TTC - First time home insemination

[libbyidk]

First time posting so bare with me.

We are in a same sex relationship, and I just thought i'd share our story so far to see if anyone else is going through the same or has any advice/tips for myself and my partner.

We first went to a private clinic, and payed hundreds for scans, blood tests, screening etc, only to be told my partner couldn't donate her eggs (we were counting on this as it lowers the price by about 3-4000 pounds!), we were then told we should try IUI at the clinic which would cost us about 2-3000 pounds. We went home after this appointment and had a chat, we decided to try home insemination first, and if it doesn't work after 2 times, we will then go back to the clinic, but I wasn't finding them very helpful, and they were quite rude to us!

We searched online for sperm banks and came across cryos in denmark. We researched all the legal complications and know all about it, and decided as so many people do try this, we were going to as well. We ordered our anonymous washed donor sperm (MOT20) 2 vials (all we could afford.)

It arrived on tuesday (it lasts for 7 days in a nitro tank), and I started using the clear blue dual hormone predictor kit. I also use a fertility app and have been vaguely monitoring my cervical mucas. I tested negative from monday (the start of my fertility window) until yesterday (friday) i went straight from negative to peak on the clear blue monitor! I researched this to make sure it was right and I saw that a lot of people go straight from low to peak, especially if they missed their surge (which i may have done). The app also said I was due to have peak fertility friday and saturday, so i'm confident in the test and we decided to inseminate one vial on friday at 6pm (8 hours after my positive result) and we inseminated again on sunday at 6am. Just before I had the insemination, I was getting pretty bad cramps and I think ovulation may have started, although i'm not 100%. I got some cramp after inseminating too.

Frozen sperm lives in the body for 12-24 hours (apparantly) but some swimmers can last longer. So we inseminated at 6pm which will cover me (hopefully) until 6pm saturday, whilst also inseminating at 6am saturday which would cover me until 6am (hopefully) sunday. We sat and talked constantly about the timing but we just decided to go for it, as like everybody says, even if the timing is perfectly right and your CM is perfect, there is still only a 10-20% chance of conception.

I'm just praying my clearblue test was correct and my peak is friday and saturday like it shows. (My app also shows this like i said). I have a 29 day cycle and it's hardly EVER irregular, so I think we've done all what we should have.

Now we're onto our two week wait which i'm not looking forward to! Like I keep saying to myself, it is our first time trying and we could have done a number of things wrong. It is just trial and error from here on out! If anyone else wants to share their story about home insemination with frozen sperm, using clearblue monitors / success stories, i would really appreciate that!

Thanks @LanieM87 how are you feeling? x

I’m ok thanks! @Waiting2BAMummy Trying not to symptom spot but I had crazy nausea yesterday and a little spotting today. But other then that I’ve felt the same as I always do! AF is due on Saturday.

Fingers crossed for you @LanieM87

Met my new donor he is quite socially awkward but seems like a real genuine guy. He is happy to come over the days that I need and will come to my flat so it's not going to be costing hundreds of pounds every month. He is also 16 years younger than my previous donor so fingers crossed for next month.

I'm going to have a few days off of my diet plan, not taking the Mickey, just enjoying the things I fancy then back onto it on Sunday ready for my first insemination next Saturday.

Thanks for asking, @Waiting2BAMummy. I'm ok. A bit crampy and producing enough CM to raise the Titanic (sorry!) but I still don't believe it's actually happening. I need the FR to arrive so I can see a good strong line.

If it is true then the next hurdle is telling my mother, who will be far from pleased. Hey ho, perhaps in ten years or so!

Glad your new donor seems lovely. Has he done it before? I hope you're succesful with the lively young sperm! So sorry to hear AF is on her way, I really hoped we might go through this together.

I've been off my diet plan for far too long. Weighed myself this morning and almost fainted with the shock. Am hoping LCHF is fine for pregnancy. It had better be!

Yes he's done it before 3 times have been successful and a couple of times were not.

