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Mental health

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Suddenly such a vulnerable day

30 replies

madmouse · 15/06/2012 13:09

As I've talked about many times on here I was very badly sexually abused between the ages of 7-11. Raped in different ways, separated emotionally from my parents etc.

It all came to the surface when I had ds (helplessly lying on my back in complicated labour woke it up and opened the floodgates). I've worked hard in therapy and life is generally really good.

And then out of the blue something comes back and I just feel small, alone, lost and wanting to cry. I hate it when that happens. Doing fine at work by smiling lots and being a bit loud but I just want to crawl into a ball.

I'm not sure where this bout has come from. It's just horrible.

OP posts:
madmouse · 16/06/2012 19:00

Hi Fuzzpig yes we are fb friends Smile

I have some rl friends I can talk to - just not the one I talk to most easily as he's just flown back in from a massive journey, is exhausted and has enough on his plate. I have tried to tell dh how I'm feeling but I do find it hard as his responses have in the past not always been helpful due to his own issues/personality.

OP posts:
kizzie · 16/06/2012 22:37

Ah sorry about the false steer madmouse. One of my colleagues has been doing a mindfulness course for her PTSD which she has found really helpful but it was different cause - didn't realise it wasn't suitable for all PTSD. Hope today has been a bit easier.

madmouse · 17/06/2012 15:44

My dear brother has chosen this of all weekends to get back in touch after several months. Our relationship is difficult because he is a convicted child sex offender (not against me, he is younger) although apparently now clean for many years. One of the things he has said this weekend (via email) is that I make it awkward to keep in touch as I will not have him on my fb (and apparently that is now THE way of keeping in touch) because I cannot sleep thinking that he can see pictures of the children in my life and then get excited by them. He says that won't happen.

I've put a lot of effort in my answers but I don't think it will go down well and I just want the whole thing to go away.

OP posts:
amillionyears · 17/06/2012 16:04

Oh yikes.Are you able to not look at your emails for a few days,until you feel better able to speak to him again?

fuzzpig · 17/06/2012 18:11

God madmouse that's awful, and I totally understand you not having him as an FB friend! Would you rather just cut him out altogether?

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