Seeing my kids just every other weekend

[Happylittlebluebird]

I have decided to drop protracted court preceedings as it is getting us nowhere.

Any other mums out there that just see their kids every other weekend? My boys are 11 and 13.

I am heartbroken but it's the price you pay for leaving an abusive narcissist.

Please be kind as obviously I'm feeling devastated right now as it is.

As horrible as it is, if you choose to rebuild your life and have another child, there is always a chance the existing children prefer to live with their other parent. One of my DD's chooses not to have much to do with her dad because his dp has a child (and she doesn't want to play second fiddle) but is fine with my dp and his adult kids

Oh and @Voomster953 don’t forget recently he new partner also lied about money and debt so there were issues of trust there too.

Op you don't help yourself.

@FeatheredHope

Oh and *@Voomster953* don’t forget recently he new partner also lied about money and debt so there were issues of trust there too.

The poor, poor children.

I’m just so sad

many solutions offered.

Oh no, can’t possibly do that

Absolutely this Uhtred

What is also upsetting that on this thread as well as others there are posters sharing their experiences, in a very heartfelt way & thinking we are diminishing parental alienation or excusing abuse. But we're not. This particular poster has created a narrative that veers between deeply depressing & highly unbelievable and leaves many worried for the DC at the centre of it.

I also remember a lot of threads from this poster.ive no doubt the ex was emotionally abusive etc, but I'm not sure how stable the OP is either - she seems to lurch to extremes when under stress hence the 'i won't see my kids any more' response. She very nearly had quite a late abortion with this baby for much the same reasons 'if my ex is going to be like that I'm going to have to terminate' (paraphrasing obviously) and then when because of 1st wave Covid she did think she could get the home birth she wanted, she walked about using her house deposit savings on getting a private midwife. I have no idea if she did in the end.

OP, I don't think you are bad, and you clearly love your kids, but I think you do need help to become more stable. It's possible the instability and outbursts are contributing to the way this court case is going for you.

There is none so blind as those that will not see.

I doubt this will be the final instalment or version of events. The OP hasn’t seen off her fiancé yet.

I would honestly rip my arms off before I accepted EOW. I've read all your threads, and all I can say is it's incredibly sad that the most enthusiastic you've been in all of this, is paying less for your sons. Congrats op, you now get to pay a minimal amount towards their care, and only have to bother 2 days out of 14. Very, very sad.

She very nearly had quite a late abortion with this baby for much the same reasons

God, yes. I'd forgotten this. I was still at the sympathetic stage when I posted on that thread. She got massive attention from that one.

This is like some twisted novel that just keeps getting worse.. Honestly.

Did the OP originally have rainbow in her user name?

It's like you seek validation that EOW is ok and that you're a wonderful person who fought to the bitter end for their children.. You're in an exceptionally sad situation, and as someone whose going through the family could themselves I know how draining and demoralising it is but my god, the court would have to send someone round to prise DD out of my cold dead fingers before I accepted EOW. You could've put up a case as how your boys need their mother in their lives and that you want to be in their lives and they are being manipulated into saying the contrary.. You fight, fight and fight some more. I don't know what you seek from your multiple threads other than a place to vent your frustration.. That's completely fine. But to me, you've just given up.

You really are all a bunch of bitchy sad women aren't you?!!

Family court*

@Happylittlebluebird

You really are all a bunch of bitchy sad women aren't you?!!

If we are it still doesn’t change the facts of your situation.

@BlueBooby I am so sorry. Only women who have been through it understand exactly how ill the whole thing can make the alienated parent. And that is a part of the plan, sadly. I hope you get your kids back with you soon xx

From your other thread today

"My little boy said tonight he can't sleep because he's so scared of being taken away from me more. And that's exactly what is going to happen. No decent mother deserves this."

No CHILD deserves this. When he can't sleep because he didn't want to leave you, surely you give everything to keep fighting for them.

I take it he hasn't expressed that view to cafcass?

@Somuchgoo I agree. No child does deserve this. He told Cafcass he wanted EOW so that is what is happening.

Ah that's ok then, him telling cafcass that totally absolves you of your responsibility as his parent to fight for a scared little boy...

Yes it's ridiculously hard. Yes you may lose, but you can cuddle him, look him in the eye and say you gave your absolute best and tried everything.

@Somuchgoo So Cafcass made the recommendation that the boys' wishes must be followed. The judge will not go against these recommendations. FFS why don't you get it?!!
Google Parental Alienation and then come back when you've done your research.

I've fully researched up love 🙄

Don't you see that having an upset boy who wants to stay, and then effectively shrugging your shoulders and walking away is playing exactly into your exes hands, and it's betraying that little boy.

@Happylittlebluebird google abandonment

I've realised you've a whole pile of threads on the go, about benefits, childcare options etc, to do with your baby & current DP and it's like your DSs don't even exist 😢

But the other day you were all for moving far away with your new family and forgetting your boys!

So on your thread from Sunday you state you’re married again?
And that your sons won’t attend your funeral? I’m also confused as to why you spoke past tense “when they were teenagers”
I am doubting this is even real tbh and your sons are now grown up. Pathetic.