My dad has come to my house to die..

[KitsyWitsy]

Gave me his will and deeds to his house earlier. Came on Tuesday after ringing me asking to come get him. He is frail and deteriorating but I don’t know that he is actually dying. I do know that he can’t really go home anymore. He needs to be with me and he is currently staying in my bedroom which is on the ground floor next to the downstairs toilet which is perfect. I am on the sofa bed and don’t mind at all.

I guess I just wanted to ask if anyone has any advice for me? I don’t know what to do really other than take care of him. He doesn’t want to see a doctor or anything and doesn’t have any particular symptoms of anything. He’s just wobbly and frail.

I have three disabled children so my hands were already full. Just a bit stressed out really. He just had a little fall earlier and it’s not going to be the last one the way he’s going.

Even if you stayed with your Dad 24/7 @KitsyWitsy He could quite possibly pass while you are away getting something to eat, going to the loo or something else for a few minutes. It often happens that way, so I do think you are doing the right thing to do what you need to do in your own home and sleep in your own bed. It's hard, but it's good you have realised you do need to look after yourself too.

Been thinking about you. Take Care

You've made the right decision. When I lost my Dad I didn't spend all day every day with him because like you not eating properly or getting proper sleep was making me ill and he wouldn't have wanted that. You have to remember to look after yourself.

Oh my! That reflects my experience when DH was end of life. It was so quick

I'm glad you've come home for a rest. You've really done all you can.

The last stages can be tough for the loved ones, take good care of yourself. I am keeping you and your dad in my thoughts today x

When my Mum was in a hospice the nurses were scarily accurate with when she was going to go. The called me about 3:30 am, and she was gone within two hours of us getting there.

KitryWitsy, i am so glad you had your Dad at your home for a few weeks but he is in the best place for him now. You can't be there 24/7 with him but he will know you have been there. My lovely dad waited until i had left before he went but i think that would have been they way he wanted it. Take care of yourself and i wish your dad peace in his last few days

Oh OP, thinking of you ❤️

I just want to say I read the thread and am thinking of you and your lovely dad.

Isn't it amazing that he just knew his time was almost up - or decided it was - and came to yours 3 weeks ago?

I hope he has a very smooth passing and you look after yourself and have plenty of support.

What a lovely daughter you are. Am sorry you are going through this.

He is still going. He has been moved to a different ward now but is in his own room still and we can come and go as we please. We went down twice yesterday but it will probably be tonight when I can get down there today. He is still receiving very good care.

More bloody riots planned for tonight but we shouldn’t be affected.

Take care of yourself KitsyWitsy, he's lucky to have you.

I got a sinking feeling when I saw you'd updated your message so I am glad that instead things were okay at your time of posting.
Do insist in a pleasant way that they keep you posted if his condition changes.
Maybe bring in an iPod or some such thing with earphones with his fave music for a few minutes of play when you next go?

Thinking of you, brings back memories of my Dad. He had a heart problem and we were told he wouldn't be coming home - they expected him to last 48 hours. 12 days later Dad finally died and after being there every day he died around 6 am before I arrived that morning. My Dad was also moved after a few days into a private room. I felt helpless, expect you feel the same.

He has passed. :(

Thank you everyone for your thoughts.

I'm so sorry xx

Really sorry to hear that @KitsyWitsy im glad he’d made his way to you x rest in peace for him x

My condolences, I'm so sorry about your loss xx

I’m sorry to hear your dad passed away, he spend the last of his time with you which is what he wanted.

Oh I just came back to the thread to check in and I'm so sorry to hear your news.

I am so sorry.

I am so sorry, but he had a peaceful end

So sorry x

So sorry for your loss. You have loved him to the end.

I'm so sorry. May his memory be a blessing.
He's now at peace, he knew that you loved him and he loved you.