Anyone so put off by marriage and living with a man that they plan on remaining single for the rest of their lives?!

[BlueTeaCups]

Planning on leaving DH after a toxic marriage where I know we would be both much better off in the long run.

The thought of meeting and sharing my life/living with another man fills me with horror!

Has anyone got divorced with no plans on basically EVER dating again? Are you much happier? I am used to living with someone and coming home after work chatting about my day, if anything goes wrong in the house it’s not just up to me and I do like having someone to share a meal with and watch a show together but I can’t imagine ever doing that again after divorce?

Divorced over 22 years now & have remained single all that time. I have no intention of ever living with or marrying anyone ever again.
I’ve recently met a man completely by chance & he’s perfect for me. He also doesn’t want to live with anyone or get married. We both have adult children. We live a 10 mins drive from each other & he is totally understanding of my need for alone time etc. So far it’s the perfect situation.

Me. I have been single most of my life and at 54 have no interest in dating ever again.

I only had bad experiences with me so I am much happier and freer on my own!

Don’t have to move in with someone, nice to live apart but have good company/ intimacy..
Weekends/ holidays 🤷🏻‍♀️
Shame to go through life without that no matter how great people say single life is !
Is it ??? To not even have that …

I was married to a decent man and then he died. Even though I had a good marriage, I absolutely won't be doing it again, or living with one again.

I Iike men, in fact I'm just back from a lovely weekend away with one, but as a woman with financial independence, I don't know what I'd gain from living with him. This way, I get the good bits of a relationship without the drudgery, which no matter how "good" he is, and how aware of it we are, women always seem to take on.

I still think the nuclear family is the best way to raise DC, but beyond that don't see any benefit to sharing home and finances.

I always say I'm open to something and open to nothing. I think it would be foolish to rule it out completely but at 50 and with a mostly great independent life, it's hard to imagine anything beyond a 'meet for the nice stuff' relationship ever being something I would want. I have a few good men in my life who fulfill many of the company/fun elements, one of whom I occasionally sleep with. Best of both worlds methinks....

I‘m happy in my current relationship with DP, but if for some reason it ended, I don’t think I’d seek another. I like peace and quiet and not having to share a space with someone else. As for dating - perish the thought!

That’s my experience almost exactly - no regrets

As @JeanPaulGagtier said, I don't miss the "daily feeling of pulling someone else through life"... the sheer dead weight of my abusive ex, even on a good day, (and there weren't many) has made me convinced that I never want to risk ending up like that again...I'm relatively newly divorced, and at some point there might be bed friends, there might be a significant other living in their own house, but someone living in my house, with me...no chance...and if I stay feeling like I am now, I'll be very happily single for the rest of my days...

Then why are you?

Been single for 8 years since my divorce. Grown up kids now and a grandchild and absolutely love it. I’m financially independent, have lots of hobbies and friends and my home is exactly how I want it.

I can take or leave sex and without a big need for that, I don’t really see the point of men. They are generally all a bit sex obsessed and so many of them let you down.

I have more in common with women and enjoy my family and friends more. A man wouldn’t add anything to my life so why bother.

I have posted above about why I want to stay single. However I think it's important to show balance. For me the only real downside is the relative financial insecurity. If you loose your job for whatever reason, you are the only financial contributer and so therefore have nothing to fall back on. That said I'm financially much better of then when I was married. Possibly driven by the knowledge and awareness of the above insecurity, I have put much more effort into building myself a financial buffer so that I'm not so vulnerable. I'm on top of my finances in a way I never was when I was married. Not everyone is so lucky though and I feel very privileged to be in that place

I knew at 24 I didn't want another relationship, but was pressured into it by friends and family. That I'd regret it etc. I ended up staying in an emotionally abusive relationship because everyone else thought he was great. I believed I was the problem and should be lucky to have him and accept the crap.

I'm now happily single for 9 years next month.

Confusing.. please don’t, if you don’t want to -is it for financial reasons?

Not through my personal experience, but I grew up with parents who are in an unhappy marriage. I don't know how they still stand it. I knew from when I was quite young that I never wanted to live like that. Was on the fence of living with someone, but I really love having my own space exactly the way I want it and being able to use the toilet and bathroom when it suits me, especially now that I am getting older.

I divorced 2 years ago at the age of 55. I'm not interested one little bit in engaging in any type of relationship. I was married nearly 30 years and feel that is my attempt done. Whilst financially I am likely to be poor in old age, my here and now happiness is much more precious to me.

I will never have a man living under my roof again (unless blood relation) as long as I live. Never ever ever.

I have been single for about 10 years since splitting up from my last partner. I really can't see why I would ever want another partner... I do miss having warmth of a human connection but it comes with so much crap and demands that I can't take it!

The only serious disadvantage I see is financial side - living together with someone halves your bills. Otherwise, being single is a bliss.

I left ex 3 years ago. Spent time alone (just me plus kids) but started dating a year ago.

I am not at the point where I would want to live with a man again, and can imagine that maybe I won’t, but I am open to it.

No. Was married for 30 years. In fact I still am as haven’t got around to divorce yet!
I am always a bit surprised when people ask if I want to date. It just seems so weird that anyone would assume I want to take on another one. I love many men but I don’t want one in my house. Peace please.

I grew up watching my f treat my dm as an unpaid domestic skivvy. He was verbally, emotionally, financially abusive.

I've lived with two men and had a number of other relationships. I have yet to meet a man who wants to be an equal partner or who genuinely cares about anyone except himself.

One put on a good show, his self serving belittling and controlling behaviour started the day after DS was born.

I'll never marry - I'll never be so stupid as to tie myself legally to a man. There is no need, I have a home, a career, a pension. Why would I give up my independence? A marriage could only be to my and my child's detriment.

But that doesn't mean I wouldn't consider another relationship. Friendship and intimacy needn't involve marriage.

A friend asked me a while ago if I had considered dating (been single for 8 years). I asked her what I would gain if I did and she had no answer!
I'm just not interested in having anyone else that needs looking after, totally CBA.

I’m happily married and don’t want him to go anywhere, but I wouldn’t get married again.

I’m surrounded by men. I only have sons, my DH, only brothers, only my dad left, uncles and I work in a very male dominated field. My blood male relations are very mysoginist and think my job is to listen and indulge them. My DH is lovely, but the other men are really high maintenance.

Recently we were introduced to a relatives new BF. He was an arsehole and afterwards I just decided I wasn’t having anything to do with him because I just have no more capacity for another dickhead man.

As Monica said, “I don’t need an actual man. Just some of his best swimmers”.

I’m still married, just, and I know for sure that I would never share a home with a man again.

Me. I think if I ever dated at all now I'd date women. The thought of another man just doesn't do it for me anymore. Despite being straight my whole life. But I'm not looking, I'm happy single.