roll up for the village fete! move to our village if your 'fete' is to be happy!

[ThatVikRinA22]

6th thread folks....

keep talking/posting.

[ColouringInQueen]

Afternoon all. Nice here 24 and sunny spells & breeze - perfect. Camp thing over - went v well so glad I could help a bit.

to dh still in bed with hangover despite promising to start building treehouse c with and for kids this morning. He went to the pub with some dad friends. .. Not impressed. Off camping tomorrow so I am having a busy day! Dcs playing nicely tho which is lovely.

hoochy glad you managed to enjoy bits of soul survivor. Retreating to rent sounds v wise.

Well done Ed on getting loads done - am partic jealous re uniforms. Them and dentist are not scheduled into already jammed diary.

Take care all

[mamakoukla]

How are you doing Snowy?

I am having a good day - I went to my first exercise class in years and walked there and back. The sun was out, a cool breeze and it was lovely to walk along feeling the sun and cool air on my skin. One of the little things that make me happy.

A few not so pleasant tasks to do so I will get cracking and then distract myself with nice tasks. At least that's the plan....

Camping CIQ! I am jealous (in a good way). Might try to convince DH that it is a great family activity. I have been with friends but never as a family.

[SnowyMouse]

I'm not sure about the art therapy, I'm not sure about the waiting list for it, a bit of a waiting game.

My psychiatrist is wondering if there are physical changes that cause my MH issues, it's a bit unnerving.

How's everyone doinfg?

[ColouringInQueen]

Hi snowy good but knackered here. Did your psych go into any more detail can well imagine that's unnerving.

Hi mama nice pic of you walking in the sun kids v excited about camping - their first time. Have borrowed a friends tent and it is ginormous! Hope you got everything done that you wanted.

Well dh finally got up at 2.30. Asked for forgiveness at 5 when I asked for an apology. "Oh but I didn't drink more than anyone else" no but you are well aware that you have a lower tolerance than most guys... anyhow done.

Need to pack, clear up bombsite of lounge, put tent away after trial assembly, wash up piles of washing up and then hang out the washing! Phew.

Hi to all.

[ThatVikRinA22]

Good night all.

DS has upset me - cant really go into it now. DD is at a party so im waiting up.
bored.

[EdwiniasRevenge]

Had a long day out at the shops today. Didn't buy anything.

But I have a new (and slightly obscure. ..taps nose) craft challenge whichwill see me bbounce out of bed tomorrow.

Hugs to all. Here if you need to offliad vicar, by pm if more appropriate.

I'm shattered but have spent a few hours gathering images ready for my craft session tomorrow. Will either turn out stunning....or a horrific mess...sewing machine at the ready though.....

[mamakoukla]

Snowy, that sounds quite complicated but also interesting. In terms of the art therapy, I'd go with an open mind and just potter along. Many years ago I received hypnosis treatment; I was extremely skeptical but thought what do I have to lose by trying? Similarly, counseling - it's been a year now. Just try.

Hugs to all and especially Vicar. Ed I am always intrigued by your crafts; haven't forgotten your pink flamingos when you went away and your crocheting.

CIQ - it helps that he realized and it sounds as though you are properly prepared. I didn't get everything done BUT I did book a hairdresser appointment! It has taken over a year to pluck up the courage, especially as I was going through some very dark moments and times. Excited as I very much need a good haircut :)

[mamakoukla]

Snowy, as it turned out both were helpful for me at the time. You never know. Be open to opportunity.

[LEMisdisappointed]

Guys - im scared :( I think i might be an alcoholic :( :( how the fuck did that happen? shit shit shit I feel so ill, i got so drunk yesterday that i have had the hangover from hell, i mean, i drank - four cans of beer, a bottle of wine and jack daniels and coke FFS, im surprised i didn't die Made an arse of myself in front of friends. I feel like death, really bad and had vowed never to touch another drop, but when DP poured himself a beer, i really wanted it. What the fuck do i do?

[TheSilverySoothsayer]

Don't panic, LEM. How many JD & cokes?

How often do you drink day to day?

Do you often have hangovers and what are they like? Do you drink more water than you would have thought humanly possible before going to bed drunk?

[EdwiniasRevenge]

LEM that does not make you an alcoholic.

You got drunk on one day. We are all allowed to do that from time to time. (My neighbour and I drank 3 bottles of wine between us. I don't think I'm an alcoholic.

My dad was an alcoholic.

