Childminder lives with rapist

[OneBluePoster]

I know a childminder who works from her house, and has her rapist son living with her. He isnt charged, but has admitted to multiple rapes and there is evidence of him admitting this. What do you even do with this information, is this a safety concern?

I am not confused. I am aware they can go ahead without the victim and with an admission of guilt. however this is not my place, she has made it clear she does not wish to report him, and regardless of if they can make a case without her or not i would not wish to put her through that process or trauma when she is not ready. she may decide to in the future, but that will be on her own terms as it is her trauma and her story to report

A) If he has deleted the photos the police may still be able to see them on his phone because things don’t get permanently deleted the way you think they do.
B) How can the authorities intervene if no one reports what he is up to, if you report him he may not get charged but it may be enough for the authorities to decide a childminder can’t run if he is living in the house.

These are good points, thank you. I still will not be reporting the rape for her, the pictures are a different matter however. Thank you for your response

So he admitted the rape to you personally? And you know he has naked pictures?

If this is real, and I’m edgy, then you report everything you know to the police. Enough of this ‘I was advised’ bullshit, you report and they have a record of it and they make their own decisions as to whether to raid his house and check his devices.

But if you don’t do this, then frankly you’re part of the problem.

Is he an ex of yours or something?

I can't think why or how you'd be looking in his 'phone and allegedly finding pictures if he was just an 'acquaintance'.

Whatever happened, I don't understand why you wouldn't report someone immediately if you believed they had CSAM images on their 'phone?

This whole situation is very odd, including your behaviour.

How did you see them on his phone?

I have already stated i am taking action for the pictures and that i shouldve originally done that

no, and i wasnt going through his phone. he was on a chat with a person and it was in the chat as something he had sent. i immediately confronted him about it, and was told by him he would delete them. i asked around as to whether i could report it because i was unsure as had no evidence (again as said before didnt want indecent pictures of children on my phone as that would also be illegal) but knew if they were pictures of me i would want to know so asked around about what i should do, i was given different advice and stupidly chose to follow it which was a mistake. obviously now my actions will be different as i have stated many times now

Even if he has deleted the images the police may be able to recover them and trace his online activity to establish where he obtained them (and try to trace the victims). Please report this so that they can confiscate his devices and investigate.

Thank you i will be doing this

Only because the CPS prosecute such a miniscule proportion of reported cases because of the minimal chance of successful prosecution: they only usually take to court those where they have pretty much unequivocal proof, or the victim is mentally robust enough to withstand years of hell and inappropriate personal invasion into their private life in an attempt to discredit them, because the system also still involves huge invasion of their privacy and attempts to portray them as having “moral deficiencies” as though this excuses/ justifies rape, or the poor rapist allegedly may “not have realised” that their victim didn’t consent.

The fact that the very tiny proportion of reported rapes are prosecuted does not mean that the 99.9% that aren’t reported, or were reported and not prosecuted, weren’t rape.

Who on earth have you been discussing all this with? Why are they discouraging you to keep it secret?
I'm just not buying that anyone would sit on both multiple rape confessions (with evidence apparently) and CSAM. Something not adding up here. How long ago did you discover all this and why haven't you done anything?

Please do. We all need to report every instance of which we become aware of abuse of minors otherwise this will continue to proliferate.

They are on every street and get away with it because people don’t report. They can recover information from his devices but they need people to report so that they can confiscate and examine them.

So, he was in a chat with someone that was open to everyone that knows him and sent pictures of CSAM?

Again, that's very weird behaviour but if true, no idea why you 'asked around'.

'Asked around' to whom? instead of reporting it to the Police?

Your friendship group seems very strange.

you dont have to buy anything. ive explained why i havent acted on the rape confession, and as to why i didnt originally act on the pictures but that i will be now. this is all extremely recent, within the past two weeks

How do you know? A friend told you, the girl told you or you've seen it?

People have been attacked for others thinking they have raped/have been abusing kids. Sometimes completely incorrectly, as in they never had done these things, not whether vigilante justice is right/wrong.
It’s appalling and dangerous that this gossip is all over the neighbourhood. I appreciate you now say you have proof, not sure if anyone else has, but the right place to go with it is the police station and the right people to deal with it are the police. They can interrogate phones and retrieve deleted images.
Once the police are informed, and they know the place he lives has children, then they will also inform social services. Even if a criminal investigation goes nowhere the social will look into it. If the balance of probabilities is that he’s been inappropriate around children then his mum either has to move him out and not have him in her home at all or most likely she’ll be stopped from childminding even if the kids she has are a lot younger than those of whom you say he takes photos.
If she happens to continue to childmind then you must accept nothing that concerned the social was found. The social do not need criminal standard proof and are very risk averse, as they should be.
And ask all the others who ‘know’ to report as well - if it stands up to more than their neighbour’s cat told them.

@OneBluePoster please go to the police and tell them everything you know and the things you believe.

They have the technology and ability to investigate all your allegations.

this was not a chat open to everyone. it was a private chat between him and another person. ive already explained i asked around because there was no evidence and i was unsure on what to do. he is not my friendship group. and again as stated many many many times now i am acting on the photos, i followed poor advice and that was a mistake on my part but am rectifying it

You need to act on all of it. He's a danger to children and you have a duty to report everything you know!

i do not have a duty to report someone elses rape when they have made it clear they dont want to, other things yes i agree i have a duty to report but not her own story

When there are children in danger you absolutely do.

I can appreciate what you are saying and why. however I stand strong on my point that I will not be reporting her rape for her. this is a very personal choice and not something that should be forced upon anybody. the pictures are a different matter with a different course of action

Agreed.

But what do you propose to change this? or can be done to change this?

You admit it's a difficult allegation to charge so what needs to change in your view?

Because I don't think the narrative of 'what's the point?' is helpful at all.

Okay, so someone that is friends with him showed you many photos of CSAM that he had sent them? you previously said you had seen the pictures with 'your own eyes on HIS 'phone' so you've changed the story a lot.

And you asked who? if there was anything you could do?

Seriously, it's so clear what you should do and the person that showed you the pictures should have already done so.

That's why I say your friendship group is weird as you allegedly 'know' someone to be a multiple rapist, with evidence of them admitting it on multiple occasions? with evidence that you say you have. And you allegedly saw images of CSAM material sent by this person to a friend of yours, and the perpertrator is just an acquaintance of yours but you confronted him about the images? how? in person? on social media? you have each others numbers of accounts?

And then the people you know and asked about it said it couldn't be reported?

Again, what the hell is going on in your friendship group?