Please help, i've never felt so desperate

[IHaveBeenSoStupid]

I'm really concerned I might be pregnant. I'm a fucking idiot.

Had unprotected sex recently (although he did withdraw in plenty of time, I do know this is still a big risk though)

I'm such an idiot. I already have one child. I was made a single parent (not my choice) over a year ago, and was stupidly flattered by someone showing an interest in me. I was drunk, so was he.

I need to wait another week before I can test to be sure. But I've had cramping almost constantly.

I feel like this is the end of my world.
What are my options? I absolutely cannot have another baby now, I have worked so, so hard to build a new life for me and my young child, and i just can't afford another baby.
I feel absolutely awful about it - my ex left us a week after I miscarried a year ago. I desperately wanted that baby now I'm considering terminating a pregnancy. What is wrong with me?

Is medical abortion quicker than surgical option?
I've booked a wonderful holiday for me and my child at the beginning of august, our first on our own. If I have to cancel this, I'll be devastated.

Can anyone advise what kind of time frame I'm looking at with these options?

Please don't judge me, I already hate myself for how incredibly stupid I've been.

I'm being STI tested soon too, incase I get flamed for that

Are you in time for the morning after pill?

No, unfortunately not. Another stupid decision.

I don't have any experience of abortions, so can't help, but I'm sure people will be able to advise.
In the meantime, have and take some deep breaths. There's no need to make a decision today.

Thank you xx
This is the first time I've told anyone how worried I am. I'm so scared.

Don't worry and don't be hard on yourself - you didn't get into this by yourself.

Others with more experience will be along soon. In the meantime, just echoing what chips said.

Look after yourself. 💐

I think there is something about getting the coil fitted and it works - up to 2 weeks after, I think. Ring your GP or family planning, they will go through the options with you.

Oh gosh, really?
I'll look into that now - thank you!

Based on personal experience, you still have time and you should be able to consider either option (medical or surgical).

Call any one of the local clinics - Marie Stopes, BPAS, Google will help - and they will tell you what to do next.

I visited my GP as well...cant remember why, I referred myself to BPAS from memory - but they were kind and reassuring.

Everyone fucks up, don't berate yourself too much. Just take one logical step at a time and stop panicking.

I think the coil only works up to five days after unprotected sex.
Deep breaths, the cramps could just be your period.
Medical abortion is very quick-tablets a few hours apart I think. Go to your GP or family planning asap to get options.
Good luck OP

Try not to beat yourself up, circumstances change and so can your reaction to the situation. I imagine few of us aren't guilty of making some dubious sexual choices under the influence of alcohol.

Take a pregnancy test and go and see your GP. There is a lot of support out there and this is not an insurmountable problem. I don't see any reason you'd have to cancel your holiday - if termination is the right choice for you it can easily be done before or after.

All the best OP, you can do this!

I think the early abortion is quicker with two pills swallowed.

You need to contact your GP for a referral ASAP. However I doubt he will refer you if you cannot provide a positive pregnancy result/test.

You can buy fast response ones that tell you five days earlier than the rest

I think the earliest I can take a test is Saturday, but even then it might not be accurate.
Thank you so much for all your kind words.
I'm just so angry that I've put myself in this position.
Living out the single parent stereotype aren't I?!

If I do get a positive result, how long would I have to wait to get the ball rolling?

Contact them now, don't wait. They will outline exactly what you can do and when you can do it. And yeah, shit happens, don't beat yourself up about it.

Should I go to gp or a marie stopes clinic? Does anyone know which is likely to be quicker?

I think that it's very unlikely that you're pregnant op. Did it happen around ovulation time?

I was on about day 16 of my cycle but cycle hasn't been very predictable lately so I'm not sure exactly

Will gp or clinic even see me without a positive test?

Although you are worried it's still not a given that you are pregnant. The gp or a pregnancy advice centre will not be able to help you till you know you are pregnant. Try to not worry (I know it's easy said than done)
Hopefully all the angst is for no reason and then you can move on and chalk this down to experience and not risk it again.
If you are pregnant then there are plenty of options and services out there that can support you!
Good luck!

Thank you x
I am guilty of catastrophising things, which I'm sure I'm doing now.
Just can't think of anything else at the moment.
I have to attend an appointment in an hour concerning a horrible prolapse I have following birth, which isn't helping my anxiety.

1. You are not an idiot If you sit with any group of women and mention "pregnancy scare", pretty much everyone has a story.

1. You are probably not pregnant. Seriously! Statistically it is very unlikely, however...

1. If it's been five days or less since you had unprotected sex, you still have options regarding emergency contraception.

1. Most home pregnancy tests will pick up a pregnancy, if there is one, within 14 days after unprotected sex. If you are still getting negative tests by 21 days, you can assume you are not pregnant.

1. Pregnancy blood tests give an earlier result than urine tests, they can be done as early as 7 days after unprotected sex, although I believe that they are more accurate the longer you wait. The disadvantages are that you'll probably have to wait for the results and I don't know if you'll be able to get the test on the NHS.

1. If you are pregnant the abortion pill is safe and very effective. I expect it's different for everyone, but you'll probably feel crampy and crap for a day, then it's not dissimilar to a regular period. Studies show that the vast, vast majority of women who choose to have abortions are happy with their decision (I think it was 95%, with most of the 5% who weren't happy feeling they had been coerced into it).

I would contact them now to see if you have emergency contraception options.

It has been 5 days since it happened, but I can't get out of work at all today.

Can you get to a pharmacy at lunchtime or on your way home? I think most Lloyds Pharmacies will prescribe it for immediate collection, and many are open late into the evening...

If you don't mind paying, you can do an online consultation with Lloyds and, so long as you complete it before 4pm today, arrange to collect it on your way home...

Here

There's a high chance it won't be effective though after 5 days isn't there?