im going to kill myself right now

[Misshousehunter]

that is it.,

please don't drink again if this is the effect it has on you, think of the effect this would have on your children and everyone around you, you obviously have a friend who cares about you very much.
I understand that you are crying for help, please do that, people on here are great and will offer you all the support you need, but ask for help do not post a thread title like this, iit is incredibly distressing for people. I normally stear well clear of any threads of this type, as I am sure many people do, who would offer you help and support if you just asked.
sorry am rambling now. It has taken me 2 years of counselling and ad's to get over the effect that someones attempted suicide had on me. I am just about there now but the person in question feels very guilty for the effect they had on me, which can't help at a time when they need to be kind to themself.

Both my parents attempted suicide when I was a teenager and I have never got over it 20 yrs later!
I know when you are feeling that low it is difficult to see outside your hurt.
Mu mum described it as looking down a dark tunnel and she could see no other option at the time.
I am surprised you haven't been refered to MHT yet. I know I have been struggling with depression for many years and it wasn't till I broke down infront of GP and said I couldn't go on that they took me seriously.
Could you go back with someone who could be more forceful and maybe kick up a bit of a fuss until the GP does something. Sometimes it is when you are feeling at your lowest that it can be the most difficult to made yourself heard.

Glad you are okay Misshousehunter. Was very worried about you.

Keep on at your GP to get yourself referred.

In the meantime get a copy of the book "mind over mood" or similiar workbooks from the library.

Eat well. A great book by Patrick Holford called New Optimum nutrition for the mind is also available from the library.

Exercise. You probably don't feel like it but even walking can lift the mood.

Good luck.

glad you ok misshousehunter, was thinking of you and worrying!
glad you feel you can say how you feel on here and if you ever need me to listen then find me on here.

make sure you hound your gp for help

take care xx

Glad you are ok and you got some support. Try and take someone strong to the GP to fight for you, or there will be a coachload of MNetters there to hound them for you.
Keep talking, lots of people on here who will listen.

You need to go to A&E when you feel like this and get them to refer you to the Adult Mental Health Crisis Team - they will come and see you in the hospital and refer you to Tier 3 services.

MissHouseHunter - why don't you start another thread in Mental Health just to talk about your situation (it means you can leave this one)?

MIght make it easier for people to talk to you as I would guess a fair few are put off or upset by the title.

Glad you are feeling different.

Hello, If you want someone to talk to...
I am a crisis line worker and I am available to help you. If just to talk. You are not your feelings and suicide does not own you. You still have a say in all of this and eventhough you may feel like you don't and maybe you feel powerless, you are the key. You my friend are not lost, and you may feel broken, crushed, abandoned, abused, mute but you have already come so far, and that speaks volumes that you are not defeated.

Mouse hunter,

I can see that you are havign a really difficult time.

If you were able to get to your nearest Samaritan centre, they will sit and talk to you confidentially. You never have to give your real name and you can sit and tell them how desperate you feel. They will never intervene, so you can talk to someone in confidence about your deepest, darkest fears and feelings knowing that you won't be judged and that by sharing that with someone else may help you find the first step forwards.

They are there for as long as you need them, they won't care if you turn up and stay for hours. They will want to just help you through this difficult time.

If you decide to call the local number should be in the yellow pages and its a local rate call as are the 0845 nubmer but if you have no credit, tell them and they will ring you back with no time limit.

I hope you can find the strength to talk to someone who can help you

hi mousehunter, someone i love suffers deppression and in the past all they wanted to do was die now they are happy with a wife and child they told me the other day how glad they are they never suceeded , i hope you feel better soon , keep pushing for help as doctors can be a bit crap sometimes think of the good things in your life and the people who love and care about you (even people on this site who dont know you care) take care and be good to yourself