Watching 8 month old at wedding on baby monitor?

[SpudMama321]

Hi all. Looking for advice. We are due to attend a wedding this weekend and our babysitter has pulled out. We are staying in onsite accommodation, but in a different building to the wedding itself which is a 3-5 minute walk away. She usually goes down between 7-8pm and sleeps through.

My question is - do you think one of us needs to stay with her all evening. Or, assuming the WiFi works well, do you think we can watch her on the baby monitor (which is a ring camera with an app on our phone) and go back to the wedding? I just rang the venue to check on the WiFi situation and they said we can't put her to bed and go back to the wedding (her opinion is we shouldn't do this because it's not in the building itself, I think) but I'm not sure I necessarily agree if we have the ring camera and a constant live stream. A 3-5 minute walk is a 2 minute jog for my husband. I am so torn! Will I just get a gut instinct when we arrive whether it's okay or not?

Because it is neglect to leave a baby unattended, completely alone in a building? I am shocked this has to be pointed out?
My daughter was alone sleeping in her cot in her room. I went to see how she was, she wasn´t crying, apparently asleep, but something told me to go closer. That´s when I saw all that milk, like a pool in her mouth, and I realised she was choking.
Would I have noticed that on a monitor? She really looked asleep and calm.

I totally understand where you’re coming from, I have very young children and can see your perspective. The truth is though, a few drinks in, you absolutely will not be glued to that monitor. There will be time lapses between checking the monitor, add to that the time to get to the baby… it’s not a reasonable risk I’m sorry to say. Rope in friends and family, keep the monitor anyway for reassurance and take turns with f&f, 30/45 mins at a time. It won’t be forever.

@SpudMama321 There are also 52 other family and friends staying there so she wouldn't have been alone at any point

Good try. If you had a baby who would not have been left alone at any point, why were you considering ring doorbells, monitors, talking to the hotel about wifi to see if you could hook these up. Why would your DH have had to run if there was a problem and ‘could have been there in minutes’? Makes no sense as it is not true. You didn’t intend to have a revolving cast of 52 family friends with them to ensure they would not have been alone at any point. At least you seem ashamed enough of what you were considering to try the back peddle/straight out lies, so there is some insight going on.

I don’t like to be all ‘judgey’ but Jesus Christ you are making it pretty impossible for me not to be…..are you bring serious?! Like honest to god, I am lost for words.

Forget usual bedtime. Keep her with you and then into pram when she falls asleep. I’ve done this at weddings and family parties. It’s one night, deviating from regular routine isn’t going to cause harm.

Wow this can’t be serious!!! Yeah maybe you can see her at all times but a fire, smoke inhalation, someone taking her will literally happen in the blink of an eye!! Think along the lines of Madeleine McCann….parents left her and look what happened!!

Anything could happen. So either one of you stays home with baby and lets the other go (has the bride and groom ok’d baby going btw?) or you keep her in the pram with ear defenders on and transfer her to the cot or you find another baby sitter 🤷🏼‍♀️

I don't think my parents used them but I was in a hotel room with my older siblings as a toddler, I wasn't alone.

Yeah I'm due to give birth next month and some of the advice is very overwhelming. I've ordered a carrycot so hopefully she'll be OK to sleep in whatever room I'm in, and my house will just have to be grubby for a while lol

Honestly if I was the receptionist I would make a report if I knew their details.

A report to whom?

Go onto a babysitting site and get a dbs checked babysitter to sit in the room with her whilst you are at the wedding.

This is something I do for people, they check my passport and dbs form on the night but they are uploaded on the site - though the client can't see the information.

You put to bed and the babysitter literally calls you if they wake. You can also have the wifi on and the ring door bell

https://www.childcare.co.uk/search/Jobs/Leamington+Spa/Babysitter

then you have all angles covered - wifi, ring doorbell watching babysitter who is dbs checked and they call you if baby wakes

Two options:
a) This post is click bait.
b) You're too fucking stupid to have children.

Wow I came to the conclusion this was some kind of wind up post to get clicks on the website but your actually a real person...and more worrying a real mother.

We are not disgusting because we thought you were leaving the baby the whole night, we're disgusted that you think it's OK to leave the baby at all, 10 minutes, 20 minutes, any amount of time!

Also if you would seriously consider any of this to be OK you are absolutely a neglectful mother.

Are you actually ok?!
Why this would even be a consideration baffles me!! Selfish to be more worried about missing the wedding party than keeping your child safe.
You either keep her with you and she has a later night/naps in the pram or you go back and stay with her.
Have you never heard of Madeline McCann?!

This cannot be real! If it is, you should have your child taken off you.

We know exactly what you ment! Now you’re back tracking!

Jeez is this a genuine post ?? It can’t be ?
the fact you’ve posted this tells me you know that’s it’s a no no !!!
if you want real clarification; ring social work and ask their views ?

Perhaps I didn't communicate this in my
post and re reading the above I don't think it's clear, but I meant could my partner pop over and watch the first dance for 10 minutes, for example, and then go back over.

It is just possible that it "isn't clear" - BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T SAY THIS IN YOUR OP.

What mother would even consider this? Im sorry but no way! Why cant you keep her with you? Ive had mine as babies in weddings and they would be changed into their pjays etc and placed in the pram to sleep at the wedding… with me..with plenty offering to push them etc to help them sleep. Why would you even consider keeping baby in a different building?

will ring notify you of a health and safety hazard such as a fire?!!! find another sitter!!

Please, OP, don't take us all for fools. All the responses you have received understood your post to mean you were considering leaving your baby alone in a separate building. That's what you said because that what you meant.

By that measure though, we need to be sitting in the same room as our child all the time when they’re asleep just in case something is wrong.

As I said in my post, ‘downstairs’ not alone in a building - the pp i was replying to was specifying just leaving a child in any hotel room, not in a separate building.

I wouldn’t dream of doing this and I’m a pretty relaxed parent.

In the 80s/90s it would have been more acceptable. Now though I wouldn't. I would see if you can get another babysitter or take turns being at the wedding. Every hour or so do a swap especially if you have more family members willing to help there. Reduces the amount of time people miss but definitely tag team or let her stay with you in a pushchair x

If anything serious happens you would hopefully get a lengthy prison sentence.

That’s not what you said originally though, is it!