to throw up after dinner to save on calories?

[wildswans]

I am not bulimic, I weigh around 10 stone which for my height of 5' 2" is slightly tubby, but i am ok with that. However, I quite often deliberately make myself sick after a rich meal just to get rid of the calories. I consider it a 'win, win' situation - I have a lovely meal but don't need to worry about the effects on the waist line. I have just been out to a lovely Thai meal with my DH and DC and the contents have been flushed away!

AIBU or do lots of you actually do the same?

No, not everyone does this. There also isn't a large, but silent majority who purge after eating a heavy meal.

If you believe its true then you are kidding yourself. You are also in denial that you have a problem, as if even after being told its not normal and its a sign of an eating disorder, you're not prepared to listen.

Purging after eating a high calorie meal is not normal. If you are so in control, stop doing it. You are harming yourself by doing it and you are kidding yourself if you don't think what you're doing is harmful.

I realise I've come over as very haughty in my posts on this thread, for which I'd like to apologise to the OP.

I agree with the posters who recognise, with hindsight, this is something that happened during a time in their lives they feel out of control and unhappy.

Anonymumous Bulimia releases endorphins, you get a rush from it. Bizarre as it may sound most self destructive activities do (self harm, anorexia, etc)

I don't know what you want from us, OP, I really don't.

The people on this thread who have something in common with you - in that they have made themselves vomit on numerous occasions - are people who have or have had eating disorders. ALL of us were 'in control' at some point. All of us felt that we had discovered marvellous new ways of controlling our weight. All of us felt that the outside world had no idea and that we knew best. Yet, strangely, most of us kept it secret. Most of us suffered electrolyte imbalances, swollen glands, burst blood vessels all over our faces, scabby knuckles, rough skin, eroded enamel. We put our hearts and other vital organs under terrible strain. Some of us got so ill we spent time in hospital, getting to know other patients who didn't make it out alive.

I've had anorexia (mostly) and bulimia, and have to tell you that though other people got most worried about the anorexia, the bulimia was far tougher on my body and mind.

So: that's our experience, but you want us to applaud you and tell you how clever you are. Well, maybe you are; maybe you've found a way of having risk-free bulimia. But perhaps, rather than berating us for not being sensitive enough to you, you could be sensitive enough to us to understand why we find it hard to cheer you on in the way you seem to want?

Btw, I'd be staggered if your dd doesn't know you're bulimic. But good luck to you, and to her.

Eurostar you are right - but the thresholds are not arbitrary.
Anorexia and bulimia are (obviously) very very complex disorders.

There are a lot of behaviours, and symptoms, which encroach onto ED territory without actually coming anywhere close to the illnesses which are B & A.
While increased media coverage in the last 20 years has helped in many ways, it has caused this over-diagnosis which really stretches mental health services.
Seriously - however unpalateable it is to some posters - there are people who make unusual choices (which might bear a resemblance to one or two aspects of a serious mental illness) but who are actually healthy people who are choosing to do one unusual/unhealthy thing.
Like smoke, maybe.

Or consume a lot of unhealthy food (and not vomit it).

To insist that the OP is ill is judgemental and ignorant.
It is possible to disagree with someone's choices without labelling them as ill/ in need of help.

Well said Devora

Your DH and DC know. Sick smells. It makes the whole house smell for a while. That fact, combined with you spending longer than usual in the bathroom after a large meal, will tell them everything.

I'm sure they worry about you, and your DD will copy you.

Sorry, but how does vomiting after eating, thinking (I say thinking, as it isn't true) you have brought back all the calories, damaging your health yet being completely deluded about it all and having such an unhealthy relationship with food, makes you not ill? It does. It means you have an Eating Disorder. The OP may not have full blown Bulimia....YET. But, she is on her way and if she thinks she is in control, then she is very much deluded. The illness is in control, and can get much worse resulting in having a much stronger grip of the OP.

Being all soft and saying "There there, all will be ok. You aren't ill, you are in control! It is perfectly normal to an unhealthy thing." will not help her one iota.

Actually MentallyWell having one of two things in common with an eating disorder is an eating disorder. It may not be anorexia or bulimia, but it will be ED-NOS

That might be so Mentallywell but would it be ethical to not inform a smoker of the risk to his/her health? I am certainly not saying Op has an eating disorder but it is not a common thing to do after a meal and the fact that she is trying to convince herself it is, makes me wonder whether she has some distorted thoughts and if that's the case is she really able to make the informed decisions you speak of.

