will someone scold and spank me and remined me I am a stubborn socialist guardianista?

[twinsetandpearls]

I have always made my feelings clear about private schools but the family has been working on me again and have ordered a proespectus for a private school that I have been idly flicking through and I have fallen in love with it and even - and this is a big deal for me - looked at the website.

For me this is a huge step and I am feeling sick with guilt, so guilty in fact that I have just re planned all my lessons tomorrow for my classes as some kind of penenance.

I need other socialist guardianistas to take me in hand.

localgirl I hope I do resist and I intend to.

I'm not keen on 'chav' myself really. Don't know why I chose that word. Of course it would be hard to move to a council estate - it would be a huge culture-shock. You wouldn't do it any more than I would. So let's stop pretending to feel guilty about having a decent standard of living.

You make some good points but I don't know about point 5 - I believe in keeping home and work separate. It's no business of the families you work with where you choose to school your children.

We are building the society in which our children will live. We wash our hands of everyone else's problems, our children live with the results.

I know I sound preachy when I say stuff like this. I am a bit . But I feel so strongly that this "I will do what is best for my children regardless of the effect on others" attitude is misguided and in the long term will end up affecting our children in a negative way.

You won't be able to tsap because in the end you will want what it best for your kids, we all do I don't blame you for that one bit

I am incoherent. Wine.

Don't we all want what is best for our children?

We are held back not by wanting less then the best, but by what we a) feel able to do and b) are constrained from doing by cirumstances and finances.

well mamfm what would you do if you had means. Send your children to a sink school and let them sink or, if you had the choice, send them to a better one In reality I mean, not what you think or say you would do, which was my original point

Actuallu unquietdad I grew up on council estates and work on one so don't have a fear of them, I also lived on an estate just after having dd and can tell you it was a lot nicer than the homeless hostel that I lived in before that.

I wouldn't move back to a council estate now as that would just be silly but thatdoen't mean I don;t feel guilty about having a relatively good standard of living as I remember whatit feels like to be living on or under the breadline. I was lucky to have my education to escape that life so that my dd will never have to repeat the difficult circumstances of her early years. It makes me feel guilty that not everyone has the chance to make choices in their life as I have.

Agree with UQD

Perhaps incoherent meandmyflyingmachine but I agree with you.

tsap - Feeling guilty is not a bad thing but it is if it stops you doing the best for your children

That makes more sense - knowing you are lucky being in a position to make choices. I can see where you are coming from with that.

From what you have said, I'm sure your work will help people to make choices who wouldn't otherwise be able to...?

UnquietDad perhaps I should keep my work and home separate but in this town everyone knows everyones business and we are very suspicious of outsiders. The families I work with know I have been through what they have, so I can say I understand and I mean it.

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Anyway tsap will be interested to see in the end what you do - as I started off saying, many people say one thing but in the end, when push comes to shove, the decision they make does not alwaysreflect what they thought they would do before they had to do it ifswim Hope it turns out well for you and yours anyway

aintnomountain,

Unless you're going to home ed your dcs you will not avoid SATS, my daughter in yr2 at an independent school has just completed them.

localgirl but by sending her to the local state school I will not be harming her, she just won't get to wear a daft hat and eather dinner in an oak pannelled room. IT may do DD some good to learn sometimes you don't get everything that you want.

I so obvioulsly aren't what???

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tsap - yes I'm not saying for a minute she will be badly off, just that if it was me and I had a choice, in the end I wouldn;t be able to resist it - they only get one chance, we all do and they rely on you to look out for them and do what you think is right. I'm sure she'll be fine either way

Yes my work does help people make those choices and dp is in agreement with many of you on here by saying that we do enough for the state sector to be able to leave it without feeling guilty.

He wants us to take the inlaws for a drive up tomorrow to show them the grounds and to send back the paperwork with a cheque on Monday so we can gett dd name down so she can hopefully start by year 3.

i think icod has been on wine.......

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Why can't i be a socialist?