Things I wasn't aware of until I joined MN

[Truckulent]

This is meant to be light-hearted, as i'm snowed in and climbing the walls. If it gets 5 posts I'll be surprised.

Also this could end up with me and Belfastbloke posting.

But as a Dad wending my slightly puzzled way through life. Until I landed on MN I'd never heard, thought of or been aware of the following:

1. Greggs sausage rolls and Fruit Shoots are considered the work of the devil. I love the sausage rolls.

1. Wohm and SAHM debate, it's never cropped up before in my life, surely it's whatever suits each family.

1. Boden. Never ever heard of it before.

1. Breast and bottle feeding. Never really had an

opinion, if it wasn't working for the mother, fair enough I thought.

1. Zombie plans. Absolutely brilliant idea.

1. Pantenne, never heard of it but I'll give it a try. I

thought it was a shampoo.

1. How many men are considered twats.

1. Never seen the word cunt written down so many times and used in conversations.

1. Never realized how many feisty intelligent women

there are out there and wish I met more like you in RL (sounds a bit arse-licky but true) as i don't like cars debating with men can be so boring.

Self-indulgent? Probably.

Bored out of my brains? Yes, I need to get out again
and participate in some sort of sporting activity.

Any more things men (or women) didn't know.

Or am I on my own in dadsnet?

To be fair to Cheryl Curle, I rather think she could keep herself in designer dresses and probably her ex-H too...

Well, true enough now. But maybe not when she met him.

At least she ditched him anyway. I was well proud of her when she did that. Abby Clancy needs a few more paycheques off This Morning before she'll ditch that lanky streak of piss.

Some women just seem to be willfully blind, particularly those who seem to accept they can work as hard as a man and then do 100% of the second shift at home. Why they accept that amazes me. It also applies both ways round. Plenty of men have none working wives who hardly do a stroke of house work and pretty poor childcare and then the man gets home from work and does it all.

Is Peter Crouch that bad?

He did a good self deprecating joke.

Interviewer: What would you be if you weren't a Premiership footballer?

Crouchy: A virgin.

I thought he seemed very nice indeed until he did some bad stuff with a prostitute whilst he had a just-pregnant girlfriend waiting at home.

I reckon all footballers are the same; too much money, too many "yes" people. They feel entitled to behave how they like because they are treated like gods by morons. I do not see why any intelligent woman would enter any kind of relationship with one (except for the ££££££s) With the exception of Gary Linekar, who I love

P.S my cousin is a secondary school teacher and he says when discussing options for GCSEs with year 9s, the number one career choice amongst the girls is WAG

I knew that women could be unpleasant to each other, but as a bloke I haven't witnessed it a lot, for obv. reasons - until MN showed the variety of ways women do it to each other.
Though the fiesty, opininionated, 'i know it all and I'm going to tell you all about it' posters I do find quite sort of sexy....

and I didn't know what dragon butter was, and eveyone should google it.

and I ddin't know that women like expat DO actually exist!

Alouiseg, reading the relationship threads turns me all Mrs Bennet. Circumspect. Nice.

bupcakes:

Ohh yeah

*Bad stuff with a prostitute" That is going into the quote book

I'm working on a theory that Father Christmas is sexist:

1. He works one day a year, so we all know who is doing the work the other 364 days, Mother Christmas.

He's obviously a cock-lodger. And who chooses the presents? MC again.

'Sorted the presents yet?'

'I'll do it later'

'every year you leave it until the last minute, no I'll end up doing it again, you'd only get it wrong anyway'

1. This may be an urban myth but the reindeer ,including Rudolph, are female. Oppression again. What are the male Reindeer doing? Waiting for the carrots to be brought back, lazy feckers.

1. He's a binge-drinker, one day a year, millions of

sherries? Definite alcoholic, and I bet he's good for nothing the next day. Who'll make the dinner?

Anyway, off to shake my belly like a bowl full of jelly.

Someone been watching Friends, Truckulent?

That can't be true about lineker?

Bup- I'm watching Friends now. Daughters favourite programme (and one of mine)

I don't believe that about Gary either!

What's your favourite episode, Truckulent?

The one where Chandler listens to the tape, thinking it is to help stop smoking, but it tells him he is a strong confident women. He comes out with the towel wrapped round his head, gets a man bag, and puts the lipbalm on like lipstick.

And yours?

He seems so ok.

Well, he dumped his missus and took up with Danielle Buxom, didn't he?...

Heh heh I remember that one! Mine is the one where Ross finds out about Joey and Rachel and loses the plot. "I'm fine!" and "N is for how NORMAL I find this!" being highlights.

Gary doesn't seem the type. But then neither did Crouchy. You think he'd be so grateful having a fit girlfriend waiting for him at home that he wouldn't dream of straying. The dirty article.

True, I just remember him not getting booked and playing well for England.

It is a shame when you find out your (in my youth) heroes are fallible.

I thought he'd been single a while when ge met Danielle Bux and he met her when mutual friends set them up on a blind date?

We've all the DVDs for Friends, top show, watching QI for the moment after a mammoth pressie wrapping marathon.

It always comes up on these threads but the things in the side of cling film boxes to hold the cling film in - it was a revelation when I read it on one of these "what have your learnt from mumsnet".