Childminder lives with rapist

[OneBluePoster]

I know a childminder who works from her house, and has her rapist son living with her. He isnt charged, but has admitted to multiple rapes and there is evidence of him admitting this. What do you even do with this information, is this a safety concern?

I'm not sure why you posted in ethical dilemmas.

And how did you find it when you're a new MN poster?

it came up in the list of topics when i wrote my post, i tried looking for a childcare topic but it didnt exist. wasnt sure what other topic to post under, i believed it was an ethical dilemma as i didnt know whether this was something i should be informing parents of etc i apologise if this is the wrong topic?

Spoken like some one who does not know how rape victims are treated by the justice system. A rapist is a rapist when they rape someone not when they are convicted of rape and rape victims can speak out about their lived experiences as and when they choose too.

Who would send their children there if this is common knowledge and such clear guilt?

can’t imagine her having any sort of business tbh.

if he has admitted it the police can still prosecute without the victim’s support of cooperation. I suggest those who have seen the admission report it.

the police absolutely can at least try to identify victims even without faces. There’s often embedded data in photos which can give location and other info.

this is good to know, i wasnt aware of this. thank you. as for it being common knowledge, its not common knowledge amongst the parents that send their children there

As he hasn’t been charged with anything, of course there’s nothing that can be done. If he’s admitted it, he clearly didn’t admit it to the police because he hasn’t been charged.

As for the photos on his phone, they were apparently not noticeably of anyone underage or they could have charged him with making or downloading child abuse images (whether there are faces in the pictures or not). Ultimately, you don’t know what this person has or hasn’t done.

Even if you did, there’s nothing that can be done because action can’t be taken against someone when they haven’t been convicted of any wrongdoing. A woman can’t be told not to look after kids at her house because of an accusation that resulted in no action.

He isn't a rapist if he hasn't been convicted. He may not be! These are rumours and If true very damaging

That is a criminal offence itself so report it to the police.

This is a very naive view - do you really believe the conviction rates for rape actually reflect the reality of how many rapists there are in this country?!

If they are faceless photos how so you know they are underage? How would you tell a naked 15 year old headless photo from a consenting 16yr old? Or 18 yr old.

There will.be more to it than that.

It is common knowledge if you know that he has admitted on multiple occasions to multiple rapes and you believe his Mum knows too.

Common knowledge means just that, common. it doesn't mean everyone. Or that anything is proven.

How old is he? And how do you know so much about his alleged criminal activity and contents of his 'phone?

i assumed from their underdeveloped bodies? but this was confirmed by him when i confronted him about it

Of course not but I also know (an ex friend of mine) falsely accused her ex boyfriend of rape. It went as far as court when she admitted she has lied because she was pissed he dumped her!
He never escaped the rumour mill affecting his future relationships and mental health. It happens!

hes in his twenties. i was associated with him, i dont know about the contents of his phone only those pictures as i saw them

So he's admitted to multiple rapes on multiple occasions and you have evidence of that? and shown you naked pictures of possible children on his 'phone?

That's very unusual behaviour but you can report it to the Police. I don't see why it's an ethical dilemma or any dilemma?

Taking this thread at face value, and I have my doubts, report it to Ofsted and provide as much detail as you can, then you carry on and you mind your own business. You don't have the right to hear what happens with any information once it is passed on. Simple.

Given that less than 10% of rapes are reported and less than 1% of those that are reported are prosecuted successfully because it’s a very hard crime to prove even when the person is guilty, for every convicted rapist there are 999 (at least) unconvicted rapists loose in society.

there is evidence if him admitting the rapes, but the woman does not want to report it and as previously stated its not my place to report for her or force her into it. he didnt show me the pictures, i saw them accidentally on his phone. i was given different advice at the time but now i have this advice i will obviously be acting differently about the pictures

OP possessing photos of underage girls is evidence of child abuse crimes and can carry a prison sentence. I don’t know how you know that he possesses child abuse images but you state this as a fact so report it to the police. Given the previous reports of rape already on file one would hope they would arrest him, confiscate his phone, find the images and prosecute. He will then also be on the sex offender’s register which will offer some protection to the children of anybody who may get into a relationship with him in the future and will prevent him from living with a childminder.

To be clear, there are no reports of rape on file as she does not wish to report. I believe he no longer has the images on his phone (if he is telling the truth) but will be taking action on that subject anyway, thank you

Rape is the crime that juries find guilty far more than any other serious crime.

That's not to say that it's easy to get a charge as you say, it isn't. But if you can get it to court, the odds are in the victims favour.

I understand the difficulties around it and have been a victim myself but I think the whole 'don't even bother to repot' narrative I see a lot on MN and in other spaces is really damaging and inaccurate.

I assume you don’t have a child at this childminder?

When you say that he ‘showed you photos of teenage girls’ - was he also a teenager? Because I think this is a fairly important distinction.

Personally, if you believe what you are saying is true, I would be anonymously reporting to police, children’s safeguarding and ofsted. Whether they choose to do anything with what you disclose is up to them, but at least your conscience is clear.

Well then you or anyone else who have witnessed his admission need to report it if she won’t.

like I said, if there is enough evidence for the cps to prosecute, they can. Whether the victim wants to or not. Witnesses can provide statements to his confession, and that may be enough.

you seem to be confused- in other countries such as the us a victim can decide whether a case is taken forward. Not so in the Uk, precisely for this reason- domestic abuse, rape etc where a victim may not want to assist the investigation. Even if they withdraw their complaint, it can still go forward if the police can put together a case from other evidence.

i do not have a child with this childminder. he didnt ‘show me’ these photos, i came across them. i was not willingly shown these photos. i dont know if he was a teenager? i wouldnt know that, what i do know is he isnt a teenager now. but yes as said before i will be taking action for the photos which i should have done originally in the first place, thank you