FIL caught drink driving

[CrazyGoatLady]

FIL (73) drove home from the pub on Christmas Eve, got pulled over for speeding and was over the limit. Said he'd barely had anything to drink, but his brother said he had 6 pints over around 4hrs so he must have been well over. It was about a 5 mile drive home, but on a stretch of A road that often has patrols on it. Fool!

We've had rows over it before and I've said if he ever did it with DC in the car I'd shop him myself. Nobody else was with him on this occasion.

FIL now wants us to help him pay for a good solicitor as he is going to opt for court to try and avoid a ban, as GMIL is very elderly, losing it a bit, and FIL is very involved with her care, he drives over to her house most days. I do not want to give him a penny, as he's been drink driving for years and I hate his attitude, nanny state, they just want your money, I'm a careful driver, it's fine, blah blah. DH is angry with him, but wavering for GMIL's sake.

If DH wants to help I can't stop him, but I don't want him using our joint/family funds to help him weasel his way out, and I feel like he should have thought of his elderly mother before getting in the car after 6 pints. Am I being mean here?

It’s a mandatory ban so unless he’s claiming someone spiked his lemonade with six pints or that the police equipment was faulty he’s getting banned.

That would be a no from me. If I called anything divine intervention, which I don't, this would be it!

I bet he thinks he's a better driver drunk than most people are sober. Idiot.

Don't give him a penny.

He wouldn’t get a penny from me @CrazyGoatLady

Make other arrangements for GMIL. Instead of money for a solicitor for FIL to drive his mum while drinking, set up an account with a taxi firm for GMIL to go where she pleases when she wants to. She will value the freedom of not having to depend on a drunk driving son.

Unfortunately there are cases were a good solicitor can get someone off on a technicality, eg if the equipment wasn't signed off as calibrated (they can request the records). Happens but rarely of course. Definitely don't help him!

Drink driving virtually always ends in a ban unless your drink was spiked or there was some kind of emergency. You could plead (first offense) for a reduced ban on the grounds of caring for an elderly relative but it would likely still be a ban and he would likely still have to complete a course. If your FIL wants a solicitor, get him to pay for them.

It’s all on him and he deserves a ban. You aren’t being mean at all and I’d actually be fuming if my husband gave him money to try and wriggle his way out of this one.

Arsehole

Too stupid to only break one law at a time!

Drunk and speeding.

I agree with this. You all have a moral responsibility to other road users to report him and tell him with no hesitation he is putting other peoples lives in danger. By doing nothing you standing back and literally waiting for an accident to happen. I feel sorry for the people reading this who know first hand the misery these people cause by taking no responsibility whatsoever. In my view anyone that drives under the influence of alcohol or drugs should have more than a ban. If they hit any other vehical it should be attempted murder as you knowingly set out to do this. It’s not even a worry for these people. That has to change. I hope he gets the consequences. If my hb was supporting behaviour that encourages drink driving I’d really struggle to be any part of being with him- it crosses such a big line.

Unless he was driving in a life or death situation he's absolutely going to get banned. Save your money. Sounds like he needs to learn a lesson for everyone's sake.

Too soft. Absolute fucking arsehole

you should shop him every time. Not just if he has Your kids in the car. Fucking disgrace of a man.

someone suggested a taxi account for GMIL - much much better plan than bailing out this utterly selfish wanker

Tell your DH that even a penny of your family funds will go to protect a drink driver only over his dead body and the whole of MN will help to dig the hole under the patio and provide an alibi.

@CrazyGoatLady FIL now wants us to help him pay for a good solicitor

Why can he not pay for one himself?

Fuck(ed) Around and Found Out

I blocked my own FIL in who tried to drink drive although I suspect he’d done it before. He’d certainly had a ban in the 80s for it and I can’t imagine he refrained between 1983 and 2021.

i then shopped him for driving with impaired sight after a head injury. He wants his licence back but luckily can’t actually see well enough to do the paperwork.

He hates me for it but fk it I’d rather that than him being on the road

Drink driving is an automatic ban so there's no point spending money to try and get out of it.

I wouldn’t even consider wasting money on this. Stupid man could have killed someone. He can sell his car and use that money for taxis to GMIL.

He’s wasting his time fighting it. Don’t give him a penny. I can’t stand drink drivers.

We know someone who is in his late 90s and who has a couple of mild strokes. His vision is impaired as is his driving. He got his licence back after his GP asked him if he felt able to drive.

I shopped him the second i saw him drink 3 glasses of red and drive home from the pub. The distance was well under a mile, but seeing him go down the wrong way of a one way street.... you can do it anonymously online.

?? How does that work, surely reporting it online doesn’t lead to a fast enough response to arrest someone who is currently driving under a mile? Ie 10 minutes worth of driving

No excuse to be honest for drink drivers he should be banned

My brother's friend was killed by a drunk driver. It was a back road in the middle of nowhere (between villages) she was walking home as she missed the last bus. He mounted the kerb and killed her. You're not mean or unreasonable and regardless of solicitors he'll get a 12 month ban anyway.

Fu*k around and find out