#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 12

[ButtonMooooon]

New thread, hope you don't mind I started a new one Kwick

Oh @ButtonMooooon I'm so sorry to hear that. It must be so demoralising. And I can imagine that you're feeling quite alone without your DH being with you at the appointments.

Why can't he come with you? And do you mind me asking why your clinic is so far away? Is there any option to move to one closer or are things too far down the line now?

Sending hugs x

Awww sorry to hear that. Hopefully a successful resolution will happen soon enough 😚 x

So Sorry button - hope you can rest up this weekend a bit as the long journey must be really tough too.

We've had our first appt at the clinic and got our surgical sperm retrieval booked in a months time in mid November so we are just relieved we'll know one way or the other by then, it's just such a relief we will know for certain one way or the other and to have a timescale for that now.

Can I stick my head round to say hello?

Basically my husband and I have been trying for over two years.

After numerous teats found out the only option for us is ivf with sperm donation.

I have taken time and and now trying to loose weight before the deadline of May!

I haven’t been able to previously due to the fact I had to get my mental health in a better place. Which I have done!

We want to go forward with ivf but in my head I only want to try one cycle. I am afraid of trying more.

Welcome @Babipotjam
Well done with the weight loss and mental health side of things - the whole process of infertility is so tough but sounds like you are moving forward which is really positive!
Do you know when you'll be able to try your ivf cycle? Are you through nhs?

Hycosy is booked for Wednesday! They made rather a fuss about the fact that I'll be attending (and going home) on my own, but I've managed to convince them it's all fine - they're happy to go ahead as long as someone CAN be called in an emergency. 😕

I completely understand why this will be important when I come to have IVF - but what about the IUI cycle?

@Laura Once I have lost the weight we will then be put on waiting list.
I’m in a better place so I can crack on and face the things that this horrible road will throw at us.

@AnotherGin for my iuis in both clinics I've used I've gone on my own.

What are people's thoughts about dying hair in tww? Googling seems to bring up mixed response and my roots are awful...

I should add I would probably avoid doing it in first trimester as important organs being developed but I read that egg wouldn't have attached to enough blood vessels in tww to absorb anything that may go in blood system

I wouldn't think twice about it in the TWW

Thanks @OneMoreWish

In terms of hair dying, I'd understood it was fine until the placenta kicks in - so absolutely fine in the TWW.

If I'm honest I was hesitant to dye my hair, but I lost the baby anyway - hair dyeing (or lack of!) was definitely unrelated.

Thanks ladies think I will go ahead with appointment x

@OneMoreWish Enjoy!

Oh my Lord I've been up and down with this tww. Second go at iui 13 days ago ( so 12dpo today)

Started testing on 7dpo as it was my birthday and I thought it would be lovely if I was one of those people that got a faint line early doors. Obvs bfn.

8dpo - tested and looked like a hint of a line could be seen especially at top and bottom of where line should be - got excited.

9dpo fmu - tested and bfn but no spotting like last month before period started so good sign.
10dpo fmu tested and bfn. Still no spotting so was feeling positive although scared every time I wiped.

But 2:30pm spotting started - gutted . Then seemed to stop, started to get hopeful but a bit more just after 8pm

11dpo fmu tested and bfn. About an hour later but more spotting. Checking throughout day and mostly nothing occasionally stated as thought saw something. Evening spotting. Came to bed gutted again that I had got my hopes up again. All night felt sad going asleep.

12dpo no frer left. Did ic with fmu and bfn. Slight brown when wiped so put sanitary towel on and thought sod it I will get my hair down today.

Lots of bleach on hair and focus on treating myself while mentally trying to figure out if can somehow afford another go. Went toilet twice and nothing there.

Went home and tested and there is a faint line... im really hoping this is real as I can't take this up and down of hope and despondency.

Will test with frer tomorrow with fmu at 13dpo

Really hoping I will report back with good news xxx

Oh @OneMoreWish what a rollercoaster. Please let us know how you get on tomorrow, I have everything crossed for you!

We had our nurse appointment today to go through all the legal forms ahead of egg donor ivf. Counselling next week and then we are officially waiting for a match! Could even be this side of Christmas.

I felt really upset after the appointment, I'm not really sure why. Partly because shit just got real I guess. But also the nurse (although she was lovely) was really questioning whether we were ok with going straight to donor eggs. She made me feel like it was an odd decision even though DH and I are both in total agreement over it. I had a little cry when I got to my car. 😢

Thanks @SallyA1. DH has just got home from work and I got really upset again. I think another reason why I got upset is on the form it said "infertility cause". I asked what I should write and she said "ovarian failure". It's ridiculous because I know that's what it is, it's not new news, and the solution to that is already in motion. But it still made me feel really sad hearing it put so clinically. And I feel silly for feeling sad!!
I'm a bit all over the place tonight as you can tell 🙈

@OneMoreWish really everything crossed for you.
@jemimafuddleduck it's such a rollercoaster of emotions and it's completely understandable to feel like that, as it can make you feel so sad sometimes. I'm exactly the same one minute I feel okay and the next I'm completely not okay and it might just be something quite small that suddenly tips the balance or appointments that have brought everything to the surface. You are doing what is right for you and no-one can argue with that xx

@jemimafuddleduck I don't think it's surprising at all that you're feeling emotional - this whole process is horrid, and it doesn't matter that you know what the problem is, seeing it put so clinically is painful.

Just had my hycosy. In a way it wasn't as bad as I was expecting, but it brought back too many memories of the miscarriage surgery so I'm glad it's finished. Looks like I had a blockage on one side but the pressure of the dye being forced through cleared it, so it's all good for a cycle of IUI.

I'm still unsure whether or not to do 3 cycles or a single one before moving to IVF - I don't want to waste any time as my fertility apparently isn't great and I want my savings to go as far as possible... I need a crystal ball.

@OneMoreWish Thinking of you. X

Hi Silly,
DW and I are in the tww. Iui completed last week so trying to stay level headed! Hope all goes well with your donor selection.