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Original poster

top grammar vs top private

196 replies

darleneconnor · 02/02/2011 17:32

For argument sake say you had to choose between a top (ie top 20) state grammar and a top private school which would you go for?

Assume no financial constraints and no objections to the principle of private education.

OP posts:
GrimmaTheNome · 03/02/2011 13:14

Also because science pays relatively low wages.

which is a bit shit because these are the industries which can create wealth. Not just shift it around.

If we don't have exporting industries which create real money then sooner or later there won't be any well paying jobs in law, medicine, etc because there won't be anything to pay with (I'm sure the bankers will always contrive to line their pockets)

HildegardVonBlingen · 03/02/2011 13:15

My apologies, Joni. And I agree re. hypocritical media types!

seeker · 03/02/2011 13:17

AH. Just spotted the key comment in this whome debate.

"Who can blame the kids for wanting the best paid jobs?"

I can, actually. I don't want my children's primary motivation to be making lots of money.

Lilymaid · 03/02/2011 13:19

Nobel Prize laureates by secondary school.

MickeyMixer · 03/02/2011 13:20

I went to top private school and I now coach kids for grammar/public school exams. I would say - save your money - put it into a trustfund for your child's wedding/university/first house and make the most of the excellent grammar school you have available. You can always move him/her later if its not working out. Much harder to go the other way.

MarshaBrady · 03/02/2011 13:23

Very interesting Lilymaid.

(and bizarrely coincides with what I am reading, the brilliant The Bonfire of the Vanities. All about the Bronx and banking!.

GrimmaTheNome · 03/02/2011 13:27

Unfortunately too incomplete a list to show anything one way or t'other though.

Litchick · 03/02/2011 13:28

Seeker in a world where house prices are ridiculous, and living expenses are soaring.

Where the state is being decimated and our DC's will need their own pensions, health insurance etc. Where loans for degrees are likely to reach tens of thousands.

I would say that not advising your DC that they will need a fair bit of money to live on and look after their own DC is pretty darn foolish.

I grew up poor and it was crap.

propatria · 03/02/2011 14:19

Think you need to do a bit more research on OE nobel prize winners,theres at least one very well known one and Im pretty sure hes not alone,cant speak for the other place.

GrimmaTheNome · 03/02/2011 15:13

There may well be, I'd only got about 1/3 down the list and googling directly hadn't turned up any OE science nobels for me (who was it, just curious? Smile

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 15:14

@duchesse common knowledge amongst parents whose children do not go there perhaps. Not actually the truth, though. You know very little about the school, clearly.

And my question wasn't a silly question at all - if you were so relieved they didn't get in then why try to send them there in the first place - if you didn't think it was the right place for them. I think the silliness was clearly your initial statement which you now seem to be trying to retract, in a roundabout way.

I have read several posts by you, on Mumsnet, about this GS, stretching back many years. You clearly have a bee in your bonnet about the school and I think that's really sad, to be honest. You DCs go to very expense independent schools and you say you are happy with their education, so I really don't see what the problem is.

I haven't accused you of sour grapes before, but since you used it yourself in the post I responded to, I quoted it back at you. I have criticised your inaccurate statements (again without any apparent actual direct knowledge and merely regurgitating 'common knowledge' which is in fact wrong) on a state comprehensive in Exeter which I know quite well due to having friends with children there and friends who work there.

duchesse · 03/02/2011 15:30

sigma- actually, that piece of knowledge was first mentioned to me by a girl doing the IB at Exeter College who was a star CGS pupil until yr 11. I then asked a lot of other people about it, quite a few of whom have had children there, and the word is that they "hide" some of the less competitive pupils by entering them as external candidates.

As regards, St Peter's, I too have friends with children there how were honest enough to explain how their children got in (from quite some way away- 10 miles).