He would drink a 2 litre bottle of beer/cider ever 2-3 days.
He would drink a whole bottle of whiskey a weekend.
On top of that he would go to the pub 3-4 times a week. Twice on a sunday.
Day in. Day out. Week in week out.
For years He would have a cup of coffee when he got up. He would drink NOTHING else but alcohol all day.
He would 'sneak' mums christmas spirits and then when she went to have a drop in spring/summer there would be a cm left in the bottle. Being a 15/16yo I would get the blame...
He kept a 2litre bottle of beer/cider by his bed.
Before he got his licence revoked he kept the same in his car.
In the same way I struggle to function to do day to dau tasks w/o ADs. He needed alcohol to function.
He needed alcohol. To the extent he would drink tesco value beer and spirits just because it was alcohol.

So.

Are you drinking EVERY day?
Are you regularly getting drunk alone (IMO getting drunk occassionally and/or socially does not mean you are an alcoholic).
Do you need alcohol to get you through the day/function?

I think we could all do with cutting down. But tgat doesn't mean we are alcoholics.

My day has been ok. Craft project going well. Totally out of my scope of experience but really enjoying it. It is a totally bespoke comissioned piece (cryptic). Will hopefully finish tomorrow. Forced myself to do some housework first which was good as I totally absorbed myself in it once I started.

Hugs to all. Especially vicar. Hope the flat clearing hasn't been too stressful and hope it hasn't thrown up any more surprises.

[TheSilverySoothsayer]

Someone I know is a recovering alcoholic. He used to drink every day usually to excess. He got into fights. His drinking was nothing like you describe about yourself. He would have gone for 'the hair of the dog', not resisted it. (I think you imply you resisted?)

I used to put it away like nobody's business in my 20's and 30's - fending off hangovers with the above trick with the water, and drinking different things in the same session. Then I went onto wine, mostly, till I noticed it was bringing out a nasty side of me as I got older. Now it's the very occasional lager.

[ThatVikRinA22]

evening all

lem - my dh told me the other day he thinks i have a problem with alcohol - i dont drink to excess but i do drink too much and drink daily. Im trying to take stock, and be much more mindful of what im drinking. a blow out every now and then isnt that bad - but Dh told me i am deluding myself as to how much i drink.

im weary tonight - more DS related nonsense but i wont bore you....im venting on chat anyway. He is such hard hard work and i feel guilty for thinking that - its easier when he is not under my feet and constantly in my thoughts. flat clearing sorted - but im sad that he gave up his uni course so near to the end. Im sat here waiting for his washing to dry so he has clothes to take back tomorrow with him down south. Im cross that he didnt come out for the meal i had booked tonight because he has partied for 3 days and was too hungover. I feel like telling him to book a bloody hotel next time he comes home.
i have my medical tests coming up and then my lovely spa break with dd.....im very much looking forward to a complete break for 2 days. i need to just not be thinking for those days, just enjoying rest and relaxation and some spa treatments.....roll on.

[ThatVikRinA22]

oh and i have 3 more ratty rescues.....i now have 9 ratty rodents. sounds mad but everyday i take them up to the bathroom to roam free - it forces me to either unwind in a bath or read for an hour.....they are good for my health. i take the 6 girls up and then the 3 boys.....i know i appear off my rocker but they are good for my soul.....

[TheSilverySoothsayer]

Nine rats

In our later wine phase at first we used to tuck into 3 litre wine boxes over a weekend. Then Ex ordered mixed cases from Laithwaites, and he and I would drink a bottle each a night. To the horror of DD, then in early teens, who berated us. But we thought we weren't being excessive.

[ThatVikRinA22]

i adore my boy rodents.....
ive just had Dudley out for cuddles and then Barney - Barney is fat and lazy and just loves a cuddle - he just lays with his eyes half closed while i rub his head and ears....then gives me an appreciative lick on the lips. he is just a little fat bundle of gorgeousness.
the girls have been out for rat runs around the bathroom - but they are skittish and while funny dont do cuddles like the boys do....

im just about to get my other boy who has been left out a bit tonight....i just love my lazy big fat docile cuddly boyos....

i think i may be a rat addict. i am reading books again because of them - because while they free range i need something to do!

i sat waiting for clothes come out of the drier for DS....

[LEMisdisappointed]

Thanks guys - maybe alcoholic is a bit extreme but i definately have a problem with drink, i probably drink 3-5 bottles of wine a week, or the equivalent in beer. Like you, Vicar, my DP has expressed his concern. I let my indulgence ruin our weekend and im very cross with myself - my back and sides hurt so my liver and kidneys were clearly not happy with me! Silvery, it was just the one JD and coke, i can so pretty week, but still,a whole bottle of pink wine and four cans of beer? It has to stop, i associate wine with being relaxed and i look at other people sipping wine and looking all relaxed and happy an think it will make me feel the same. I am struggling alot with my self esteem lately and have a thread in relationships where i spoke about my inability to make close friends and i got hammered on it :( Accused of being gay (which i don't really care about, i wouldn't rule it out but never met a woman i fancied if that makes sense) but in time old mn fashion, once one poster had decided i was a closet lesbian everyone jumped on it. Thats why i only tend to share here now - not because you will tell me what i want to hear but that we appreciate each others backgrounds and are a bit more sensitive to the small stuff.

