TTC - First time home insemination

[libbyidk]

First time posting so bare with me.

We are in a same sex relationship, and I just thought i'd share our story so far to see if anyone else is going through the same or has any advice/tips for myself and my partner.

We first went to a private clinic, and payed hundreds for scans, blood tests, screening etc, only to be told my partner couldn't donate her eggs (we were counting on this as it lowers the price by about 3-4000 pounds!), we were then told we should try IUI at the clinic which would cost us about 2-3000 pounds. We went home after this appointment and had a chat, we decided to try home insemination first, and if it doesn't work after 2 times, we will then go back to the clinic, but I wasn't finding them very helpful, and they were quite rude to us!

We searched online for sperm banks and came across cryos in denmark. We researched all the legal complications and know all about it, and decided as so many people do try this, we were going to as well. We ordered our anonymous washed donor sperm (MOT20) 2 vials (all we could afford.)

It arrived on tuesday (it lasts for 7 days in a nitro tank), and I started using the clear blue dual hormone predictor kit. I also use a fertility app and have been vaguely monitoring my cervical mucas. I tested negative from monday (the start of my fertility window) until yesterday (friday) i went straight from negative to peak on the clear blue monitor! I researched this to make sure it was right and I saw that a lot of people go straight from low to peak, especially if they missed their surge (which i may have done). The app also said I was due to have peak fertility friday and saturday, so i'm confident in the test and we decided to inseminate one vial on friday at 6pm (8 hours after my positive result) and we inseminated again on sunday at 6am. Just before I had the insemination, I was getting pretty bad cramps and I think ovulation may have started, although i'm not 100%. I got some cramp after inseminating too.

Frozen sperm lives in the body for 12-24 hours (apparantly) but some swimmers can last longer. So we inseminated at 6pm which will cover me (hopefully) until 6pm saturday, whilst also inseminating at 6am saturday which would cover me until 6am (hopefully) sunday. We sat and talked constantly about the timing but we just decided to go for it, as like everybody says, even if the timing is perfectly right and your CM is perfect, there is still only a 10-20% chance of conception.

I'm just praying my clearblue test was correct and my peak is friday and saturday like it shows. (My app also shows this like i said). I have a 29 day cycle and it's hardly EVER irregular, so I think we've done all what we should have.

Now we're onto our two week wait which i'm not looking forward to! Like I keep saying to myself, it is our first time trying and we could have done a number of things wrong. It is just trial and error from here on out! If anyone else wants to share their story about home insemination with frozen sperm, using clearblue monitors / success stories, i would really appreciate that!

@Freezerbump hunger is another BFP sign #JustSayin' x

@Waiting2BAMummy

There's an instruction video on the website I linked to. Someone recommended practising with preseed first. And then doing that on the day. Insert a cup with preseed to warm up. Then remove and swap over with the cup with the sample in.

Well got impatient after a rubbish nights sleep and bfn this morning so I think I'm out, just waiting for af to turn up now 🙄

I'm sorry to hear that, Freezerbump.

Waiting2BAMummy - you just squeeze it and insert. It almost feels the opposite to a Cup which goes in like a 'V' as it were, as the softcup goes in like a / and then sits around the cervix, as it were. I just used them post insemination rather than to insert.

I'm not convinced about being able to feel fertilisation. At least with ovulation, whilst it's the movement of a single cell it does go through a membrane that's attached to you, whilst fertilisation occurs when the egg is free flowing. Unless there are chemical receptors along the fallopian tube which can pick up the chemical changes. Who knows?

One more shot tonight then it's fingers crossed for me!

How many dpo are you @Freezerbump? Still got everything crossed.

10dpo today, I have a 26 day cycle and ov late so af should arrive today, longest cycle is 31 so we'll see when she shows

@Freezerbump you've done so well!!! Fingers crossed!!

My temps have started to drop so Expectinf af tomorow

@Dosmamas ughhhh I just want it over now so I can reset... still feel a bit queasy and sweaty... must be a bug, also, along with those delights, also feel unexpectedly frisky IYKWIM... not symptoms you would expect to team up!

I'll join you on the strange symptoms, and this is supposed to be DO for me. I keep feeling heaving in my lower, like I occassionally do at the start of my period. Very, very strange.

It's going to be a very long and slow two weeks. I did buy a FR test this morning, though, so will probably try testing a week on Sat. If I've not driven myself up the blinking wall by then!

I reckon my symptoms are due to the Pregnacare I've been taking. Makes sense, as I've only been taking them a few days (was taking Seven Seas folic acid previously) which coincides with the symptoms, and there are comments about side effects online.

@TimeIhadaNameChange good luck with your wait lovely, make sure to obsessively update us :)

.....patiently sitting waiting for obsessive updates.....

I won't have my own 2 week wait this month so going to piggyback on all of your obsessiveness!!

