that light at the end of the tunnel isnt a train....stay on track!

[ThatVikRinA22]

thought we had better have a new one - old one nearly full. Think this is our 4th thread now....

linky to old one here

so, here we go....title a little more optimistic than i feel but im sure i will get back on track soon.....not doing bad particularly, just feeling a bit consumed with things....work is so intense. id forgotten.

anyway....nuff of me. over to you guys....
hope everyone manages to find us to say "hi"....welcome old and new.

Doing small things is thought to make doing more easier, I think it works a bit. An incentive scheme sounds a good plan.

I don't really want to see CPN, but I know I get those feelings when I'm low.

::Zombie takes a very deep breath::

Hello everyone. May I join you please?

Some of you may know a bit of my back story but I won't repeat that here now. Suffice it to say that I have been struggling for a very long time. I finally went to see my GP about it a couple of weeks ago. He prescribed Sertraline for me and has also referred me to the CMHT. I have been seeing a counsellor privately since January but he thinks I need additional support. He's probably right.

I guess the main reason I'm coming here now is that I'm about to start taking the Sertraline. Having read about the possible side effects I didn't start that immediately as I was away in Kos on my own last week and I didn't want to risk having to deal with those when I was so isolated. But if I'm to start trying to climb out of the abyss I've inhabited for many years, today has to be the day.

Will you help me through this?

zombie absolutely, if I wasn't so much as a wimp I would be joining you but I want to wait till dh is home before I start the sertraline, this is a very supportive thread.

I will!! We all will - gets brave and hugs a zombie! um, The Zombie!

I don't take sertraline, i take citalopram which is similar. There are a few ladies on here who have just started taking sertraline though. I think it is quite a popular "choice" of late.

How are things with you physically, did you have treatment?

This thread is a godsend - so so supportive, we can come here for handholding wiht the big stuff and just whinge about the small stuff, indeed sometimes the small stuff is what is the most difficult to cope with.

It is also something that helps me because it helps me to say, you know what, im having a bad day today, so im just not going to push myself.

Today i have been knitting and playing candy crush. Tomorrow - the sun will be out. I think if you read through, there are little improvements (and set backs) every day for a lot of us here.

Hi Zombie, of course you can join us, and you can do it with the sertraline. I take tricyclics and antipsychotics.

I agree, this thread is a godsend

I've mostly been eating today, oops

Thank you, Notso and LEM.

Physically I'm a bit of a wreck. I was diagnosed with breast cancer 19 months ago. I had a mastectomy, 6 cycles of chemo, 3 weeks of radiotherapy and am now approaching the end of a year on Herceptin. I also had a severely abnormal smear result a couple of months ago so last month needed to have a LLETZ treatment and I'm still waiting for the biopsy results from that. All the BC treatment has left me still a bit debilitated.

I'm just having some lunch and will then take one of these new pills.

Hi zombie welcome. I'm not on sertraline myself but the are a couple of others on here who are. My understanding is that side effects can last a couple of weeks but it does seem to be pretty effective.

We'll all be here for you - as others have said it's a wonderfully supportive thread. Wishing you all the very best x

zombie well done that is a lot to go through, enjoy your lunch :)

Morning. Hi 5s zombie (you are best keeping your distance from me as I have a lurgy you definitely don't want).

Everyone here is lovely.

Hi5s lem for getting the knitting needles out! I would love to crush some candy but waiting for an update unless I get the laptop out.

Must do some baby jobs.y house is a tip.

Gonna text brown owl and tell her I'm not going to brownies tonight. ..won't go down well...

Hi Snowy, ColouringIn and Edwinia.

OK. I've done it. I've cut one of the pills in half and taken it. You'd think they'd score pills that might need to be taken half at a time to make them easier to break.

Now I need to go down to the laundry and fetch out the holiday washing and get it on the line.

I remember your thread about the LLETZ treatment zombie, i have had that too - unpleasnt, but ive had worse. I didnt know about the BC, i'm sorry. You have had so much to cope with, you are allowed to take some time to recover, in your head.

Did your doctor tell you to take half a tablet? The only reason i ask is because if i tablet isn't scored, it isn't really meant to be split in two and the actual active ingredient may not be evenly distributed across the tablets.

Yes, LEM. For the first week I'm supposed to take half a tablet and then start taking a whole one.

In many ways, my health issues are the easiest to deal with. There's just been one crisis after another for the last 2 years. None of those are the root causes of my depression as it predates them by a long time. But they have meant that I'm finally at breaking point.

breaking point can often be turn around point though - time to take control and make things better. You have a lovely smile, so hopefully you will be able to use it more - summer is coming (please god) and am hoping that will make alot of us feel brighter.

Hello Zombie and welcome!

I've been on Sertraline now for 5 weeks, on 100mg but started too with cutting a tablet in half as per GP's instructions.

Hope you get on OK, we're here for you

Hi everyone and welcome Zombie. Pull up a chair and have a . Lovely people here to offload to .

You have had such a relentless cancer journey Zombie . No wonder your emotions and body are battered and bruised. But not your spirit [yes zombies do have spirits in my world ]
I hope your healing began on your visit to Kos . Some warmth and tasty food to start your recovery . A rest,a read and thinking time xx

Re starting up meds I empathise . My GP sighs and says to me every time "do not read the side effects and think you are going to automatically have them all PLEASE " .

We will handhold while you adjust . Lots here are on Sert . I am on tricyclics ........a maintenance dose for now.

LEM hope you are feeling better as the day goes on. Are you knitting your DDs dress ? I am intrigued re the tarantula pet . A pet store nearby had an owner in and I was surprised how gentle and bonny they were .

