Music practice - if your kids do it, how do you get them to do it, if they don't, why don't you make them?

[tortoiseSHELL]

As a piano teacher I am CONSTANLY amazed at the money parents pay for piano lessons, and then don't make their children practise - thus wasting the money imo! Can't think why this is. I always thought it must be impossible to actually get them to practise, but now ds1 is doing violin and piano, I realise it isn't, you just make them do it.

So - if your children learn instruments, how much practice do you insist that they do each day, what is your method of achieving this, and if they don't practise, why don't you make them? And do you mind wasting all that money on lessons?

Thank you! This is to help me as a piano teacher, not as a parent, as atm ds1 does his practice with no problem, I need schemes for my pupils' parents! I have suggested sticker charts, rewards charts, having a set time each day, doing 5 mins 3 times a day, doing 15mins in one go...am out of ideas!

Glory be! DS3 now has the sax in his mitts, and has been practising constantly (and loudly) since Thursday.

DS2 picked up the cello that evening without any prompting and practised, but the bridge has been knocked out of place, so he can't practise now until his lesson on Thursday.

(I think it's just been knocked, rather than pushed, lol).

This is a great question. My 7yo has been learning piano for a year. It was my suggestion because music is good for brain development, and it’s a great skill toy have. I did a lot of music at school and got a lot out of it. But my son was keen too and very excited when the new P45 keyboard arrived.

However one year on and its been nigh impossible to get him to practice. I have tried bribes and sticker charts and role modelling (I’ve decided to take grade 5 and practice every day) and nothing works.

To get him to do it I have to physically force him which involves sitting behind him on the stool and literally putting his hands on the keyboard. There is at least 30 minutes of crying and wailing and refusing until eventually he does about 5 minutes of quite good practice, then he refuses to do any more.

This term I’ve reluctantly decided that he’s either not old enough and/or not motivated enough so he’s giving up.

This thread is 13 years old!

As a piano teacher, I expect the OP is able to support the practice more than others which would help for her own child. I think it also depends on the age of the child. DD doesn't enjoy her music but I think it is good for her to be included in bands etc at school (and has made friends through this). She used to be self motivated with it when she was little but now we battle to make sure she does enough at home to stay in bands, go on tours etc. That's about 15 -20 mins 4 times a week. She is now grade 5 or 6 and is in y8. She isn't an independent learner and doesn't always follow what the teacher says. She and I both get cross with each other as she isn't sure what to do and I am not sure how to help her. She learns at school so I don't ever see the teacher to ask them to explain the breathing technique etc. She also does dance and is so much more motivated with it. I think her unwillingness to practise is as much linked to the quality of her teaching/ explanations of technique etc as anything else. As she gets further on she needs a clear understanding of what she has to do to improve to be self motivated. It is the same with her school subjects. She engages less when the teachers are weaker.

My children learn musical instruments and one is very talented (for their age). As far as I am concerned, music practice is as much part of our family routine as reading practice, bedtime stories, timetables and baths. My mantra is little and often. Better five minutes every day than half an hour the night before the lesson. If it drags on then it stops being fun. Also, I think parents should also sit with their children and support their practice until they are old enough to get on with it themselves, at which point the ability to practice for longer periods take off.

Just seen that this is a revived thread. Oh well. I hope the little and often mantra helps someone.