Asteria · 03/02/2011 15:53

My dyslexic brothers and myself all went to Public School (I was at a local Convent and my brothers went to Ampleforth) - both my brothers went in with horrendous abilities (one had the reading age of a 5 year old at 13) and came out with fab a-levels and their first choice places for university. My younger sister on the other hand chose the local Grammar school (she is a very keen rider and wanted to be able to hunt/event at weekends). She is in the top few percent in the country so far as grades and general academic brilliance is concerned (A stars in all GCSE's and A-level English, French, Art, History, RE and Critical Thinking) and was expected to sail through her entrance for Oxbridge. She didn't get in because Oxford and her Grammar "didn't have a good relationship". Her school has let her down enormously (not least because they advised her to include her application for Oxbridge in her personal statement - which immediatly gets other uni's backs up) and she has had to have a gap year to try and get into university the second time around.

If money were no object then I would be sending my DS to Public School, as it is I am applying for the charitable places they offer so fingers crossed he will get in.

Feegle · 03/02/2011 15:55

Wow I have never heard anything negative about either of those schools. Everyone that I know has had a positive experience of them.

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 16:59

@duchesse So you believe gossip from someone who has left a school and clearly has an axe to grind?

Re St Peter's - yes a few people go to the school from far away. When my DS goes there (hopefully) next year he will be travelling from the other side of the city so certainly not in geographical catchment - but that is because the criteria is church attendance. It is not being 'middle class' or being a high SATs achiever which is what you claimed in the other thread. Either your friends are regular church goers in which case their DCs are entitled to go to the school or they aren't and they either lied or got very lucky. If you have friends who are the sort of people who would lie to get their DCs into a school that then that is certainly not something to criticise the school about.

Ultimately, you can't buy your way into St Peters either through coaching or through house purchase. You can probably lie your way in, if you put a gigantic amount of effort in, but that isn't the school's fault.

My main gripe with some of your posts however is the way you purport to be an expert on so many schools in Devon on the basis of, basically, gossip. And negative gossip at that. It's a real shame.

Xenia · 03/02/2011 17:04

Does Devon have any good schools - any in the top 20 say for A level results? They are mostly in the SE which is fascinating. Why should that be?

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 17:14

@feegle yeah - We are delighted with CGS for our DD, she is so happy there and is clearly in the right place for her. Hopefully DS will get into St Peters, (he didn't do the 11+, had no interest and positively blanched at the thought of going to a different school than his mates all of whom will go to St Peters we assume (church primary, normally all the kids go to St Peters)). All the many people I know with kids there (basically most families and several teachers from the primary school have children who are either there still or who went there) are really happy too.

I also know people who are happy with the Maynard, Exeter School, West Exe and both Torquay Grammars. Perhaps I just know a lot of very positive people!

In fact the only people I know who have been unhappy with a school were parents who had a DD at the Maynard and chose to send her to Exeter College for A levels instead of stay on there. Their subsequent DCs have gone to other schools so I guess they really weren't happy with the Maynard but I know others who love it.

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 17:14

@Xenia Colyton Grammar. Heard of that?

seeker · 03/02/2011 17:22

No. People are brighter in the SE. I think it's something to do with the Norman Conquest.

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 17:29

@seeker Could be the water. I grew up in London and the water was very very hard. Down here in the south west it's so soft frankly it's barely water. Grin

pawsnclaws · 03/02/2011 17:35

Hmm, not sure - my oldest two are at an independent at the moment, to be honest the overwhelming factor for us is likely to be financial so I would find it hard to divorce that from anything else.

I can say however that at ds1 and ds2's old prep school there were quite a few boys every year who tried and failed to get into the local selective state school, who then went on to gain entry to pretty high-flying independents like Habs and St Albans. Make of that what you will.

Feegle · 03/02/2011 17:40

Grin at seeker. thetasimamum I must know lots of positive people as well.

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 17:43

@Feegle Well, you have to be really don't you. When you think about the soft water rotting our brains and the prices we have to pay SWW for it. Grin

Feegle · 03/02/2011 17:46

Indeed its about ten quid a glass around here. Grin We were cut off over christmas out in the villages as well. Grin

thetasigmamum · 03/02/2011 17:51

@Feegle really? That's not good. Not when you think what they charge. There were several burst pipes in our road but the service wasn't interrupted, AFAIA. The joys of living in the city.