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Autumn days in the village with lots of support for all kinds of MH problems - depression, anxiety, OCD, psychosis etc

999 replies

fluffydressinggown · 14/09/2014 22:50

Shiny new thread. xx

OP posts:
fluffydressinggown · 17/09/2014 21:38

Thank you for your advice I am so sorry I am letting you all down.

Keema you are right - PICU/S3 are a load of shit. I am trying to work through stuff. Still lots of signs that are very clear.

I also watch GBBO and the cakes look yummy yum. Now watching Scott and Bailey.

OP posts:
Victrix · 17/09/2014 21:41

I'm watching GBBO now on catch up, ended up having dinner out with DP after my hospital appointment.

GP appointment was OK earlier, being referred for some kind of psychotherapy.

NanaNina · 17/09/2014 21:45

Fluffy hope you read Keema's post - she knows her stuff - she's been there - got the T shirt.......we're all hoping you'll decide to take the meds.

Spidey PLEASE stop the harsh punishments with your little boy. Read the link Keema has posted which I'm sure you'll find helpful (harsh punishments make the biting worse) and Pyrrh's excellent post is spot on. SO really hope you will stop feeling so bad - your little one is 3 FGS - he's little more than a baby. He will grow out of it in time.

One of my DIL's friends had a little girl who used to bite and her mom used to get in a terrible state and I've often helped mop up her tears - the child was about 3. She's 9 now and noooooooo she doesn't bite any more! Think she stopped when she was about 3.5/4. It's NO different from other pre school behaviour, pushing, hitting etc but people just see it as worse because it reminds them of animals.

You have NOT done anything wrong, but I think you really need to ease up on all that punishment. If it is worrying you so much, would it be an idea to take him out of pre-school for a few months? NOT because he bites but because it is obviously stressing you out and your LO will "catch" this stress and he can't be enjoying all the punishments!

LOVED the glow in the dark star chart Pyrrhgena - counting the stars - magic. Positive parenting is the way to go - praising the behaviour you want and ignoring (as much as possible) or distracting from the behaviours you don't want. And absolutely NO biting back. In the link Keema posted it warns against this and makes the point that it teaches children to bite when you are upset!!

I've got the BB-off taped and looking forward to it. I like Martha too - she's so pretty and has such a sweet smile and reminds me soooo much of my gorgeous beautiful grand-daughter (not that I'm biased you understand) and whilst she isn't anywhere near Martha's standard, she makes very good cakes - she learned from her nan! I can't remember anyone else's name either!

Agree about the eclairs collardove - fresh cream and a fudgy choc or coffee icing - bliss. I'm not at all keen on crème pat.....I'm funny about textures and this is one I don't like. I don't think I'd turn down M & S choux buns though! I love cake with a passion - Victoria sponge, chocolate cake, ginger cake with white icing, coffee and walnut cake, lemon drizzle, most kinds of gateau, fruitcake, scones, flapjacks........there's a garden centre near to me and they do cakes to die for - the place is always jammed packed. I do bake a fair bit and am not bad at it - one of my few skills. I usually follow Mary Berry's recipes and they never fail. I also have a very easy recipe for a chocolate crunch tray bake that everyone loves, and is a must for every family gathering. I'll post the recipe if you like. Blime me, jokes yesterday and recipes today, can it get any better!

Ah well I did pick up finally mid afternoon and fell asleep in the sun outside. Letting DH watch his war programmes till 10.00 (he goes to bed then) and I'll watch the Bake-Off but have also taped the doc about the children "sold" to Americans by the Irish Catholic nuns. I was brought up a catholic but am so glad I'm lapsed - what these nuns and priests did is an absolute disgrace.

Wishing everyone a sleepful/peaceful night

NanaNina · 17/09/2014 21:47

Fluffy you are NOT letting us all down - no way! We just want you to get better sooner rather than later. I know you like cookery programmes. Do you do much cooking/baking?

