will someone scold and spank me and remined me I am a stubborn socialist guardianista?

[twinsetandpearls]

I have always made my feelings clear about private schools but the family has been working on me again and have ordered a proespectus for a private school that I have been idly flicking through and I have fallen in love with it and even - and this is a big deal for me - looked at the website.

For me this is a huge step and I am feeling sick with guilt, so guilty in fact that I have just re planned all my lessons tomorrow for my classes as some kind of penenance.

I need other socialist guardianistas to take me in hand.

It would be cruel to put him through it.

St mary's Hall Clitheroe followed by Stonhurst. Quips about priests and little boys count as too obvious to be amusing.

I haven't looked at a private school everyone else is doing it for me and filing dd head with tales of grandeur while making out that I am a mother from hell for even contemplating sending dd to the local comp.

god twinset if you really are struggling with your conscience then this bit must make you want to beat yoruself around the head:

"A group of pupils and staff from St Michael and St John Roman Catholic Primary School attended the Stonyhurst College Physics Space Fair. They set off to explore four ?space stations? viewing distant galaxies on a virtual modern astronomical observatory, setting off champagne rockets, and making and viewing telescopes.

A presentation on the first manned missions and moon landings was held in the historical setting of the old observatory. Drinks and goodies were a welcome retreat from the sudden downpour before the spectacular launch of larger rockets in the Jesuit gardens. "

lets show the local kids what they are missing

[ponce alert]

THey have an astronomy tutor

Parents evening or a quick chat while we try to remember who your kid is as we call it in sink school land consists of a weekend of discussion, high teas and sporting extravaganzas

OK, I appreciate all the cheshire mums are goign to come out and tell me about their state comp's astronomy and astrophysics tutors, but I suspect that there are very few state comp with astronomy tutors? As well as only a few with observatories?

And I'm pretty sure that even a glut of middle classes won't chnage that...

How do I know? I suppose I'm just interested and I've had 22 years of children and looking at private schools for them and my ex husband was in state and private system and involved with quite a lot of schools and our friends would teach in them etc and people do talk about their schools in London however odious that might seem - so you know who went to Millfield - the one with dylexia who would never have got into one higher up the league tables etc. The private schools can do a very good job with the not so bright as the bright. I would imagine Stonyhurst was comprehensive (except most will be paying fees). It's not like Manchester Grammar - very academic private with lots of competition for each place so presumably it would well suit someone who wants a fairly inclusive and Catholic education with children of all abilities very well.

I sympathise with your frustration that DD would have been perfectly happy at the state school had she not become aware of St Mary's Hall.

Before we relocated we looked at the local state and private schools, and once we'd seen the facilities at the private schools, we found it very difficult to drum up any enthusiasm for the state school.

What parent isn't going to enthuse about a school that offers your child so many opportunities, in a beautiful environment?

Since we relocated, I have made the conscious decision not even to look at the private schools locally as I learned to my cost that for me there was no such thing as "just looking". Just to look was a step towards choosing a private school. Be warned

Sorry you can't have any more children, btw. Your DD is clearly very precious to you.

The child has a chance of a better education but will not take it up. This is not due to the ruling classes trying to grind down the poor nor the Right Wing trying to buy privilege nor any other such tosh. It is her own mother who will deny her the chance.
Hurrah for Socialism!

"would well suit someone who wants a fairly inclusive and Catholic education with children of all abilities very well. "

At last a meeting of our minds that is exactly what i want from either the state or independent sector

I suppose guardianistaNOT it is which I see as a greater evil dd not getting to study astronomy whilst wearing gaberdine as she skips through the perfectly set out school gardens or me contributing to a divisive education sysytem.

I will not harm her going through the state system and I can assure you that as I will only have one chance at motherhood I would take dd out of any school that I thought was harming her.

It is all on the backburner or a while though as OFSTED are on their way into the school I teach in at the end of the week.

just checked in and can't believe this thread is still running. Love the point made by guardianistNOT. She has hit it spot on. Exactly. Socialism is actually all about NOT giving everyone the best chances, just what someone else decides is best for them. Just like religion, it takes away all the individual thinking and aspiration replaces it with whatever is the dumbed down lowest common denominator. (And all the time the people at the top of both regimes still stay there unaffected by it all)Nevertheless at the end of the day FGS tsap do it, don't do it. Whatever. If you were really sure of your convictions you wouldn't be asking the question imo

twin, so yes my quote is what I think you get at Stonyhurst so that's the answer - choose it on those grounds, it's inclusiveness, moral values etc. That would help you achieve the mental step to accepting it.

The communists in China in the early days wrestled with these issues, sometimes ensuring their own children had a worse time and education than others to iron out the advantages they had from being children of educated parents. I don't think it really worked very well and then corruption seemed to win the day, party officials getting better schools never mind worst. Animal Farm etc.

Yes, the children of the left wing are kept out of good schools. Many can't even live with grammar schools or faith schools either if they're particularly left wing as both the latter are arguably just as objectionable.

It has not been just me posting to this thread I have been responding to people's points and in the space of five days have managed to resolve a debate that has been rumbling away quietly in our house for a few years, and I have been greatful to the people on here who have taken time to play devils advocate and both challenge and support my views. I didn't realise however that I needed to reevaluate my principles and make a decision that would affect dd whole life according to the mumsnet timetable.

Having been told me to shut up and fuck off I will do.

Localgirl - remember you have a choice. You don't have to look at the thread!

No, don't shut up. It's been interesting.
Yes, it will affect her for the rest of her life. Often your friends from school are friends for life so her friends may differ from those at the comprehensive. Also the 7% at private schools get 50% of the good university places and earn more throughout their lives on average etc etc so you buy her huge advantage on a life long basis unless that school gets worse exam results than the comp - I haven't checked but I very much doubt it. She might also be taught better how to consider others. I suspect the teaching of Catholicism is better at Stonyhurst than at state Catholic schools.

There's more to life than money Xenia!

Come back, TSAP - this is a really interesting debate! People who aren't interested don't have to join in!

TS&P - I personally would be very interested to hear the decision you make. When you've made it, that is. So do please add a postscript. Whichever way you go, I am sure that your daughter will do well. Good luck.

It has been an interesting thread tsap and having reviewed it,I didn't mean to sound so harsh in my earlier post.I can be a moody cow myself sometimes! I also wish you well in your decision, and of course, you don't have to make the decision according to the mumnset timetable! Goodluck whatever, is more close to what I meant than what I said. No matter what you choose,having thoughtful and caring parents in the end will have just as big an impact on your dd's future,as the school you choose so don't beat yourself up either way.