Am definately intrigued re your craft challeng Ed! Will there be a reveal??


Ciq - you must be as frustrated with your DH as my DP was with me, and i STILL feel like shit. I am going to try to go cold turkey on the booze actually - we are shopping in a bit and i will pick myself some nice grown up fizzy, NON alcoholic treats to sip in the sunshine. To be fair, i don't tend to do the blow out drinking and am so cross with myself but its done now and my DD thought it was hysterical! Especially when i decided i needed a piddle so stripped down to bra and pants and jumped in the sea in the middle of a firework display I blame the heat really

[hoochymama1]

Ooh, I don't know it's really hard to be objective about your drinking. My mum was an alcoholic Ed. It was horrible, as you know. We could never have friends round

Found an AA questionnaire, might be helpful

www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=71

Anyway, I've felt really down over the last couple of days. It all seems so pointless.

So, tomorrow I am,

Swimming
Meeting a friend for coffee
Going to the library to get new books.

I shall tell you tomorrow if I manage to do this stuff, or just slump on the sofa as usual

[SnowyMouse]

Big hugs vicar, and to all.

[LEMisdisappointed]

Thanks for the link hoochy - i hope you enjoy the swim! I love swimming in the sea i think i may take DD tomorrow, can't bear swimming pools though - i get claustrophobic and sweaty in the changing room. Managed to get out and about today - saw some friends id not seen for too long and it was nice. Feeling a little more human - my liver still hates me though :)

[Notsoblonde]

Creeps back into thread slowly.

Hi all lem and vicar sorry your feeling like this, but it's so easy to fall into the way of, sit down, glass of wine and unwind. I relate wine to relaxing too, I used to get kids off to bed then straight to fridge and pour myself a lovely cold glass of wine, then another one, then maybe another one. Did this most nights for a while, last few years though I only did it from thurs night to sat, but since starting the sertraline I have made a concerted effort not to drink, I have maybe had 3 glasses of wine in 7 weeks.

snowy well done on being discharged

hoochy did you go swimming?

I have had a bit of a rubbish week, thought I was doing so well, then a cat dug its claws into me, you honestly barely see it, but I have gotten myself in such a tizz, thinking I may have tetanus :( I went to see my practice nurse the next day who gave me a tetanus booster as mine was 5 years overdue (have had loads in my yoof) just to update it but my anxiety has reared it's ugly head again. I even phoned my gp the other night saying I felt my jaw was stiff, she said she really wasnt concerned about tetanus but am still worried.

[ThatVikRinA22]

evening everyone
hoochy hope you managed your swim.
notso anxiety is horrible - rationality doesnt seem to enter into it does it....hope you are feeling a bit better tonight.

lem i think im going to buy some fancy nice soft drinks - shloer or similar and try to not buy wine.

i didnt feel like id overdone it today but in reality i have - i had 2 white wine spritzers at dinner as i went with DD to the local as DH had taken DS back down to devon - then DD wanted to try pimms so i bought a pitcher of pimms and lemonade - she didnt like it so i ended up drinking it.

and ive had a glass of red tonight. added up thats really not good....

DS has gone back down south, he really winds me up when he is here but i miss and worry about him when he isnt. i stayed up the whole night washing and drying his clothes (he had left most of what he owned at uni so it all came home with us yesterday - all needed washing) i went to bed at 8 this morning when they left - poor DH has driven for over 9 hours....i worry so it was probably good that i slept through a lot of it....

am going to attempt to get ot bed in a min - realised i havent taken my meds for a couple of days so will do that now.

[EdwiniasRevenge]

vicar I love you.

You just made me realise I missed my bedtime meds.

I really can't miss a dose of my new ones. Supposed to be really bad news and I don't fancy trying it.

Anyway I took tonights and realised I missed this mornings (packet is labelled with days - good job cos I need it)...oops...may explain my shakiness today.

Still working on craft project...I'm a bit of a perfectionist but I think I am getting there....

[TheSilverySoothsayer]

Hello all, been busy with a writing project, but following you all, and still doing well. May have let the house slip a little though .

[hoochymama1]

Nope, didn't swim, but went to Library and coffee with friends Such a struggle at the moment, but going to London with dh on Wednesday for two nights dh presently in bed with an MS relapse. I am not optimistic about the trip as use of legs is generally needed around town.

Good reminders about meds, I'm getting complacent too

I just want to go back to bed and hibernate...

Tomorrow, big food shop and swim maybe

Much love to all fellow fete people .The rain has only got bad since we invented the fete thing. Coincidence? I think not


Have a happy and peaceful evening.