Keziah, City, Choc et al support thread

[Keziahhopes]

Hi - found us a new home. Just didn't like the title of my old thread - and have found your support so helpful but would also like this thread to be less egocentric .

Choc -hope cbt assessment goes well.

City - how are you doing?

My physio exercises are helping me, but don't see stroke consultant until beginning of July. Still not had OT assessment, but dont' think will need it by then - just been horrible for dh to do everything for me since Easter. Now more independend - just had my first shower by myself!!

Aarrgh!! Computer still being pain. If you don't hear from me for a while don't panic it's just techy problems. I tried to restore and update overnight but it hasn't worked properly and it's still taken an hour to get on to the internet (though I was able to do that without being in safe mode so a possible improvement???)

Other bad news is I've put on loads of weight (teach me for being so smug about the weight loss effect of venlafaxine - or it could just be all those whole packets of jelly babies, choc fingers, cookies, fresh homemade bread and cakes. Hmmm yes perhaps it is all that, lol !

Hope you two having better day xx

There , there, choc - thanks for warning us we might not hear from you for a bit , and every sympathy with infuriaating PC problems , which sound pretty identical to mine .< helpful >

Sorry I haven't managed to reply to your most recent post yet , which I really enjoyed

Ditto weight gain , though I daren't climb on the scales ... if I break into a feeble trot , everything wobbles < shudder > Think it was the one pound Smarties Easter eggs available since Christmas , as love the taste of chocolate squashed thinly also the huge meal portions & bags of unsalted crisps < off to buy wholesome food >

PS sorry Keziah , tactless to wail about these things when I live close to supermarkets with a decent choice , and am without armsful of tiny baby precluding meal preparation ! Hope you and baby are having a good day , and that yours improves, choc xxx

Yes to mini eggs and the lindt bunny

Hetre you go , Keziah< rustling and jingling of bunny bells >

Bah at baby D being too small for pictures of fluffy chicks & bunnies - I bet he'll get the idea if you tell him about Easter/ springtime things , though .

Are you planning to be like some of the very bad mummies on here who eat a large proportion of their dcs' Easter stash , or swap it for something of inferior quality as children only like rubbishy stuff anyway
< tsk tsk >

Good morning! Yeah Easter emoticons! So far, so good with the computer (of course it means I have to keep checking that it's still working by logging in and out - so you may see me a lot the next couple days (or until I've made copies of a zillion or so digital photos on the hard drive which I'm paranoid about losing)).

Merivel hope the very bad mummies thing wasn't aimed at me [bugrin]! There's no stash for dd. She is getting one very small egg (not quite mini egg size, lol!) and a choc bunny, but not Lindt because she's only a kid, right?! Funnily though, but unfortunately for me dd likes superior quality chocolate. When she was a toddler I deliberately bought 70% cocoa solid choc thinking that she wouldn't like it. She'd watch me eat it and beg me to let her try some. Eventually when I couldn't stand her whining any longer I said "ok but you won't like it" so of course she did like it, still does and now I have to share everything if she sees I have something (hence the need for secret eating [bugrin])

Yeah I don't know what possessed me to climb on the scales - I don't usually bother. Anyway, this afternoon I've been very good. I ran a total of 3 miles to and from supermarket, following dd on her bike. (Oh ok I half-ran, half-walked. Oh and I did have a muffin and hot choc in the cafe once there [bublush]. But even so...). Could really feel the extra pounds - had buttock wobbles, lol [bugrin]. I'm going to be really strict with myself from now on < choc only ate half a packet of jelly babies this evening [busmile] >

[bshock]No choc , wasn't talking about you - sorry that's how it read . At Easter I always see Mners mentioning squirrelling away the dcs' posh chocolate as they won't appreciate it < clever dd >
Yaaaaaaay at computer working OK and lots of checking it's still working

Wow , impressed that run was good - not only my backside that wobbles though in my defence , I obviously can't do much conventional exercise & am fond of secret eaing too , to guard poor Dh against unhealthy habits
< chomp chomp >

