summer heat - in the village we'll meet....oh, those summer nights! support for MH issues, depression, anxiety, what ever the issue come visit the village [titled edited by MNHQ]

[SomethingVicardThisWayComes]

well a well a well a oh tell me more tell me more.....

new thread guys....feels funny doing the threads again! but nice....

so. for any newbies....the purpose of the "village" threads is to support anyone with MH issues....depression, anxiety, anything at all, for what ever reason.

there is an open door policy in the village! so pull up a pew and get stuck in....

[Victrix]

Hope your appointment went well Natasha

[NatashaRostova]

Thanks for the thoughts.

Medication increase to maximum dosage. Go back in 4 weeks. I don't think anybody has a clue what to do with me and I just get medication and told to come back later. I'm wondering what the point of going is, what the point of life is.

How is everyone else doing?

[Katkins1]

Hi Natasha, what medication are you on, and how long have you been on it? I'm really struggling today: dd is much harder work than I expected, and I'm so, so tired. Just keeping going is hard work.

[NatashaRostova]

I'm on sertraline, been on it a couple of months this time but I've been on it before. I don't think any of the medication I have been on has ever done anything tbh.

Sorry you are struggling. How are your sleep patterns?

[Katkins1]

I'm on setraline too, 100mg. How much are you going up to? I've been on it a while and have to say whilst I have more energy, my depressive thoughts are very intrusive. Doctor said to give it 4-6 weeks. My sleep is all over the place, to be honest.

[NatashaRostova]

I'm on 200mg now.

I just constantly want to die. It is getting a real effort to not actually go and do something about it. I'm wondering why I'm fighting the urge.

I don't sleep much. It is usually going on for 2am before I drop off and I can't sleep much beyond 4am. No-one seems bothered by this, but I think if I could sleep better I might not feel so low.

[Katkins1]

:( Have you got a CPN or anything?

[NatashaRostova]

No CPN. The crisis team discharged me back to my GP about a month ago. I'm supposed to ring them or see my doctor if I feel I'm slipping, but my doctor didn't seem concerned today. I just feel so tired and sad. I'm 33, I can't face another 50 years of this. I just want to be euthanised.

[Katkins1]

Ring the crisis team, it does sound as though you could do with a little more help.

[Pulledapart]

Sorry ur both struggling :(

In my experience it does take 4-6 weeks for te meds to work. I used to take sertraline about a year ago & it's worth sticking with if it helps to begin with. I think I just became immune to it after a while. Unfortunately it does increase symptoms first before it starts taking effect. I was given sleeping tablets to help me at the time aswell. Is this something u both could try asking for? Zopiclone worked really well for me.

I'm on a few different mess now so they won't let me ass sleeping tablets to the mix but Ive really struggled with sleep the past week. Hoping to overcome it tonight of I can.

I'm just exhausted all the time thanks to no sleep :( today has been an ok day with DD.

[NatashaRostova]

I've been on 100mg for a month, then 150mg and now 200mg. I feel like I just get meds thrown at me and that is it. I don't really know what will help, or believe that anything can tbh.

So tempted to just get in my car, drive away and drown myself.

[Victrix]

I'm so sorry you are feeling so low, Natasha

I found the Samaritans very useful when I was where you are x

[Katkins1]

I was about to say the Samartians, too. 08457 90 90 90, looked it up. Please do call Natasha.

[NatashaRostova]

Thanks, I have emailed them before.

I'm sorry for blathering on about myself.

[Katkins1]

That's what's the thread is for! If you are struggling, then there's support. You can and will get through this, you just need a helping hand right now. I hope that you managed to phone or email and get a little help, things can get worse before they get better, as they say. I'm struggling a fair bit, swollen throat, aching all over, flu like stuff and very, very tired. I had migraine yesterday, and pain in my back today with a cough too.I have tummy upset and feeling sick too, think I've caught a bug. Have had to cancel seeing friend tommorow. Bit upset that it's taking so long to recover, and the depressive thoughts are never too far away,I feel them like a stabbing pain.

[Victrix]

I hope you both feel better today, Natasha and Katkins

I'm taking it easy, still feeling quite weak and shivery. Need to keep telling myself that I'm not at home because I'm well, I'm just not ill enough to still be in hospital. Went on a bit of a cleaning rampage yesterday and exhausted myself.

However I have got an apple cake in the oven (it's quite chilly today) and because it has cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg in it my house smells a bit like Christmas - never thought I'd find that cheering in August!

How is everyone else out there doing?

[NatashaRostova]

I've got a nasty headache and feel really out of it, I think it is from increasing the sertraline from 150 to 200mg.

Take it easy, Victrix, don't push yourself too far.

Hope everyone else is okay.

[Victrix]

Am relaxing with and

[Katkins1]

Hope you feel better, Victrix. I've got something like glanduar fever, and have had a really rubbishy day depression wise. DD has been throwing a big strop over everything and I just feel as though I'm not coping at all.

[Pulledapart]

and is the way to go today for me too. Headache galore but that's due to lack of sleep. I've found some zopiclone in my cupboard today so I'm going to be taking it tonight I don't care what the Dr says anymore I need sleep I'm exhausted!

Hope the evening is good for u all and remember to be kind to yourself. Were all doing the best we can x

[NatashaRostova]

I've managed to finish some of the work I have to do while I'm on holiday. Still feeling out of it and I've self-harmed. Still too terrified to call the crisis team.

Katkins have you seen a doctor about your physical ill health? It can't be helping.

Pulledapart I hope you manage to get some sleep tonight.

[Katkins1]

Natasha, you need to call the crisis team. Have you got any children? Maybe you can call in real life?

[NatashaRostova]

I might call tomorrow. Going to take a break from the thread, seems like I'm monopolising it and not many other people are posting.

Katkins, I saw your other thread, could you try contacting your CPN and explain that you are struggling?

[SomethingVicardThisWayComes]

natasha dont worry about monopolising - honestly its what the threads here for - for when you are struggling and need to share.

please do call your gp tomorrow.

i am really struggling atm. i have just narrowly missed being suspended from work and hauled up on gross misconduct charges.....my crime? i gave someone i had been dealing with an offer of help. i had given them my personal details and told them to get in touch and i would help them sort some stuff out that they were struggling with. i was sent home. ive also been told by supervision that no one likes me, and thats why.

i almost didnt get home because i was crying the whole way home and i didnt see a HGV behind me on the motorway, i pulled right in front of it. he had to beep his horn and all i could think was i wish id hit it so i didnt have to go back and face being a laughing stock and the most hated person on my team.

tomorrow i have 9 jobs to apply for. ive got a week to find another job.

[chocogirl77]

I've just spent £70 on toys for the kids that I can't afford as felt guilty about my suicide attempt last year, with all the robin Williams stuff.

The kids are happy with the toys, my DH hasn't commented as he gets that things get rough for me whenever there's a publicised suicide.
I'm still not sure why I'm still alive after taking so much stuff, days like today I veer from feeling like a failure for still being here to feeling guilty for attempting suicide at all.

Does anyone else get like this after a suicide in the news or am I just even stranger than I thought?