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn · 17/09/2014 22:29

You're not letting anyone down Fluffy. Take care Thanks

fluffydressinggown · 17/09/2014 22:30

I do bits and bobs of baking, I have made a quiche and some scones on the ward. I have tried to attach a picture.

I make cakes at home sometimes but end up eating them and since I have been on WW I have tried not to!!

I just want you to know I have listened to your posts and I am trying my hardest, it is just very hard when nobody believes what you believe in. I feel very alone sometimes :(

Autumn days in the village with lots of support for all kinds of MH problems - depression, anxiety, OCD, psychosis etc
OP posts:
Victrix · 17/09/2014 22:52

Your scones look lovely Smile

Good night x

nethunsreject · 17/09/2014 23:03

Goodnight all. Hope sleep comes! I am finding it stressful tonight re the bloody referendum. Can't nod off!

Victrix · 17/09/2014 23:28

Same here nethuns

Trying to work out what time to go and vote to avoid people Confused

SomethingVicardThisWayComes · 17/09/2014 23:59

im just posting my streams of throught....dont feel you have to respond but i need to just get this down.

ive had nc with my mother for 15 years. 3 years ago she sent me a msg. tonight i have responded to it.
just with my truth.
how i feel.
i keep telling myself that i dont ever have to enter into any dialogue but i needed to say some things.

her husband abused me, for 8 yeasrs almost daily. ive no idea if she will respond and im half hoping she wont.

ive no idea why ive just dont this. i dont want to enter into dialogue or begin any kind of contact.

i just had to say a tiny bit of what is going on in my head. That may be a decision i live to regret.

NanaNina · 18/09/2014 00:24

Oh Vicar I had no idea you suffered so much - no idea at all. I knew you were estranged from your mother but didn't know why. Did something trigger you to reply to your mother tonight or was it just on impulse. Whatever, I hope it has been cathartic to write down some of how you feel and felt in the past......the ball's in your court Vicar as you say you don't have to engage in a dialogue or do anything you don't want to do...........if this is the first contact after so many years and you say you have written about "your truth" there is no knowing what emotions will be aroused in her - guilt, hurt, sadness - I don't know. Is there a chance that she will mask her of her true emotions with anger as many people do this when facing the truth is too painful.

Lovely to see you on the thread again. NNx

SomethingVicardThisWayComes · 18/09/2014 01:37

thank you nana...
im so sorry in that i have probably "gatecrashed" into the thread yet again without reading the last few pages.

the msg she sent me 3 years ago - she said if i wanted to talk about the past she was ok with it....we will see eh....
ive absolutely no idea why ive responded tonight. She has been in my thoughts a bit lately, yet i dont want contact. im happy being no contact - stronger for it. She had a knack of pulling me down no matter what i was trying to achieve. When i announced my second pregnancy which was much wanted she told me i was a "stupid cow" and asked "what have you done that for?" which i think sums up how good her parenting skills were. I was 25. i think i cut contact when i was 28. I tried to remain on good terms but had massive panic attacks after visiting her and her husband - i was so nervous and jumpy and i would not allow him to be in contact with my DS alone and i felt always "on guard" because he would announce that he was taking him to the shops etc which forced me to go too....i got really ill and ended up on a mobile ECG machine as i had heart problems which turned out to panic related.

i dont feel any ill will toward her, i just dont want to go backward. i needed to say a few things. i also want to know who my birth father is - im almost 43 and she has never told me. refused to tell me.
im working up to that one with no real expectation of finding out.
im now nervous of checking fb. she is a bitter old woman, antisocial and with very few social skills or graces so im a bit worried about what i might get back.
it is as likely to be abusive as anything else. in fact im pretty sure that it will be if things dont go her way - and it hasnt.

truth is i accidentally pressed the return button which sent the msg....i thought it would just give me another line....it didnt - it sent.
now im a bag of nerves. stupid stupid stupid.

im going away on a buddist retreat this weekend to learn to meditate. i hope she doesnt reply before i get back. im going to make a point of not checking my phone while away.
im going alone. packing tomorrow. the place is set in 40 acres of grounds - am going to take walking shoes and a good book.

sorry for the self indulgence here folks. i have no idea what im doing.

thornbird123 · 18/09/2014 06:54

But I believe you fluffy! I feel the connection even though I take meds. If you truly believe in something taking meds would not change anything! I feel somehow loved by the aliens. It is like a ring of love, but at the same time inside the ring is the badness.