Much love and baby dust to all x

Lol @Freezerbump I never feel frisky the day before, but at the end of AF. Watch out 😂. 13dpo, waiting for AF currently, did a test this afternoon again and BFN. feel so much calmer I don't have to symptom spot anymore. Just want the witch hurry up and start so I can get to my FW. Hopefully now I have stopped Agnus castes my FW will go back to day 17 giving my egg longer to mature.

@Dosmamas what's Angus castes? I had 2 naps on the sofa and just contemplating going to bed with a book.... rock and roll..

Back to work tomorrow having just about turned myself round from nights.

How many days over your expected af date are you? Are you regular?

Still sweaty if I move, hoovering was a joy earlier, have also been grazing, and napping, like when your hungover.. but without the fun bit pre hangover...

Boobs still sensitive but nips rather than the whole boob exploding which is usually what happens.

I'm not sure if I usually feel this knackered pre af... day of sure... no sign of her yet... googled cervix positions earlier and had a prod about.. buggered if I can feel anything up there no idea how these ladies do it!

It's so magical being a lady isn't it 🙄

Haha Freezer.

I was so excited when I found my cervix for the first time last week. I can definitely report that it is significantly lower now AF is here. High good for pregnancy. Low bad. So if you can't easily find it, then that's a good sign.

@bitheby hmmmm maybe I've just got short fingers ... how far up is yours at af time? (Sorry to ask such a weird question... just wondering how far up I should be poking before hitting something!)

Hahahahaha. I've never been asked that, not even by an intimate partner.

So, to find it, I squatted in the shower and used my longest finger. I had to push my finger in and towards my back and found it at pretty much the full length of my finger.

Now I'd say it's about a half inch lower so I don't have to stretch.

And I've got AF at the moment.

Someone on YouTube (yes I watched a YouTube video on how to feel your cervix) said it feels like the tip of your nose behind pursed lips.

@bitheby ☺️ # awks..... Thankyou :) might have another go.... thank god for this group.. not the sort of thing you can bring up over tea and biccies at work is it :/

@Freezerbump I took Agnes Castus for PMS. It was out of control. You can use it to regulate cycles aswell (I didn't need that I was so regular) so it's messed my cycle up trying to help lol. Can 100% say it was amazing for my PMS. I sailed through it last month. This is so exciting, your symptoms are making me think something's going on there!!

I found my cervix for the first time ever last week too, you'll definitely know if you touch it, it's an odd sensation not unpleasant or unfamiliar but yeah it has its own feeling lol! and really does feel like a nose/chin/lips depending on what it's doing. Mine is still out of reach which I'm suprised by, and was the reason I tested this afternoon, was too high to reach properly and when I stopped checking I noticed creamy CM so I got a wave of hope.

Not past AF yet, it's due tomorow and then I will have finished the TWW. I have a feeling it's going to be late though. Just because my whole cycle has been a mess.

@TimeIhadaNameChange Pregnacare gave my partner her first ever 45 day cycle just to be warned. We were dubious it was strong enough to do anything but low and behold, first month of taking it - 45 day cycle. Awful. Now we are just taking folic acid, iron and vit d.

Can I ask something weird. When we get our donors sample it's only maximum 5 minutes after he has ejaculated and every time we get it, it's already liquefied. I didn't realise ejaculate "jellied" when it came out then liquified after 15 or so minutes. I have never been with a guy so I have no clue what it's like, my partner who is bi can't honestly remember. I only ask because other TTC groups have had debates about waiting for it to liquefy for 15-20 minutes before insem and others say put it straight in there. Where as ours has always been really thin 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️ next insem I am taking a picture! For comparison!

@Dosmamas I do feel a bit peculiar but I'm not sure if I've just talked myself in to it or not... feel queasy but have also grazed on a random selection of foods today from cashews to tuna to chocolate so not entirely surprised that's causing a swirl in the tummy zone.,.😂

Re semen, it's kind of pale and just holds its shape when it comes out... think thin wallpaper paste?! I've never waited to see what happens after but it liquifies after 10-20 mins so you can suck it up a syringe.

The Cryos straws are a very thin liquid so I guess that's what you're looking for ideally.

Tested with a bog standard boots cheapie, maybe I should try a different one if nothing happens in next couple of days, what do you use?

@Freezerbump we always have one FRER per cycle otherwise I use very cheap internet HCG strips with 10miul/ml.

I read a post from someone who had successfully achieved pregnancy and she was insrminating practically as soon as her donor had ejaculated but have also read stories of people who waited 10 minutes or so, so I don't think it matters either way.

@Dosmamas hmmmm maybe I should get another one... think the one I used was 25 or 50....

Re timing for sperm, as long as the container has no water in it and as air free as poss I wouldn't worry, as long as he has good motility semen can survive for up to 7days in a happy lady environment :)

Just keep it body temp and get it in within 30 mins ideally I reckon