He has agreed to help for 6 months and I've already tried for 5 cycles so hopefully that will be long enough. If I catch next month I won't be far behind you and you can warn me of all the wonderful things I have to look forward to @TimeIhadaNameChange.

From what I have read the increase in CM is what ultimately forms the mucus plug to help prevent infection.

Can't wait to see your strong line on the FR - next stop clear blue digital!!

I'm not telling my mother we barely have anything to with each other as it is and frankly I don't want her negative, toxic attitude around my child. Whatever you mum says this is your life and, parent or not, she has no right to tell you how to live it.

Hi Ladies, I’ve been off the page for a little while and not receiving notifications!
@TimeIhadaNameChange keep us posted with your good news, it’s lovely to have something to celebrate! Massively keeping my fingers crossed and waiting for the next picture positive!
@Waiting2BAMummy I’m sorry about your Mum, and please to hear you’ve found a new donor. Fingers crossed it’s your time too!
@LanieM87 I will be hoping that AF doesn’t arrive for you!

Have I missed anything else?
Hope everything is good with all x

@Freezerbump hope everything went well with your move and delivery. Weren’t you waiting for an op too? X

Hiya! Well, what a week, moving, awol cat captured from 12ft wall from ladder (well done me) and knee op... all just calming down and insem tomorrow once the adrenaline leaves the system I think!
Phew!

Sounds like you're all caught up on our shenanigans @LouMill how are things with you?

You don't do things by halves do you @Freezerbump? Kudos to you for rescuing the cat! Hope your knee is recovering well and good luck for tomorrow. Have everything crossed for you x

Looks like I’m out this month, AF looks to making its arrival, thought it was a bit early, but I’m on CD29 and it usually shows between now and CD31. Natural cycles moved it out as I ovulated late. So it means I’ve only had a 9 day LP.
Bit disappointed of course, but not wholly unexpected.
Glad you’re meeting with your new donor went well @Waiting2BAMummy sounds like you’ve got a great plan in place!
Aww @TimeIhadaNameChange sounds like you’re symptoms are really picking up! It’s a very exciting time! Don’t let your mother put a dampener on it!

I've never used any fertility app @LanieM87 but from things I have read they are much less reliable than using OPK's and temping etc. Ultimately they are just an algorithm that makes educated guesses about your cycles based on your data. However, they can only guess based on the most common outcome with your data. Since every woman, and cycle, is different they're not always going to be accurate.

I'm sorry that AF is getting you this month fingers crossed for you for your next cycle x

@LouMill just seen one of your previous post and it seems like we are in a very similar position. If we go down the ivf route me and my partner would have to do icsi which is crazy expensive. We were looking at using sellmerdiers just to give us more chances.
Are you still thinking if ordering from them or have you ordered from them?

What a week that was, @Freezerbump - glad you managed to retrieve the cat eventually, poor love! Was he unsettled by the moving, or just fancied a bit of an adventure?

@LanieM87 - do you use OPKs as well? I've been using the Femometer app (similar to NC) together with OPKs and although, in general, it does seem to show a pattern I'm not altogether convinced by it. One month it moved ovulation from (roughly) CD14 to CD9, on CD14 which caused me no end of stress, but then when AF showed it decided ovulation had occured on CD 14 after all (which is what the OPKs had suggested in the first place!). The one thing it does seem to get right is a gradual temp drop the days before AF appears. This month there was no drop until day 28, but then it's been on the up ever since, which is another sign I'm taking positively!

I really hope your new donor works for you, @Waiting2BAMummy! How lovely that you've got a six month commitment from him. Surely that should work? Is he good looking??????????

@LouMill - thanks for letting me stay here!!!! I have wandered onto a couple of pregnancy threads but I don't know anyone there and feel friendless!!!!!

I'll have to tell my mother at some point. I do want to tell her sooner rather than later, but I'll never forget her telling me, years ago, "You're lucky, if you fall pregnant you can just have an abortion" and I really don't want that to be her reaction now. She thinks I should be(am???) still a virgin as I'm not married, and the whole situation with me and DP is so bizarre that me being pregnant will come as a huge shock to her. Plus we're not financially that secure, and he's not the first bloke you'd want to impregnate your daughter (however he managed it) so I really can't see the news going down well at all. At least his family, who knew the plans anyway, will be happy!