MySpideySenseTickles · 18/09/2014 10:49

Had my first counselling session, I cried a lot and told the truth as much as I could. She's got to see her supervisor to decide how best to help me but it's all out in the open now and I have the number for the crisis team in case I decide to do my thing silly like drunk half a cup of salt I've told her about my voice too, she thinks it's more of a flashback sort of thing than anything more sinister.

Victrix · 18/09/2014 11:10

Your weekend away sounds like it will be lovely Vicar

LEMmingaround · 18/09/2014 11:36

The retreat sounds lovely vicar. I think it is good you wrote the letter. You have mentioned this before. Remember you are still in control. This is just something you need to do. X

fluffydressinggown · 18/09/2014 12:43

Your retreat sounds lovely vicar very peaceful!

Good afternoon to everyone else. xx

OP posts:
SomethingVicardThisWayComes · 18/09/2014 13:30

Thanks everyone. I'm guessing she will either ignore or respond aggressively. I'm still in bed....I so wish I didn't just want to waste my days off, but bed is my favourite place. I need to get up and get going in a minute, I need to go shopping then pack. I'm a bit nervous as I'm going alone. I've not told anyone about sending the msg to my mother,
fluffy how are you feeling today? have you managed to take the meds? I hope so.
how is everyone else. ?
tell me to get butt out if bed.....

fluffydressinggown · 18/09/2014 13:37

I am ok. Seen a friend, bit tired today but otherwise ok I guess :)

Get out of bed vicar! :)

I am a level 3 today - washed, dressed, make-uped

OP posts:
Pulledapart · 18/09/2014 14:27

Hi all,

Had a quite a busy day so far been out n about Hmm just on my way to pick up DD. Lots of rest planned this evening if DD allows it. Had a good sleep last night thanks to zopiclone Grin

vicar retreats sounds great. Hope u really really enjoy it Thanks & yes get out of bed now and start packing!

fluffy well done for level 3 that's great. Hope u take the meds soon Wink

How is everyone else? Hope the day has been kind to all x

Victrix · 18/09/2014 14:38

Well I voted first thing so now it's all a waiting game...I feel sick.

Weather isn't very nice so no gardening. Time to clean out all the animals Smile

thornbird123 · 18/09/2014 14:42

I am doing fine. Ring of love comforts me.

Spidey: glad to hear you could open up and got crisis number if needed.

SnowyMouse · 18/09/2014 14:51

Well done on level 3, fluffy! Grin I'm a 2 (again).

Enjoy your weekend, vicar Smile

I'm anxious about the benefits form - I emailed to check they'd receive it, and apparently they are waiting for information from my GP to "see whether you will be required to attend for an assessment or whether they can provide advice to the Department for Work and Pensions without the need for you to do so on this occasion." Hmm Sad

The thing is it had the name and address of my old GP, as I sent it off just before I switched.

At least CPN is coming today. I don't know how people who get anxiety regularly cope!

Victrix, I think it's awful that, at the end of the day, 50% of Scotland's population will be disappointed Sad

Glad you got a good sleep, pulled

Glad you're doing fine, thornbird

How is everyone else?

Victrix · 18/09/2014 14:58

It feels like it's been building up for so long...it doesn't feel real!

I hope you hear back soon Snowy

Pulledapart · 18/09/2014 15:02

((( snowy ))) my coping strategy with anxiety is lots of drugs (prescription kind) Grin can you ask them to resend the form to your new G.P to speed up the process? Hope the cpn visit is useful x

Glad your doing fine thorn

spidey very well done for opening up that is the hardest part & glad you have the crisis number - keep that somewhere visible just in case x