to see so many regulars and welcome Tiger - my god it sounds tough for you - is there anyone looking after YOU? or is that a silly question. Is your DP getting any help with the depression - meds? I don't really know what dyspraxia is, nor ODD but it sounds like you have too much on your plate - why won't the kids let their dad do anything for them?

I am struggling with a chest infection - managed to collapse in GP surgery last Friday and they sent for the paramedics and ambulance and ended up in A & E (nightmare) eventually put on ward and discharged next day. Been on ABX all week but feel like a limp lettuce. GP came out to see me yesterday (she's lovely) and I've known her a long time. Says chest is much better but am still coughing. Have to have blood test on Monday and feel flat and miserable...........otherwise ok!

Sorry to moan as I know we all have tough times. So glad you are better creamhearts and spidey I saw your other post and so sorry you had such a nasty shock - hope you're managing to stay on an even keel, though not easy I know. CIQ take care - you might have a lergy - my GP said yesterday that they saw 60 "extras" patients yesterday, many with chest infections/flu etc.

Hi Collardove pulled silvery Snowy pyrrgh - not sure if anyone is looking forward to Christmas but I'm certainly not! I don't like Christmas at the best of times......will be sending DP over to our son's house on Cmas day as he needs a break from me! Will go as well if I feel well enough but doubt it. I know most of you have young kids so have to "come up with it" and I really do feel for you all.

MySpideySenseTickles · 20/12/2014 17:24

I typed a long response but something happened when I clicked post and it didn't post.
Don't have the energy to type again.
I'm on a pretty even level at the mo, it's an incredibly low level, where I SHd hurts ratger a lot and I'm a bit freaked out because tonight ds is staying with his aunties and "d"h is out with work, at least he says he is...
I'm going to watch tv and distract myself, I've bought some yummy naughty treats and I'm going to get what I need for the even ing and lock the kitchen door, I can't trust myself in there alone at the moment. Too many sharp things. Sad

FaithLoveandGrace · 20/12/2014 18:35

Hi all, may I join you please?

Feeling very triggered this evening and wanting to SH. DP is in bed ill (he has flu) so I can't even cuddle up to him. I'd love to write more but don't have the strength right now so instead hoping to take refuge in this warm, safe village.

Love and hugs to all who are struggling this evening.

MySpideySenseTickles · 20/12/2014 18:51

Welcome faith I want to SH too, how about we make a pact, I'll get through tonight with no SH if you will?

SnowyMouse · 20/12/2014 18:52

Welcome faith Smile

I hope your distractions work, spidey

(((( NN )))) I hope your infection gets knocked on the head, sounds nasty Sad

Well done on making it over a week, cream

FaithLoveandGrace · 20/12/2014 19:02

spidey - the pact sounds good. I know deep down it's not good to SH. I know when I do I just end up spiralling and making things worse. I can't even hide it if I do slip up over the weekend as DP and I are potentially going swimming next week so he'll definitely find out. But, we can do this. Your naughty treats sounds good :) I bought some stollen for Christmas, opened it now instead and it was just a huge disappointment - rather bland and not at all like the one I've had previously. Hope your naughty treats are much better.

Hi snowy. Thank you for the welcome. I'm so glad I've found the village here, it seems fab.

cream - well done, that's brilliant going over a week!! :)

MySpideySenseTickles · 20/12/2014 19:24

I have crusty bread and a whole Boursin cheese, there's even a flake in the fridge, my psychiatrist would be ecstatic, ive been severely dieting for a while and even though I'm still fat and ive lost three stone they keep moaning that they're worried about my eating.
Apparently one Apple and one yellow pepper is not a meal...most meals
I don't want to SH I'm trying hard not to, I'm terrified that ds will see my injuries.

FaithLoveandGrace · 20/12/2014 19:30

spidey your treats sound great :) I agree with your psychiatrist that an apple and a pepper is not a meal, but it is better than nothing if it is all you can manage. Well done for holding on this long. I'm feeling slightly more positive having posted and read a daily reflection. Hope you feel a little more positive this evening.

MySpideySenseTickles · 20/12/2014 19:40

I appear to have eaten all the cheese, my ibs won't be pleased but it was yummy. I'm going back to the diet tomorrow though, I'm too worried about gaining weight back,