Binge eaters accountability thread

[LucyLatimer]

A thread to check in and say how we are feeling with no judgment. Taking one day at a time.

Welcome Breathmiller, you sound amazing to have come so far. You are right it's never about food. Welcome on board. 🙂

Thanks bustergonad. Knowing* *I had posted here has made me more aware of what I'm eating and how I feel when I'm eating. Am i full? Satisfied? Am I enjoying every bit?

I'm finding this thread really helpful, it's like writing it on here makes me feel so much more at ease with it. Knowing everyone understands what I'm talking about. If I was to say what I say on here, my husband would think I was bonkers, and he understands mental health, but to say you don't want to be fat but cannot stop eating is such a, weird thing. I bought my husband a big family size bag of swizzlers sweets (from our son) and I had 3 things from it, I was about to unwrap a 4th and I though.... I'm just eating this for the sake of it. I did have a Starbucks cake today but it definitely wasn't a binge. I had a beef wrap and houmous for lunch with 1/2 packet of crops and then the cake after. No binging and no thoughts of binging. My book arrived today. I'll start it tomorrow. My mind is so less busy with thoughts of food. I actually feel less bloated. Not slimming. I'm not focusing on weight. Just less full of junk. Less weighted down with crap.

Sorry about the typos, I need a new phone screen but can't seem to find one for less than £70! Lol. My phone isn't even worth that! 😂

I squeezed in an extra pancake today that I didn’t need and now I’m suffering as I think my stomach has shrunk from not binging and over eating for the past 2 weeks 🥲

a blessing and a curse!

Remember that feeling so next time you feel like eating too much you can remind yourself of why it's not worth it.

I'm aiming to only eat around other people, or at least for other people to see me take stuff to eat, as I realised for me it's the secrecy that allows the binging.

Oh yes the secrecy!
You know how things like cream cakes and slices of cheese come in packs of 2? Well I will buy those and eat both secretly in my car even though I don't want 2, they never sell them singly!

I was thinking about that yesterday @cheeseisthebest when waking around the garden centre. Loads of really yummy looking cakes and biscuits but I couldn’t buy any as I’d eat the whole pack. Why can’t they sell stuff as a single too? Just one small cake portion or just one biscuit.

I hear you on the multi packs of things. We went for a picnic today and a walk. I bought a single bag of crisps, not a giant family pack nor a 6 pack. Just a single bag of crisps from the sandwich bit of the supermarket. I was actually too full after my picnic lunch so i didn't have them then. Later on we were sitting out in the garden and I thought id enjoy them then, so I did. I got the rest of my pepsi max and sat in the sun and really enjoyed my one pack of crisps and glass of pepsi. I obviously didn't need another 5 packets but I could have eaten them had they been there. It has oftened felt like a wasts of money to spend so much on one single bag of crisps when i could get a giant share back for not much more. But it's worth it to have a small treat bag of crisps and not be bloated and full. I do think one of the issues these days is multi bags and packets of everything.

We also decided to eat dinner later to see if that helps with our evening binging. Because I had had the crisps I wasn't starving so I had a normal and enjoyable portion of a delicious dinner that my son made.

One of my issues is stopping eating after dinner but I managed it tonight. I had some yoghurt and berries for afters but i was genuinely full so i may have it for supper.

Loving this thread.

The secrecy is a huge thing, I'm a stay at home mum with my son at school. I have all day to eat without anyone knowing. It's soooo hard. I did buy a normal packet of crisps and a large today. My son had the small and I had a very small portion of the large, So there's still enough for 2 for lunch tomorrow. I didn't go back for more. They didn't have the hold on me like they would if I was thinking.... "The diet starts tomorrow" the diet will NEVER start again.

I also got my book today, reading a bit of it. Had an OK day food wise, but then this evening DH was on about doing a 48 hr fast and it being good for you and feeling boated and 'horrible' if he eats 3 meals a day.I nearly swung back into trying fasting etc, (even though it makes me feel awful) I just was quite non-commital. Said something about we need energy to keep us going. And let it go.

It's up to him what he does. I do find in his family, maybe it is genetic or something but they all have quite disordered patterns around eating and being around it doesn't help me any.

My husband keeps going on about how much weight he's lost and how he's doing do well at the gym. It doesn't help!

My husband needs to gain some weight so I joked that we could pretend we’re on supersize vs super skinny if you guys remember that? But actually I think it wouldn’t be such a bad thing 🤣

Yes but then you would be on a restricted diet again and back to square one! Diets don't work and cause binge eating!

I've just started my book and I'm definitely not going to use a journal as that is too much like dieting! Just thinking about it makes me anxious!

I've actually got an anxiety stomach ache today, I'm trying to sort out our visas for the next country, my husband was a bit mean to me this morning and I'm worrying about our flights next week (will we be on them or won't we???) it isn't good for my food issues but I'm going spend the day reading.

It becomes our go-to place for dealing with stress, doesn't it? My son is bipolar and I have to really stay strong at not letting his mental health episodes cause me to fast/binge as a form of self punishment.

Yes, I'm always stressing out about things, my son has autism and he can be so moody and always wants to talk about his stuff. I haven't always got the patience but if I cut him off he gets really upset. EG he's talking about cats, the phone rings, it's really important. He gets upset. Or I'm in the middle of buying flights online, I'm waiting for the visa card OTP, I move away to get near the window to receive my OTP (crap phone service). He gets pissed off that I'm not listening to him. Sometimes I feel like f**King raging my head off. 😂🤷‍♀️

Family life can be stressful can't it. Our cute little cockatiel has sadly died suddenly after being ill over the weekend and DS (17) is home today. Feels very quiet without him. DS is resitting his A level mocks this week as well :(

Our emotions can be so linked with eating I agree. It's hard...I guess this was what writing the diary is about? I have seen that written in another book somewhere but think it's not for me atm either.

Writing in a journal is too much for me, the Times I've made food journals. It's so depressing. I just can't bring myself to do it. I'm off now in a mad hunt to get passport photos. That will be another downer seeing my mug looking back at me from the truth that is a passport photo! 😂😬

oranges so sorry to hear your cockatiel has died.

I do keep a journal and have found it useful. It's more a general journal and i can bleurgh all my thoughts out in it. I've moved to an online one and I find i commit to it more.

I also have a daily note on my phone. It has a list of things to do and part of it is my 5 a day , my 8glasses of water and my breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, snack. It helps to keep me...i don't know...safe. and bizarrely on a binge eating thread , it reminds me to keep eating. Regularly. The key for me definitely lies in my body trusting that when i finish a meal or a snack that it won't be forever until I eat again. That's what the diet mentality has given me. Feast or famine. I don't always manage all of these, especially the snacks (i didn't this morning for instance as I was busy, had had a late breakfast and wasn't hungry) but it's a safe guide for me. It also helps to break it down and i find it easier to eat healthily and intuitively in each meal/snack. I've never been very good at routine but this does help, for me anyway.

I'm sorry about your cocketiel too. It's so sad when a family pet dies. 😔

Thanks, I'm quite missing him it's odd how a bird can be such a friend in a way. DS has the day off school.

Keeping up the regular eating here, we have a stash of binge-able food which oddly, MIL brings round every weekend had a little craving for it (mid afternoons this seems to happen) but not too bad.

Having a read of the book as well at the same time as henna-ing hair...

We’re getting a takeaway tonight which is going to be a real test of strength! Wish me luck, I’m going to need it!