Trih/Hair Pulling. Time to Stop.

[ashamedandhorrified]

I've been pulling out my own hair for 20 years now. This is something I"m completely ashamed of.

Mostly, I don't realise I"m doing it until it's too late, and by then I'm horrified by what I've done. Hence the name change.

The rest of my life is great. I did have a fairly traumatic experience when I was younger, which I don't want to get into as it's quite indentifying, but I wonder if that has caused this.

Anyway...I've been 'pull free' for 2 days now, and wondering if anyone else wants to join me in trying to stop this? Or even just offer some moral support. I can't tell anyone in RL, although they obviously know something is wrong.

I pick at my face at spots that aren't really there, and you wouldn't really notice. I have done it for years, I have only been wondering recently if this was 'mental health' related, then I saw your thread last week, then I clicked on one of the links to the blogs where it mentions face picking.

I have started fluoexetine this week, am on day 4 (for lots of reasons) but am hoping this may help the picking calm down. I didn't tell my doctor.

This is weird to admit out loud (although am hiding with a name change)

And apparently I can't spell seriously - ha am compete numpty!

I do think it is somehow related to self esteem, but at this point I'm not sure if I can properly articulate why I think this for me. I get the sabotage aspect, but sometimes I think it crosses over into a sort of calming thing (possibly why it still happens when relaxed/not really anxious).

I can sort of zone out, and it becomes quite focused, which is sort of calming in itself.

Sorry, think I am rambling.

Hi seriouslydidnotknow. We have pullers and pickers on this thread, so welcome .

It would be interesting to find out how you find the urges after the fluoexetine.

It is difficult to admit to these things 'out loud'. There seems to be such a stigma around them.

Are you trying to stop?

I'm now on day 23 and have pulled none. This is the longest I've ever managed. New target is 1 month!

How's everyone else doing?

Hi all. Having been struggling a bit over the past week and really finding it hard. I think there are several reasons why - the kids were off for half term and consequently it was difficult to get on the computer to check into the thread (which is helping alot). I realise also that the initial burst of determination is slowly eeking away and I'm into the hard slog bit. Also PMT which always makes me feel bleurgh. I think the picking is calming and comforting in a really backwards way so I know what you mean seriously.

I did actually end up pulling but only one, so I am trying not to be too hard on myself because in the grand scheme of things, that's not too bad. I am trying to be encouraging to myself rather than telling myself off iyswim. So, I just have to keep trying.

How are you getting on ashamed? You sound like you are doing really well. By my counting you must be really nearly to the month now?

How's everyone else doing?

Oh, and ashamed, what sort of numpty GP thinks anorexia/bullimia is going to go away by itself??

Hi FeelingBrave. Luckily I have good friends .

Sadly I didn't make it to 1 month completely pull free. I've pulled 3 hairs in the past couple of days . I think I wasn't checking in here enough, and also I've had bad PMT. I agree with you FeelingBrave that PMT and other stressful situations makes it much harder. So, like you, I'm not going to beat myself up about it. It's a month PRACTICALLY PULL FREE. I will not pull again, I will not pull again, I will not pull again. Although, as you say, the initial excitement/enthusiasm has worn a little thin.