Would really like to ask you one or two questions sometime about appreciation/understanding of classical music. if you have time ? Sorry for horrifying pretentiousness re non-classicacal music , & thank you for being very careful not to say ancient band was before your time [bugrin]

Hope you won't have to do too much visiting / hosting for Easter , Keziah, and that no fond relative buys D a bunny suit

Right , am behind whole week's tasks as have been sleeping so much , but Dh really needs a drive to look at old gravestones [bugrin]

Sorry for typos & one missing set of bunny ears

Sorry for typos & one missing set of bunny ears

What's this driving to look at old gravestones? Dh not planning on removing some to use I hope? [bushock] [bugrin]

Fire away with the classical music questions. Can't guarantee any sensible answers though as I was (still am?!) a bit obsessive when it came to music. I had my favourite composer, Chopin and practised my way through my exams but that was it! As for any historical stuff...well you know my awful memory [bugrin])

I'm just calming down after on-edge day. Dd had another play date so of course have been stressing about it, on tenderhooks that she would behave herself. She wasn't too bad - nothing on the scale of Autumn half term - but even so just wish I could perform surgery on whichever part of her brain that causes her to be a complete little st!!! (Apologies Keziah [busmile]) I'm not betting on a return invite < choc sighs >.

Hope you've had a good Good Friday. No hot cross buns over here I'm afraid and I've scoffed the remaining pack of choc fingers so can't send any over. Next time...[bugrin]

Merivel - no bunny toys or Easter eggs for DS [busmile] thankfully. He got a lovely toy with a mirror, rattle and various other things that babies like on it [busmile] and hopefully some chocolate for his Mummy (she hopes - needing energy for feeding! Can't believe he will be 6 weeks old soon! Wow.

choc very impressed with piano playing. Does DD play (in her own way) yet? Shame this not one of Dd's best playdates - if I remember rightly, she has had some good once since Autumn that you quite enjoyed? Does bribery work (jelly babies?)

Ooh - has hot cross buns to share [busmile] - have a lovely weekend if you can. Just glad no snow stayed more than 24hrs here!! Phew!!

Mm - got grandparents coming.... but this time am determined that they will "help" and not cause me to be more tired and grumpy - last time I took baby upstairs at 6pm and they left next day not seeing either of us, I was so frustrated 's at her coping strategy that they certainly didn't like (not seeing baby when only reason they came!!)

< waves to Keziah* and choc > Almost six weeks already ! Wow indeed < passesK* more chocolate to fuel feeding > The toy sounds great [busmile]

Aghast at ILs' behaviour - what gets into some grandparents? I'd never hreard of behaviour like his till coming o Mn, where have seen v similar incidents to the ones you describe - and of course every poster on the threads was outraged for the new mother . Am sure they will wake up to themselves eventually .

There there, choc , sounds as though you did brilliantly with playdate . I do think the acting up could be that dd has had some deeply -buried stresses coming out , I don't know why I feel that- can you get remote instinct ?< extra pretentious> - as you put such a lot of care into her upbringing , & every single case is so different - but hopefully the whole thing will soon be forgotten , & you'll be able to put it down to settling-in to school stress .< imagines anticipating the playdates & realises should shut up >

Aha choc , Chopin ....- I know very little of his work but that's a coincidence as was wanting to ask prompted by someone's miraculous fight to live through concentration camp nurtured by Chopin's Etudes< cheery > Will dig out quotes later , but have realised need a few things from shop < tardy with tasks > All probably shut ... lovely summery twilight here just now

Have lovely peaceful weekend < passes round jelly babies >.

Argh , sorry , I don't like the way I sound in that last post < in strange mood after very irritating news > I was thinking only yesterday how ds is over 5 weeks , Keziah , & sorry for stupid speculation on important & sensitive topic , choc ( also for mentioning depressing topic on holiday weekend , but will dig out the musician's inspiring thoughts if I may )

at only 24 hours of snow, *Keziah...I do remember a snowy Easter, when I was 2 - I remember vicar doing a mass baptism & bribing all we small people with Easter chocolate (!) , and the bliss of playing in the snow with relative's cats < rambles>

No snow here thankfully (but lots of rain, grrrrr). Haven't got out of the house at all today. Keziah hope weekend passed without event and that grandparents were more useful than the last time. I feel blessed that I have the opposite and I'm getting so used to my dad being here. I had another lay-in this morning [busmile].