Being all soft and saying "There there, all will be ok. You aren't ill, you are in control! It is perfectly normal to an unhealthy thing." will not help her one iota.

I don't think anyone has said that?

Sweetheart. You're ill. Please get help.

Why is it important whether lots of other people do this? Step back a minute. Is "it's normal" relevant from a health point of view. Smoking is normal. Still addictive. Still bad for you.

Some teenagers think tombstoning is normal. Some of them die.

It's not important whether other women have eating disorders right now. The problem is that you are developing one. Please get help.

Has your daughter ever said, "but everyone else is doing it!"? Did you ever reply, "would you jump off a cliff if everyone else was doing it?" Don't develop bulimia, just because you think everyone else is.

Wildswans you are bulimic.
You are not in control.
The bulimia is what makes you feel this way.
You are ill, please seek help.

I can't comment knowledgably on eating disorders.

I will admit that on occasion (once or twice a year max) if I have overeaten to the point where I am lying in bed at night feeling a bit nauseous, I have made the choice not to 'fight it' and kind of let myself be sick iykwim? And afterwards there is a certain satisfaction that although I have indulged, those calories are not going in. I have never planned to do this or done it when I feel a bit full but not unwell. As a rule my diet and weight are pretty healthy and steady. I wouldn't see myself as having an eating disorder.

Also, many people make lighthearted comments when they have stomach upsets that 'at least they will lose a few pounds'.

Is this the sort of thing you are getting at OP? You do come across as seeing 'purging' as a positive thing in your life, which sounds worrying. I hope you can make peace with your eating habits.

I am not ill. My DD does not know I am sure and no, i would not encourage her to follow my example. I am not saying it is something that I recommend.

I am not being flippant, but how do you think the ancient Romans coped with all those multi course banquets - they purged of course. I just don't see that this is the big deal that most of you are making it out to be. i am sure many will agree but inevitably they are not the ones posting - the silent majority versus the strident minority.

happyhopefulmummy, no, no one sane enough has. But MentallyWell is trying to make out like it is ok by bringing other things into it.

The fact is, those other things also cause health problems, and people who do, say smoke, do have those health problems shoved in their faces at every opportunity and they know and accept those. The OP doesn't know and accept. She is in denial, so doing as I said earlier, won't help her. That was my point.

OP- There was no point in posting then - you still believe it happens a lot and are ignoring anything said otherwise.

Does that mean we should go back to how things used to be then OP? Hanging? Just because it used to be done way back when?

We know more now than they did back then. We know the damages of what it does to your body. I say we, but I honestly don't think you do.

Do yourself a favour, and do a search on the damages making yourself sick can cause.

Mentally Well is one of the few posters here to show any insight or common sense. What do the rest of you do? eat your 5 a day, don't smoke, no more than 14 units a week, exfoliate and moisturise, do craft with your kids, never go to McDs, never have an overdraft, don't eat chocolate, buy from the Boden catalogue....

Sorry, we're not all so perfect!

I think the Romans may not have actually had vomitoria. I think it may be a myth. If it isn't, then think about the Romans more fully. They kept slaves. They watched men fight to the death for entertainment. Not necessarily a model for us to follow.

Rubbish wildswans. Stop being so defensive.

Yes Empusa, possibly ED-NOS, but if you have ever studied the DSM-IV you will have found many many non-specified 'disorders' which do not detrimentally affect an otherwise healthy person's life to any great extent.
Being labelled with a condition does not mean you can't live with it.
Many people live contented fulfilled lives while choosing to partake in unusual behaviours. Often these behaviours are what help them to remain well/happy.
Think about it - the risks the OP faces are :
Bad teeth
Osteoporosis
Infertility
Throat cancer
Mouth Cancer
Serious in anyone's book - but there are hundreds of activities which millions of us partake in which put us at risk of these and we don't have to put up with being labelled as 'ill' in regards to our decision making.
No one is saying that vomitting is in any way healthy - but I am suggesting that it is an unhealthy practice which is not necessarily related to serious mental illnesses like Bulimia and Anorexia.

they also used to feed christians to the lions-but that dosnt make it right

Actually, I DO smoke. I do sometimes drink more than 14 units a week. I don't exfoliate and moisturise, I do go to Mc Donalds when I am in town and near one, I have had an overdraft, and I don't buy from Boden.

Seriously, It is one thing doing something and accepting what it does to you, and then doing something, and being completely deluded about it and not having an idea about the damage you are causing yourself. If you know, yet accept this, then I wouldn't still be posting. The fact you don't, is worrying and yes, I will post to try and correct you.