CIQ Incentives are a must . Forgot to say how helpful your posts on motivation were for me . Echoed with me a lot . Small steps for this damn illness and it is frustrating ...so frustrating to need to get back on track and not be able to . Guess this where keeping a diary is so useful . Smilies are a good idea so going to do that here .
Do be kind to yourself CIQ xx

ED I loved your owl brooch forgot to say. Wish I was next door and could creep in and make you a lemsip and do the girls tea [not in nosy way ]. Brown Owl will maybe realise what a diamond she has in your unstinting work if you are not there and ill . Stay in your bed and crochet and snooze. The girls have had a lovely time at the weekend.

Snowy Good luck with Cpn tomorrow . x

Notsoblonde a fellow nurse. I dont work now ....too much of a dinosaur but sure have empathy in bucket loads for you working while feeling so low . Take your tablet tonight when Dh is home lovely.....and join Zombie on the path to recovery .
If you need some sick leave say for two weeks while the meds settle down take it . Work will manage. You need a rest.

Hi to Hoochie and our Vicar .........Catmint and NanaNina is back tomorrow after her visit to her family .

UA can only imagine how tired and emotional you must feel today
I hope that your father had a funeral that said all you wanted to say for him and you got some solace and comfort ........the goodbye he would have wanted . So sorry x
Be gentle with yourself wont you ?

Forgot to send these to UA . .
They are tulips,late narcissus and native bluebells with lily of the valley for scent .

Hi Hoochy and Basset.

Thank you all for your welcome and kind words.

Can anyone tell me how quickly side effects begin to manifest? If they're going to do so at all of course. [optimistic]

evening everyone. im just about out of the head fug that is working nights....

i MUST do a schedule to submit for part time working - think i will do it at home and take it in just to type up.

Welcome zombie - im on sertraline too.
the side effects arent very nice to begin with, but they really do wear off - you may be lucky and not get them.

i started on 50mg for about 6 weeks then went up to a 100mg which my gp says is full treatment dose for most people.
i didnt feel very well on it to start with but within 5 weeks the side effects had gone, and i didnt suffer again with them when the dose was upped.

im trying to decide if i have a cold or hay fever.....i have a very snotty nose....i think it could be hay fever but its getting on my wick.

i laid in too late today (normally when coming off last night shift i try to just grab a couple of hours and then get up) i failed miserably at that today.

i look like cat weazel and am still in my pjs.
i have tidied up, cleaned out the jewel ratty girls and have cooked a proper dinner for myself (a 5 min wonder of salmon and cous cous) but still healthy.

im about to go and have a soak in the bath with the ratty girls running free for a bit.

ive got my hair cut and colour tomorrow. (roots!! eek! im not looking!)

UA
i just typed a huge post to you and then bloody lost it pressing something.
i was just trying to say how sorry i was about your dad, and that you may be in the eye of the storm which means things can get a bit rough again. be very gentle on yourself and dont expect too much too soon.
we are all here if you need us.

waves to everyone else

Hi Zombie, the first time I took them 3 years ago I didn't notice any side effects at all.

This time is worse, sicky fuzzy feelings, tired and go to bed early GP says that this often happens when you take it a second time.

But, I haven't missed any placement , also it's been better lately and I have had a couple of nice late evenings socialising

Lost half a stone too!Putting it back on now

I take them with breakfast about 7ish.

Like Basset says, though, take the time off. It's worth it to give you a little rest, work will always be there. Taking them is sooo much better than depression

Also, as lovely people on here have found, if they don't work, or side effects are horrid, you can try different ones.

zombie x posts

for me the side effects were immediate. I felt whoozy, drunk, light headed, sick,
it really put me off taking them to start with.

i found taking them with food in the evening was best for me so i could just slump or sleep if i needed.

i also had a loss of appetite, and a weird jittery jaw thing. I also had the most vivid odd dreams.

ive been on 100mg since december now and i get no side effects at all now.
hth! x

oh god i forgot the fatigue!

i thought i would never get out of bed again.....

i would stick with them for at least 8 weeks before you consider changing to something else - now the effects have worn off for me i am much much better on them.

i was off work for 5 months.
i hadnt realised how poorly i had become. This is our 4th thread zombie and i always link back to the last thread on the first post - if you work backwards you can see how crappy i was feeling and i gave a blow by blow account on the meds riveting im sure!!

but if you want to flash through you can see how far ive come. the meds have been a godsend.

[Flowers] ua I hope today went as well as it could and you're able to rest tonight.

zombie my side effects started day 2 of fluox, but everyone's different, fingers crossed for you.

Thanks for your kind words Basset and those flowers for ua were lovely. I'm a bit to say I am struggling a bit tonight. Morning at home was fine. Had lunch then went to run some errands in town and anxiety built up, esp in hairdresser when I found out my usual hairdresser had left - I've had another cut it so it's not a disaster but then trying to find times for me and dd was tricky. By the time I got to school was feeling pretty tense. Managed not to set oven correctly so had to improvise with dinner, and now just feel like I want to scream.

I am doing more the last week or so - maybe a bit too much? But it's better than doing little and feeling like a waste of space! The negative thought stuff is feeling mountainous tonight too...

Time for chocolate cake I think

Take care all x

Oops cross share

((( Zombie ))) you've been through so much..

Notso stay home if you are not well and look after yourself, take the med, it's ok.

Vicar enjoy the jewel ratty girls, and have a good time at the hairdressers, it does make you feel better

In counselling today, I was told a story about Nevermind and how he tried not to mind when things went wrong or people were mean to him. But over time, he was changed by this and got worse and being around him was unpleasant. Then he found someone supoortive to talk to about the things that made him feel sad or angry or fearful. At first he cried rivers of tears and his anger lit fires but, over time, it became easier to say he was unhappy and why.