No Keziah dd is displaying no interest in the piano whatsoever. She's much more interested in wailing singing at the top of her voice (in tune though [buwink]). Plenty of time for Chopin though I reckon. Oh and yes you are right about a good earlier play date. A bit wearing on the nerves though "will she, won't she?!" [buconfused] I've put any future ones on hold for now. < choc wonders if boy children are any easier >

Yes Merivel I'm sure dd probably does have some deep-seated stresses - where did my daddy go is probably one of them [busad]. The more she acts up though the more you panic that there is something wrong with her. And the more you panic the more googleitis you get. The latest I've found is that oppositional defiant disorder describes her to a tee [bushock]. I guess diagnosed fucked up mother and undiagnosed but still fucked up father doesn't give her the best start. Oh well, at least she's brainy though that will keep her out of serious trouble perhaps? [bugrin]

All in all a very peaceful weekend here. Much gardening shopping on Saturday (honest [busmile]) have now got marigolds, nasturiums, blueberry plant/bush(??) and a butterfly and bee mix seeds to join the sweet peas and cosmos. Did manage to look at the violas and yes they are lovely but decided garden isn't large enough for anymore flowers. Must conserve space for edible plants got to manage on a reduced income.

Happy 6 week birthday to David [busmile]

Oh choc , I think it's more that dd can feel her mummy , grandad etc worrying for her, than about her daddy at present - not trying to minimise her loss . Very unsure about labels for dc , Keziah sure to be more knowledgeable than me - but whatever the manifestations dd might show now , does not meahave to bode ill for the future -except in stress for you as things gradually things improve . I thiought really hard befotre mentioning stresses , sorry for sensitivity of it all

So pleased you're both enjoying your Dad's good long stay[busmile]
and ooooooh so like the sound of all your plants ! Cosmos will dot about all over your garden , gorgeous

Sorry , will have to finish posting a bit later

• peaceful night allxxx < peeks in David's cot to see sleeping 6 week old >

Choc [busmile] at ... your seeds/plants sound lovely. Edible plants are great - I used to just put them in the flower border ... lettuce especially is pretty and economic (I refuse to pay £1 for a few leaves when can pick them as I want - or maybe I am just mean, hehe!!)

Well my red headed little boy is still red headed... wonders if he will go blond like his daddy or stay this way.

Getting him weighed tomorrow. He has a good appetite, so expecting a huge weight increase!! He is being less sick now he has 2 medicines to help, one being a milk thickener.

Choc = oppositional defiant disorder sounds just like what you could apply to most young children. They need to learn boundaries, consequences and rules of engagement. I guess those that are not defiant don't have boundaries to defy as much? My ds is going to have boundaries - so roll on the 2's!!

Oh grandparents more helpful - as my dh emailed them a list of jobs they were invited to help with! Ironing done, lawn cut, big mound of soil and slabs being sorted as I speak. Still having to cook etc but I made life easier this time with food!! I learnt from last time.

Hope the weight was what you hoped today , Keziah
Sorry am days behind with things in posts , says she inartculately

Awwwwww at red hair , always looks good - hm, dont know how often red changes to brown or blonde , but Dh has ash brown hair , with both blonde & black layers underneath , but a redhead's skintone & bright red beard if grown So the Cetic tendecies can blend with others - my DM has similar . All that sunscreen is a pain , though

Hope you're able to have a little time to yourself, choc , & will chatter more about garden & music when less sleepy , if you feel like it
Peaceful night to us allxxx

Thanks for asking - 8oz weight gain, less sickness helping! Don't have to get him weighed for 2 weeks now as he did so well thankfully.