@TimeIhadaNameChange OMG have I missed something?? Are congrats in order??

@Freezerbump - tentative congrats, maybe! I've been having positive pregnancy tests since last Thursday but I haven't had a nice clear line yet so I refuse to believe 100% that it's worked. I'm now CD 30, 16dpo and my temp is still up (and rising) so it's a possibility. Maybe. (Will find out for sure after blood test next week - eeeeek!)

Oh my goodness! How exciting! Keeping everything crossed for you :)

I'm having a bit of a mare, seems that surgery has brought on a v early period and was going to insem tonight :/

I'm thinking I'll just leave it in the tank for another week and give it a go :/ what a pickle!

Thanks, @Freezerbump!

You really are having a mare, though, aren't you? Don't suppose it's an ovulation bleed rather than a period (grasping at straws here, I know!), cos if it is inseminating tonight would be perfect. If it really is an early period can you get hold of any more dry ice from somewhere?

Thanks @Waiting2BAMummy yes I use OPKs and I temp via natural cycles @TimeIhadaNameChange
I’ve found natural cycles to be somewhat accurate compared to the other apps I have tried. But I do think that’s because NC has my temps. I’ve had a fairly consistent 11 day luteal phase which is why AF caught me by surprise after only 9days.
Never mind. Onto the next month! Think I’m gonna try frozen and then use my gap in August to try and find another donor if next month is unsuccessful.

Sounds like you’re having a mare @Freezerbump ! How long does the tanks last?

Well... it seems to have stopped now....
I don't think I've had ov bleeding before but maybe it's a one off ?

Should only last until tomorrow really but as I haven't opened it I might get away with another day or so..

How long do you reckon I should give the random bleeding fairy to steer clear..

Absolutely no idea, @Freezerbump, sorry! Have you tried an OPK?

@TimeIhadaNameChange of course you're allowed to stay. You had better! We've been cycle buddies, you can't go ditching me now!! Next month when I get my BFP (check out my PMA!) we won't be that far apart and you can fill me in on all the scans etc. I'm hoping it will happen in the six months he's committed to, especially seen as I have already tried for five cycles (three if you count the first two that were completely at the wrong time back when I had no idea what I was doing). My new donor isn't good looking but I have found all the good looking one's are the one's who will only do NI.

That's weird @Freezerbump I had a strange bleed this month too but I think I irritated my cervix with the soft cup. If it has stopped now and you are only mid cycle I would assume it's not AF. As @TimeIhadaNameChange said have you tried an OPK?

Womens cycles seem to do all manner of crazy shenanigans once you start trying to conceive @LanieM87 My cycles had always been 28 days+ but since TTC I've had two 25 days cycles.

@Waiting2BAMummy this is very true! I’m pretty sure all my timings were right for insemination, so I’m hoping I’ve just been unlucky, it’s so frustrating to not know what you could do differently! Could you imagine if we could all get feedback?! 😂

I would welcome the feedback @LanieM87! If my body would just tell me what I was doing wrong I could change it!!

How are you doing, @Waiting2BAMummy? Do I presume the witch made an appearance this week?

Don't worry, I won't be ditching you! I'll hang around here and annoy you all instead - you'll soon be wishing you'd got rid of me!

I'm getting a couple of FRER delivered today (was going to be next Tues). The red line ones are supposed to be better than the blue, and the FR are apparently one of the best on the market. Since I'm now 5 days late, and they are good from a few days before, and can be used at any time of the day (though obv morning is better) I'm going to use one this evening and hope I get a decent line. DP will be going away from tonight for a month, so it would be nice to be able to show him a definitive line before he goes.

How's everybody else doing? Are you all roasting in the sunshine?

Yes, the witch arrived @TimeIhadaNameChange really not surprised. Due to try again next weekend so fingers crossed.

Can't wait to see your bright pink line! Are you getting more convinced now as the days pass with a visit from the witch? How are you feeling?