Bollockybollockybollocky HTT

[EnpoTree]

Basically I have to take bloody diazepam three times a day and be visited by HTT every day and even then the nurse reckons it's 50/50 if I'll need to go into hospital or not. This has gone too far. I'm absobloodylutely sodding fine and visited the drop-in as I was worried I was going to become not-fine and wanted to know how to stop DP worrying unnecessarily after having spoken to CMHT as I was referred from GP as I wanted to avoid becoming depressed and how to maintain my current good humour and general sparkling and effervescent nature. The lesson apparently being that being responsible and proactive with your mental health gets you accused of poor insight and told to take drugs on pain of hospital admission.

She's really fucking scared me. I will not go into hospital. So to avoid it I have to swallow pills that make me slow and stupid and sleepy even though I am totally happy with the way I am now and it's everyone else who doesn't like it. Maybe its everyone else who needs bloody medicating.

I hate this so much. I know its a bad idea to get involved in MH services. So why do I ever go back?

You're not looking for a new DP by any chance are you?

Oops, sorry, being inappropriate again.

No leftovers for me, everybody had second helpings. I was so pleased!

I've had a nicotine lozenge and a cup of coffee so far today but back on the eating wagon tomorrow

In short I would eat it cold wih salad and bread and stuff. What other leftovers have you got?

Sounds like a glorious success, Mitch.

So far today I've eaten a plate of yoghurt (no bowls clean), and two spoonfuls of peanut butter

I think cold with horseradish, pickles and salad sounds excellent. I think a frothy bottle of ale would go well with it and it might chase away the dregs of my hangover.

All I've had today's is two slices of toast with peanut butter and banana. I'm starting to make myself hungry.

I'm out of bed and showered. This is, I think, excellent progress.

Rah

Well done!

I went back to bed

Going for what I'm going to call a "run".

this is the one day of the week where I never ever run

(apart from next Sunday, there's a race)

but I have achieved: dishwasher, taking rubbish out, tax and insurance for car, riding one horse, kissing the others, finding my purse, thinking about supper

Impressive stuff mitchy. I got as far as doing the ironing in a fairly slapdash fashion.

I'm worried I might also be achieving another soleus strain and I bet it's from dancing not running the same early niggles I ignored last year

annoying

on plus side am on very cusp of achieving Ordering Indian Takeout so at least daughter and I will be fed

nothing compares to ironing, hardcore housework and personal grooming in one!

If I could be granted one wish it would be to have a decent Indian in the village. The nearest one doesn't deliver this far out in the sticks. I'm very jealous.

Oh, I don't run. I "run". I'm on week three of an eight week couch to 5k trainer. So no more than five solid minutes at a time. I did keep up with a proper runner on the last five minutes home though and I am getting the runner's high, which I'd never have dreamed possible before. I'm going out three days a week, on the days I'm not in the gym. I'm doing this prescription for exercise thing so it's great, I have regular one to one sessions with a trainer and so does DP, for £29 a month as a couple.

Aw, horses. I always stroke the warty swaybacked ones that come to say hello to me when I walk past the local field. They always come over for me but never for DP

well that sounds like running to me!

£29 a month is fucking insanely good value! apart from my horses and class A drugs and cars and ski lessons and holidays and of course unrestrained amazon sprees with their potential for painful consequences my main expense is fitness, my gym is about £75 a month and so is the hot yoga studio (yoga will have to wait until spring I think :() and then there is the personal trainer who is not even as little as £29 a time, and then running shoes and assorted bits of kit I am actually really poor in real life

running is so convenient though, the stress of having appointments or booking a class and being penalised for missing it is too much for me sometimes sounds like you are starting to really love it, it's incredibly addictive

What is this "ironing"?

In terms of achievement, I put some clothes on some hangers and went out running. Er.

please can someone order the food for me? I'll give you my credit card details

advanced laziness

(I have an idea of using running as my mood stabiliser when physical health is in better order but it might be a way off)

I probably could spend that much if I went to David Lloyd instead of the grotty council gym I get a good rate because I'm NHS subsidised but it's the same as the concessionary rate I would get anyway for being on DLA.

My main expense fitness-wise is bras. I've needed three super pricy panache bras as I keep changing size and I can't exercise without them. And shoes. I have weird feet and my running shoes cost over £100

yeah, it's David Lloyd off-peak plus £140 each month for personal trainer once a week - money grabbing bastards. I hardly even use a gym unless I'm injured but am locked in for three months so will hopefully get something out of it

I only recently crawled back to them because their pool is 1.2m deep and the council gym has a deep end in which I forget how to swim (phobic) and have to be fished out by attendants otherwise I was quite happy there!