Ah that's brilliant news , thanks Keziah . who's a clever infant - argh at the sickness & so glad medicines helping .

So pleased to hear your ILs have been doing something really useful insteadof rather than exhausting & stressing you . Please tell me you're getting some naps to help you during early times ? < remembers all the times have seen Mners say the first 3 months were a hellish blur >
Hope your OK with all the extra dd time , choc -thinking of you ! < soothing herbal tea >

Aha , agree K about planting veggies in flower borders etc . Ifd you're choosing moneysaving crops , choc

What do you like growing best Merivel? I find it great for my mental health, growing things that is. Last year I grew herbs for the first time - apart from the chives that I have had for a few years; Dh made me a raised container for my herbs. Mint has now taken over, but oregano and chives survived the winter too plus parsley. But the one I want and use lots is coriander and that was a disaster last year!

Dh being great with sleep - he gets up with every night feed currently, does nappy and settles ds down. So I feed while dh naps, then I sleep while dh puts little boy back in his cot.

got scary appoitnment with nasty psychiatrist changed, as had no one to look after ds the day of appointment - as got less than 2 weeks notice of appointment. no date for new one - what a shame it is delayed !!

Your Dh sounds a trouper , Keziah , & it all sounds a brilliant system . Makes me smile very happy to see you speak about your son - still can't believe he's here - still enjoying his pram , I hope ?

Heh at them having to change the appt due to their own short notice < everything crossed it goes OK > Am making lots of appts , & some will be scary , but having the support here has made such a difference

Growing stuff is massively therapeutic for me too , & others I know . Raised bed is by far the best way to grow IME so far , better soil composition & fewer pests
There there on the poor coriander- I always kill off basil that everyone else grows so easily & I love so much

I find it very calming preparing fresh veg even though can't spare the energy the lovely earthy / summery smell - potatoes , runner beans, mint lovely for this . So good picking sweet tomatoes -though have had all outdoor ones killed by blight 2 years running . Cucumber is a hilarious crop as very pretty "vine" but can take up a lot of room for a cheap crop - the spiky sort is slug resistant & amazingly sweet , like melon

Strawberries are indulgent , & sweetcorn maks me laugh , though I killed my few cobs last year through underwatering ... maybe not an ecofriendly crop .Massive fan of sprouting brocolli ,very delicate-tasting and as landlady has replaced porch , have a mini conservatory & my favourite crop is aubergine , from seed or plant- really not easy outdoors (Lidl seeds , 29p) but will rig up a cloche or something next time we move house ( or flat .. must grow veg )

Sorry garbled ... hope you get some time outdoors, choc, and your Dad takes up some of dd's energy

< brings selection of tiny sunhats for cooed-over little boy >

sorry for typos

< little wave from choc over here >

i've really enjoyed reading our thread this week - just sorry i haven't made it to post. thought i'd just drop a line let you know i'm still here (of sorts). very envious of aubergine crop merivel. And ds sounds charming Keziah. hopefully i'll be up to replying properly soon.

Sounds as though you've been having a hard time , choc{sad] . Can we help at all ? On other thread we have warm rugs , a real fire going , lots of gardeing to sit & watch , companion animalls bringingand lots of s, & I think all those are in order over here too.
Thank you for letting us know you're there & we'll be sending lots of positive thoughts

Obviously you don't feel up to any gardening etc, but saw this useful guide for veg www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/apr/13/sowing-veg-seeds-plants-gardening - I love reading about the possibilities

Hope you have a lovely weekend Keziah even though teeny sunhats will not be needed < stokes fire >

"On other thread we have warm rugs , a real fire going , lots of gardeing to sit & watch...etc"

Ah merivel definitely needed over here too thanks . Just the disconnected feelings bothering me again. So nothing major... just hazy. I haven't felt motivated to do any gardening but have been doing it anyway (on sort of autopilot). Will look into the guardian link you've posted thanks.

The excitement of the day was dd losing her first tooth. So now have to go find out how much a tooth is worth to the tooth fairy in 2012. Hopefully mn will come to my rescue . xx